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Yes, there is, only issue is that my father is far away, and I cannot commute daily to college as a result. It is roughly 60 miles one way. Furthermore, I could not help out at the local shop if I live that far away, and my father's house is kind of a work in progress, we've been building it together for four years now doing everything by ourselves (he has been doing most everything, being a lifelong carpenter and contractor). So he has the occupancy, but cannot take on my stuff just yet, as the garage is full of his saws and everything.
However, I guess that the whole move would just be more of weighing pros and cons, I guess.
I wasn't suggesting that you move to your father's, that would make it too difficult to commute to school. I was responding to the problem of your brother messing with your car by moving the car to a different location if you could.
I doubt selling the car would provide you with enough money to rent an apartment for 2 years, but at least it would be safe from your brother.
Honestly, you're close enough to graduation that if I were you I would tough it out and try to spend as little time at home as possible.
I really hope you get your own tv in your room. Try getting a huge pc monitor and hooking it to your pc/ internet with an appropriate cable. (awesome free tv and movies on the net). And a little tiny fridge ( i do NOT recommend a microwave, they are not as safe as they say- BUT maybe a toaster oven- they're cheap and good). And as someone said, a lock for your bedroom door--- It's sooo easy to take off a doorknob and replace it with a locking one--- or just add a simple lock.
Avoid your brother, there are so many ways!!!!!! and don't hold it against your mom- a lot of mothers got tired out permanently, just from having you kids. Go easy on her, although, i don't agree with her habits.
Have you told your Dad how your brother treats you???? think he might have a word with him, and would it help or hurt????
Can you keep your car next to the garage where you work for awhile? then move it to someone's side yard??? maybe pay them 50 bucks a month for the space or something.
You did the right thing to ask for advice! that's a sign of brains. Good luck, you now have a few ideas and goals you could work towards and plan for.
ps- you might try applying for credit at big stores and visa etc- at your bank- Amazon, Walmart cards are usually easy to get online (reputable businesses only ok) --- and manage it wisely, shop the sales, carefully. It can help you get things you need in a hurry. Just make sure you will be able to afford the monthly payments. Sometimes it is well worth it to spend a little money, for things you really need.
Quote:
Originally Posted by Thekid111
Well, get ready for a long story. To start off, I am 20 years old, and am at home commuting to college for engineering, and help out at a local car shop in trade for parts, and have a project hot rod.
I have had a problem for a few years, but it has been getting worse, and I need help to fix it. My father is divorced from my mother, and lives fifty miles away. My older brother tosses my things all around, ruins my progress on my project car, tells me to kill myself constantly, and will not allow me to do simple things like watching tv without harassment. He is 22 years old, never went to college (makes sure to make in front of me for going), works in a heavy equipment Union, and has been working since 18 making at least 30 bucks an hour for more than 40 hours a week; at times. He makes sure everyone knows that he makes a lot of money. He doesn't want to move out as he sees that if he stays, he has my mother washing clothes, dishes, food, etc.
My mother describes herself as a weekend warrior and drinks and goes out on the weekends. She has been divorced for about 10 years, is almost 60, and I have observed that the reason why she fought for me and my brothers during divorce was so that she did not have to work for the rest of her life. Long story, but she got money from my old house, used some of it to pay for the new house, and has the child support from my father and help from my uncle footing all of the mortgage while food stamps and other programs cover the rest.
On the weekends while I try to just work on my project car, my older brother tells me to kill myself, tells me that I am wasting my time, hides my parts and tools on me, etc. I can hardly get anything done. When I go in to make myself some lunch, he calls me names, calls me useless and dumb, and if I am trying to watch tv, he comes in and takes over. If I go to bed, he'll swing by from time to time just to make sure that I don't feel good about myself. My mother sees that it is crazy, and she says fixing the issue is not worth her time.
So, I just keep getting abused here, and I have no help. There is a lot more I am leaving out, but you get the point. I do not have any income, and sad to say it, but having a project car has kind of tied me down. I am paying for it with money made off of a paid co op which lasted 6 months, and I am a junior in college. Is there anything I can do? What can I do to make my life better.
Last edited by 2bpurrfect; 12-28-2015 at 12:30 AM..
I really hope you get your own tv in your room. Try getting a huge pc monitor and hooking it to your pc/ internet with an appropriate cable. (awesome free tv and movies on the net). And a little tiny fridge. And as someone said, a lock for your bedroom door--- It's sooo easy to take off a doorknob and replace it with a locking one--- or just add a simple lock. Avoid your brother, there are so many ways!!!!!! and don't hold it against your mom- a lot of mothers got tired just from having you kids. Go easy on her, although, i don't know if i like her habits.
Can you keep your car next to the garage where you work for awhile? then move it to someone's side yard??? maybe pay them 50 bucks a month for the space or something.
