The much-despised "ma'am" word (males, member, conversation, wife)

[Mordin]

At least he didn't call her "madam!"

[NewbieHere]

Originally Posted by zitsky

What's wrong with a child learning how to address people? It's not like the woman roughed him up and said you *will* call me "Mrs" (slap, slap)!!!! She just explained that she prefers to be called something more formal.

Maybe this should be taught in California's school, but it's not. So I guess it's not considered not proper around here.

[bigdumbgod]

Originally Posted by NewbieHere

Maybe this should be taught in California's school, but it's not. So I guess it's not considered not proper around here.

We should teach manners in school? Not sure that's going to garner terribly wide support.

[MarciaMarshaMarcia]

Originally Posted by bigdumbgod

We should teach manners in school? Not sure that's going to garner terribly wide support.

Manners & respect...not much of that between people anymore. They aren't bad things.

[bigdumbgod]

Originally Posted by TurquoiseOne

Manners & respect...not much of that between people anymore. They aren't bad things.

Teachers ought not be expected to do the socializing skills instruction a parent should be imparting to their kids.

[MarciaMarshaMarcia]

Originally Posted by bigdumbgod

Teachers ought not be expected to do the socializing skills instruction a parent should be imparting to their kids.

True that...but gotta get it somewhere.

[NewbieHere]

Originally Posted by bigdumbgod

We should teach manners in school? Not sure that's going to garner terribly wide support.

No, I don't mean manners in school. But if the teachers insist young children to address them as ma'am or sir , but they don't in California. And that means it's not the norm. My kids address their teachers as Mr and Mrs and not Ma'am and Sir.

[zitsky]

Originally Posted by NewbieHere

No, I don't mean manners in school. But if the teachers insist young children to address them as ma'am or sir , but they don't in California. And that means it's not the norm. My kids address their teachers as Mr and Mrs and not Ma'am and Sir.

What?! You mean they don't call them by their first names? LOL

[Sanpinn]

From my perspective, the use of "Ma'am" or "Sir" is simply an indication of courtesy and respect. Sadly, these are two qualities that are in short supply these days, so it didn't surprise me to see a number of people in this thread who had difficulty grasping the concept behind the usage of the terms. It seems
misguided to think that one should adapt their own mode of communication involving courtesies to a geographical area because something is "not common in California." How we address people reflects upon who we are as individuals, and I, for one; was never one to conform to a common way solely for
the purpose of being just like everyone else. As well, I would be hard-pressed to eliminate the good manners I was taught as a child - those things are ingrained; and quite frankly, I wouldn't want to get rid of them.

Out of curiosity, I wanted to find out what the dictionary had to say about the word "Ma'am" - check this out:
Definition - "Ma'am":
1. A term used in Britain addressing the Queen or a Royal Princess.
2. Ma'am is used as a title of respect, especially when addressing female Royalty.
(Source: © Collins English Dictionary, William Collins Sons & Co. Ltd.)
>> Origin of "Ma'am": 1660-70, contraction of Madam.
(Source: Random House Dictionary, © Random House, Inc. 2015.)
Interesting, huh? So we learn that "Ma'am" did not originate from the southern states of America - but rather from across the pond!

Spreading kindness and courtesy to strangers is a matter that is very important to me - I extend them every chance I get. I'll hold the door for someone coming up behind me so it doesn't slam shut in their face - they always react in a pleasantly surprised way. I'm the driver who will back off a bit and let you merge in, or change lanes to exit, rather than speeding up to be ahead of you. If I see someone in a wheelchair in the grocery store looking upward at the shelves, I'm inclined to ask them if I can get something for them. And you will know it's me if one day, a stranger you're walking past smiles at you first, or says to you, "Well, don't you look nice today?!" None of this behavior is common in California, but you know what? People who are recipients of my kindness and courtesy always seem grateful. And, I wouldn't entertain the notion of refraining from addressing someone in a courteous manner just because to do so was not typically done in California! That seems like an absurd justification for why the word "Ma'am" isn't employed here. You never know how a stranger's kindness might cause
a fundamental change for the better in someone. And actually, I must admit that I do have a bit of an ulterior motive behind it all - I'm hoping that it could have the ripple effect so that people will be nicer to each other. You might say I'm a Dreamer - but I'm not the only one .......

[Sanpinn]

Originally Posted by bigdumbgod

Teachers ought not be expected to do the socializing skills instruction a parent should be imparting to their kids.

Although I completely agree with you that it is the parent's responsibility to teach their child good manners and proper social graces, children do learn by example. The classroom is a place that is, in actuality, the ideal setting in which children apply social skills as they learn how to interact with others
of their own age and as they learn how to deal with life on life's terms - not their own. If a teacher observes one of the children misbehaving in a disrespectful manner towards the others, she holds the prime opportunity in her hands to nip that behavior in the bud while it is happening real time. For her
to ignore bad behavior shows the misbehaving child and all the others that it is acceptable because it
went unaddressed and was tolerated. I'm thinking that the classroom is the environment where really
young children learn socializing skills through forced interaction with the others, no? While the teacher
should not be tasked with intensive behavior modification and such, she is in a position of influence over
the children; by default.