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Long story short, I have a few friends who are not my race, two of them I have been friends with since we were teenagers, and the other I have been friends with for almost 9 years.
They will sometimes casually say that they hate people of my race, or if I talk about someone who is of my race and they did something wrong or bad, they will say that's the reason why they hate people of my race...
It doesn't happen all the time, and a few times I have said something about it, but I can tell that it doesn't affect them. They seem to have these deeply held beliefs. I am not sure why they are friends with me and other people of my race, but then they will say that they hate us.
Advice?
If they are 'racist toward you,' then they aren't your real friends.
Dump them, and find real friends who have more class and quality.
Long story short, I have a few friends who are not my race, two of them I have been friends with since we were teenagers, and the other I have been friends with for almost 9 years.
They will sometimes casually say that they hate people of my race, or if I talk about someone who is of my race and they did something wrong or bad, they will say that's the reason why they hate people of my race...
It doesn't happen all the time, and a few times I have said something about it, but I can tell that it doesn't affect them. They seem to have these deeply held beliefs. I am not sure why they are friends with me and other people of my race, but then they will say that they hate us.
Advice?
You think they are racist, and if you are racist you wouldnt bother.
One of my friends started dating a new boyfriend who really, really hated white people. I have noticed it started to rub off on her because she seems to have done a 180 and now is acting a lot like him and only associating with people of their race, and no more white people, even though my friend's mom is white!
I don't want to confront her, because obviously that would make her uncomfortable because she loves her boyfriend.
This is horribly sad. How does her new boyfriend feel about having a white mother-in-law? Ignorance breeds ignorance and you should talk to your friend about the path she is taking. She sounds like she's a tad shallow. If any of my friends disrespected any of my ethnic friends they would be called on the carpet and reminded to accept, respect, live and let live. By staying silent you are condoning her actions. Talk to her and tell her to come back into the light. This hatred is soul crushing and people who live in it live in a dark place. Help her.
Maybe people as such should go visit a nursing home, and pay attention to the diversity of people taking care of a diverse group of people, then they might learn something about respecting humanity of people in general.
Go to a hospital and take notice of people of all races and how they all care about their loved ones with the same compassion's as does any other race.
When it comes to the need of a blood transfusion, ask your so called friends if they will refuse the blood if it comes from a particular race.
Ask them if they believe in the old Antebellum idea that one drop of blood from a black person makes a person black, then if they say so, then ask them what would it make a white person who receives 1-2 or more units of blood from a black person. " would they still be considered as white or would they be considered now as being black"
If they needed an organ transplant, would they refuse the organ if it came from a person from a different race?
The OP is a white female being abused by her black 'friends' for being white. Shocking, huh? I think she's nuts for sticking around.
The OP is a white female being abused by her black 'friends' for being white. Shocking, huh? I think she's nuts for sticking around.
The same I will say applies as to logic.
I don't think any people black or white, should take abuse from anyone in these ways. People need to get over the racial stereotyping of entire ethnic groups.
The world would be such a better place if people let go of such "ignorance".
I don't think any people black or white, should take abuse from anyone in these ways. People need to get over the racial stereotyping of entire ethnic groups.
The world would be such a better place if people let go of such "ignorance".
BUT, there are some truths to stereotypes, nothing 'ignorant' about it.
All races and cultures are different, people need to get over it ... some cultures are better than others.
Long story short, I have a few friends who are not my race, two of them I have been friends with since we were teenagers, and the other I have been friends with for almost 9 years.
They will sometimes casually say that they hate people of my race, or if I talk about someone who is of my race and they did something wrong or bad, they will say that's the reason why they hate people of my race...
It doesn't happen all the time, and a few times I have said something about it, but I can tell that it doesn't affect them. They seem to have these deeply held beliefs. I am not sure why they are friends with me and other people of my race, but then they will say that they hate us.
Advice?
TELL THEM! Sometimes humans are too blind to see their own ignorance. So bring it to their attention: Tell them! Show them the error of their thinking — politely but firmly.
You'll be amazed at how people can change when the spotlight of truth is shined upon them.
As a white woman, the way I see, it I use the word "b***h" with some of my female friends and in such cases, it's a term of endearment or teasing. But if a stranger called me that, I'd raise a fuss they wouldn't forget. Similarly, I've heard some of my gay friends call their other gay friends "f**s". And I'm from Jersey, so I have often used the word "motherf*****" in an affectionate sense.
I think when some black people use the N word, it's just an acknowledgement of community or shared experience, and I have seen black people get upset at other black people who call them that word but don't know them personally. Tone, community and personal preference are all contextual issues in such situations.
And I just don't get people who are all "well they use the word, why can't I?" Well, mainly because it's a word that was never used to bludgeon and dehumanize you, your ancestors, your loved ones or people like you in general. In an even modestly polite world, it's just not your word.
I don't get people freaking out because certain words are off-limits to them. English is a many-faceted and very rich language. If you NEED to use a slur that you know is hurtful and deeply offensive to a large swathe of people to get your point across, you need to work on your vocabulary (and being less boorish).
And here's a quote from Neil Gaiman that I really thought summed it up quite nicely:
I was reading a book (about interjections, oddly enough) yesterday which included the phrase “In these days of political correctness…” talking about no longer making jokes that denigrated people for their culture or for the colour of their skin. And I thought, “That’s not actually anything to do with ‘political correctness’. That’s just treating other people with respect.”
Either everybody can use it, or nobody can. At least white people pronounce it correctly. I don't use it, I hage some friends that might use it, sometimes, and no, none of them are black. Most of them are Juggalos, and Juggalettes, didn't grow up in the best of neighbourhoods, and it happens. I don't use it, niether do a few of my friends, I'm the one who just doesn't use it, the others that don't, don't because they hate racial slurs. No one, however calls me the n-word for any reason. If it's not directed at me, I don't care, and they often think it's funny if I use it to describe what ghetto black people do, because I never use it, although I use other black people slurs a bit more for that, because it's funnier- sometimes. I'd quote Uncle Ruckus on that, but I like being here.
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Tell them!
Sometimes humans are too blind to see their own ignorance. So bring it to their attention: Tell them! Show them the error of their thinking — politely but firmly.