You did the right thing to ask for advice! that's a sign of brains. Good luck, you now have a few ideas and goals you could work towards and plan for.
ps- you might try applying for credit at big stores and visa etc- at your bank- Amazon, Walmart cards are usually easy to get online (reputable businesses only ok) --- and manage it wisely, carefully. It can help you get things you need in a hurry.
did you really just encourage an engineering student to violate the law on viewing digital media?
So, I just keep getting abused here, and I have no help. There is a lot more I am leaving out, but you get the point. I do not have any income, and sad to say it, but having a project car has kind of tied me down. I am paying for it with money made off of a paid co op which lasted 6 months, and I am a junior in college. Is there anything I can do? What can I do to make my life better.
What can you do? Finish your degree in engineering.
How in the H are you paying for it? Did I miss that part?
Your brother is a sad misfit and a wretch. Just put up with him till you finish school.
If I weren't married with a family, I'd offer you a place to live.
Well, get ready for a long story. To start off, I am 20 years old, and am at home commuting to college for engineering, and help out at a local car shop in trade for parts, and have a project hot rod.
I have had a problem for a few years, but it has been getting worse, and I need help to fix it. My father is divorced from my mother, and lives fifty miles away. My older brother tosses my things all around, ruins my progress on my project car, tells me to kill myself constantly, and will not allow me to do simple things like watching tv without harassment. He is 22 years old, never went to college (makes sure to make in front of me for going), works in a heavy equipment Union, and has been working since 18 making at least 30 bucks an hour for more than 40 hours a week; at times. He makes sure everyone knows that he makes a lot of money. He doesn't want to move out as he sees that if he stays, he has my mother washing clothes, dishes, food, etc.
My mother describes herself as a weekend warrior and drinks and goes out on the weekends. She has been divorced for about 10 years, is almost 60, and I have observed that the reason why she fought for me and my brothers during divorce was so that she did not have to work for the rest of her life. Long story, but she got money from my old house, used some of it to pay for the new house, and has the child support from my father and help from my uncle footing all of the mortgage while food stamps and other programs cover the rest.
On the weekends while I try to just work on my project car, my older brother tells me to kill myself, tells me that I am wasting my time, hides my parts and tools on me, etc. I can hardly get anything done. When I go in to make myself some lunch, he calls me names, calls me useless and dumb, and if I am trying to watch tv, he comes in and takes over. If I go to bed, he'll swing by from time to time just to make sure that I don't feel good about myself. My mother sees that it is crazy, and she says fixing the issue is not worth her time.
So, I just keep getting abused here, and I have no help. There is a lot more I am leaving out, but you get the point. I do not have any income, and sad to say it, but having a project car has kind of tied me down. I am paying for it with money made off of a paid co op which lasted 6 months, and I am a junior in college. Is there anything I can do? What can I do to make my life better.
Sell the project car, get a part time job instead, finish college as quickly as possible, get a real job and move out. It's not that complicated.
did you really just encourage an engineering student to violate the law on viewing digital media?
Not necessarily. Lots of networks now put their content online for a couple weeks after it airs in case people missed seeing it when it originally aired on TV.
Sell the project car, get a part time job instead, finish college as quickly as possible, get a real job and move out. It's not that complicated.
^^^This^^^.
If OP can't bear to sell the car, see if he can store it under a tarp at his dad's place.
The brother sounds like a moron and the less time the OP spends around him, the better.
Reduce the opportunities for interaction. Study at the library. Arrange hours of part-time job. Get a lock on bedroom door. Grab a sandwich and go study. Or watch a movie on a laptop.
Before he knows it, OP will be comparing job offers and out of this nonsense.
Got to feel sorry for his mother though. Regardless of her shortcomings, imagine putting up with this B.S. year after effing year.
OP has gotten a lot of good advice, and I hope he takes it. I will just add that the next two years will go by in the blink of an eye, and real life lasts a lot time. If you have made it this far in school, you will make it the rest of the way, and you can be free of everyone who is hindering you now.
As others have said, don't get bogged down with that car. Store it or sell it. It's just a car, and it is an anchor that is holding you back.
Is your father still paying your mother child support for you while you are living there going to college? Maybe you can get him to pay you the child support directly to help with living expenses. Move the car to your dad's house, or sell it. Go work on it over the weekends and holidays if you want, or just leave it there. Get a part time job. MOVE OUT! Living with an abusive older sibling is demeaning, and you don't have to do it. Tell your mother exactly why you are moving out, that it sucks that she allows this abusive leech to stay there and bully you, and force you out while you are still in college. Cut the older brother out of your life completely. He will never change. You're lucky he hasn't done worse to you. And yes, it IS your mother's fault for having permitted it under her roof.
Is there anything I can do? What can I do to make my life better.
Maybe you just ditch the project car and save your money so you can move out of your parents house. After all, you're doing the same thing your brother is - if you can afford a project car, you could live on your own.
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