Welcome to City-Data.com Forum!
U.S. CitiesCity-Data Forum Index
Go Back   City-Data Forum > General Forums > Non-Romantic Relationships
 [Register]
Please register to participate in our discussions with 2 million other members - it's free and quick! Some forums can only be seen by registered members. After you create your account, you'll be able to customize options and access all our 15,000 new posts/day with fewer ads.
View detailed profile (Advanced) or search
site with Google Custom Search

Search Forums  (Advanced)
Reply Start New Thread
 
Old 04-03-2016, 06:20 PM
 
Location: Washington state
450 posts, read 545,314 times
Reputation: 643

Advertisements

my personal opinion is that often it's tacky and entitled shameless begging. Some circumstances that seem ok to me are if the death was sudden and/or traumatic so that really the family couldn't have prepared for the expenses or loss of a breadwinner, or if the GoFundMe is on behalf a child/ren who cannot ask for him/herself.

For example this is a heartbreaking example that I would donate to:
https://www.gofundme.com/8epka2sc
Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message

 
Old 04-03-2016, 06:50 PM
 
13,975 posts, read 25,839,073 times
Reputation: 39852
I've read two "gofundme" requests this week, for the families of two local men who died recently. One was a young firefighter, who died under mysterious circumstances, not in the line of duty though. That request was to raise $200,000 to pay for his 2 children's future needs, such as birthday parties and proms(stated as such). It isn't going well.

The other was a professional man who wrecked his sports car. There is no conceivable reason for him not to have a healthy life insurance policy, given his address and his job title. That one actually exceeded the requested goal.

I see the benefit of donating cash instead of flowers, and don't mind doing so. I understand that a young family can lose the main breadwinner without having a sufficient safety net. But the sheer volume of these requests has turned me off, and the reasons given for raising money have become ridiculous. I sometimes doubt the family is even aware the page has been set up.
Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message
 
Old 04-03-2016, 07:04 PM
 
Location: Arizona
8,224 posts, read 8,551,487 times
Reputation: 27498
I am glad to see I wasn't the only one to think the way I do.

#12 mentioning the family may not be aware of the page never entered my mind.
Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message
 
Old 04-03-2016, 07:05 PM
 
Location: Leaving fabulous Las Vegas, Nevada
4,053 posts, read 8,221,235 times
Reputation: 8040
Quote:
Originally Posted by Mattie View Post
I've read two "gofundme" requests this week, for the families of two local men who died recently. One was a young firefighter, who died under mysterious circumstances, not in the line of duty though. That request was to raise $200,000 to pay for his 2 children's future needs, such as birthday parties and proms(stated as such). It isn't going well.

The other was a professional man who wrecked his sports car. There is no conceivable reason for him not to have a healthy life insurance policy, given his address and his job title. That one actually exceeded the requested goal.

I see the benefit of donating cash instead of flowers, and don't mind doing so. I understand that a young family can lose the main breadwinner without having a sufficient safety net. But the sheer volume of these requests has turned me off, and the reasons given for raising money have become ridiculous. I sometimes doubt the family is even aware the page has been set up.
I would be upset if someone took it upon themselves to put up a gofundme page for my family. That's a communication fail.
Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message
 
Old 04-03-2016, 07:12 PM
 
1,834 posts, read 2,009,527 times
Reputation: 4351
I recently learned of a young single mother who was forced to take an extended leave of absence from her job so she could receive aggressive chemotherapy and surgery following a cancer diagnosis. Last I heard she was not doing well. I would have gladly donated had one of her friends created a Go Fund Me page for her but she opposed any such thing and apparently prefers that as few people as possible know of her plight. Some of these requests, though, are ridiculous. I can see where a family might need assistance after losing the breadwinner, but for proms and parties, really? And the wedding requests are outrageous.
Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message
 
Old 04-03-2016, 07:15 PM
 
11,865 posts, read 16,951,794 times
Reputation: 20084
This is a pet peeve of mine. There are rare cases that I would ever consider donating.

Funerals, education and daily expenses are a part of life. I don't think anyone should get donations for those things.

There's a woman in my neighborhood who set up a page because she lost her job last year. She refuses to take a non managerial position so she's been unemployed for almost a year. She and her husband are about to lose their house. Ugh. I'll let them be homeless before I donate to her laziness.
Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message
 
Old 04-03-2016, 07:26 PM
 
Location: San Antonio, TX
11,495 posts, read 26,745,148 times
Reputation: 28029
Quote:
Originally Posted by Kibbiekat View Post

Before gofundme, I used to see fundraiser car washes when a member of a lower income family died suddenly.
People here still have plate sales to raise money for funerals. Sometimes it seems like an expected part of the funeral tradition...the memorial plate sale, then the rosary, then the funeral. And it would feel funny to some families to skip the plate sale.
Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message
 
Old 04-03-2016, 07:41 PM
Status: "I'm turquoise happy!" (set 29 days ago)
 
Location: The New England part of Ohio
23,885 posts, read 32,179,551 times
Reputation: 67793
Even if you already own a plot and opt for a pine box and a church service or graveside service with no viewing at the wake - funeral costs are expensive. Cremation is not cheap either.

Grave diggers are expensive, to start with.

I see no problem with a "Go Fund Me" for a funeral. People have "Go Fund Me" accounts for much more trivial matters.

Honorariums for clergy people can be expensive. Not everyone has the luxury of saving for a funeral.
Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message
 
Old 04-03-2016, 07:44 PM
 
4,965 posts, read 5,220,437 times
Reputation: 15711
I'd give $20 in lieu of flowers for someone I know. I'll donate if someone died unexpectedly at a young age and it's a major hardship for the family. I don't agree with many of the Go Fund Me requests. If you can't afford a big funeral,then you shouldn't have one. Pick the cheapest cremation, skip the big procession and funeral home and funeral. Have a potluck and have a memorial service you put on yourself.
Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message
 
Old 04-03-2016, 07:49 PM
 
Location: Denver 'burbs
24,012 posts, read 28,352,998 times
Reputation: 41121
I've never actually seen such a request. Funerals that I've attended often request donations to a charity in lieu of flowers.

Like others, i can understand it in certain situations (death of a child, a truly financially strapped family) but in situations where there was or should have been adequate life insurance, i don't understand asking others to fund a personal expense.
Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message
Please register to post and access all features of our very popular forum. It is free and quick. Over $68,000 in prizes has already been given out to active posters on our forum. Additional giveaways are planned.

Detailed information about all U.S. cities, counties, and zip codes on our site: City-data.com.


Reply
Please update this thread with any new information or opinions. This open thread is still read by thousands of people, so we encourage all additional points of view.

Quick Reply
Message:


Over $104,000 in prizes was already given out to active posters on our forum and additional giveaways are planned!

Go Back   City-Data Forum > General Forums > Non-Romantic Relationships
Similar Threads

All times are GMT -6.

© 2005-2024, Advameg, Inc. · Please obey Forum Rules · Terms of Use and Privacy Policy · Bug Bounty

City-Data.com - Contact Us - Archive 1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9, 10, 11, 12, 13, 14, 15, 16, 17, 18, 19, 20, 21, 22, 23, 24, 25, 26, 27, 28, 29, 30, 31, 32, 33, 34, 35, 36, 37 - Top