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I don't think there is a need for tough love, but I don't know that the OP is all wrong either. Brother has been living with mom for five years. Mom most likely wasn't always this needy. All of would probably be guilty of procrastinating at one time or another. Maybe the original plan was for mom to go back home. At this point, all that can be done is to move forward. Pay the taxes. Brother and mom move back home or sell it. Take some time off and be prepared to bring some people in, clean out the house and get it on the market because brother isn't going to want to live there.
If I were op I wouldn't take a leave of absence but I would book a trip and see for yourself what is going on!
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