Please register to participate in our discussions with 2 million other members - it's free and quick! Some forums can only be seen by registered members. After you create your account, you'll be able to customize options and access all our 15,000 new posts/day with fewer ads.
Yes, it's all about her isn't it....LOL. How is your vacation imposed on when it's a couple of hours? And the
"someone's vacation home", isn't the OP's home. She has no say in who is there or isn't there. If she doesn't like that, than "see ya". What don't you get?
Now if the brother showed up uannounced and univtied at the OP's house, that's a different story.
But that isn't what happened.
How many times do I have to repeat what the OP earlier stated?: "If they continue to come, she'll no longer go." Read, man, read.
OP, this situation is easily solved.
Stay away from *your parents* beach home.
Buy your own beach home and make it your *happy place*.
Keep your brother away from your children if he is still using illegal drugs.
Quit blaming innocent children and a woman you do not know for this situation and blame your brother since he is the one who caused the issue.
Also, the beach house is *not* more yours than hers, it belongs to your parents and you should address it as *theirs* alone.
It might not hurt to seek professional help with your misdirected anger issues.
Bless your heart.
I don't think the girlfriend and her kids are the only issue either. There's a lot of underlying jealousy in much the OP has written. In the very first post, she mentions that her parents paid for her brother's rehab. How is that relevant to what she says is the issue? Everything she's said indicates far more worry about the state of her vacation than the state of her brother's health.
If one of my siblings were addicted to drugs (or alcohol), I would of course keep them away from my children but I would also be expressing profound fear about their well-being, something we haven't heard much from the OP. Addicts don't usually respond well to punitive measures. Perhaps the parents get that and are trying to make him feel valued.
As many others have mentioned, it's up to the parents alone to decide what guests to invite to THEIR beach house.
I dont want her in my family. I see her being nothing but a burden.
But why can't you see it's not her but your brother who is the burden? She has a job, he doesn't, right? You say your parents give your brother money; she's not taking their money. How do they get around - which one has a car? Sounds like it's her car. Your mother has made it clear that she will not uninvite this woman or her kids from visiting if your brother chooses to bring them along.
I don't think the girlfriend and her kids are the only issue either. There's a lot of underlying jealousy in much the OP has written. In the very first post, she mentions that her parents paid for her brother's rehab. How is that relevant to what she says is the issue? Everything she's said indicates far more worry about the state of her vacation than the state of her brother's health.
If one of my siblings were addicted to drugs (or alcohol), I would of course keep them away from my children but I would also be expressing profound fear about their well-being, something we haven't heard much from the OP. Addicts don't usually respond well to punitive measures. Perhaps the parents get that and are trying to make him feel valued.
As many others have mentioned, it's up to the parents alone to decide what guests to invite to THEIR beach house.
If the OP's brother is 33, she's probably done investing emotional time and energy into his bad choices, it gets old after awhile. I've been there with a sibling and after so many years, you kind of give up trying to help them.
Be there for them - yes - but trying to change them and worrying about them every day, that goes away and you get on with your own life. It's up to him to change, so please stop making it sound like the OP is responsible for her brother's bad life choices or whether he turns his life around - she's not.
Last edited by 2002 Subaru; 07-04-2016 at 07:08 AM..
If the OP's brother is 33, she's probably done investing emotional time and energy into his bad choices, it gets old after awhile. I've been there with a sibling and after so many years, you kind of give up trying to help them.
Be there for them - yes - but trying to change them and worrying about them every day, that goes away and you get on with your own life. It's up to him to change, so please stop making it sound like the OP is responsible for her brother's bad life choices or whether he turns his life around - she's not.
There is truth to what you say here. Not all siblings are close and you can't do anything about how they are.
Please register to post and access all features of our very popular forum. It is free and quick. Over $68,000 in prizes has already been given out to active posters on our forum. Additional giveaways are planned.
Detailed information about all U.S. cities, counties, and zip codes on our site: City-data.com.
Please register to participate in our discussions with 2 million other members - it's free and quick! Some forums can only be seen by registered members. After you create your account, you'll be able to customize options and access all our 15,000 new posts/day with fewer ads.
Re
