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Because I said friends normally would help friends move? WTF? Is this not common anymore? In the past you just bought friends beer and pizza and they helped you moved. When the moved, they did the same thing.
No, it isn't common anymore, except among the college crowd, or maybe recent college grads. People in the working world usually pay movers, unless they're in the low-paid service sector.
Making good friends is a matter of finding someone you click with, who has similar interests or values. It's not easy. These days, even maintaining friendships is challenging. People are too busy to get together very often.
Because I said friends normally would help friends move? WTF? Is this not common anymore? In the past you just bought friends beer and pizza and they helped you moved. When the moved, they did the same thing.
Yes, when you're in your 20s.
Quote:
Originally Posted by reebo
How old are you? Maybe this is true the first time you move after college, but after a while, grownups do pay movers.
She said older.
Agree, grownups do pay movers.
Quote:
Originally Posted by Ruth4Truth
No, it isn't common anymore, except among the college crowd, or maybe recent college grads. People in the working world usually pay movers, unless they're in the low-paid service sector.
Making good friends is a matter of finding someone you click with, who has similar interests or values. It's not easy. These days, even maintaining friendships is challenging. People are too busy to get together very often.
Exactly.
I'm getting an "all about me" vibe from the OP. The types who only want to talk about themselves and expect others to do what they expect of them(as in move her I bought you pizza). No concern for people's backs or hernias.
Doesn't think to ask new people things about themselves, and show an interest in their life. We have a very "all about me" society today, Facebook proves that.
I kinda understand the OP but I suspect her situation is not unusual. In this new online world, people are spending all their free time typing away at strangers. Look what we are doing right now. It is Saturday afternoon. Why aren't we out and about? I don't think I have a single friend that I can just drop in and have a beer with. I am not that close to anybody. For most people it is work-home-internet/TV then sleep. It's becoming a lonely world by the day.
The adults I know who are friendless, also move around quite often. They never stick around anywhere long enough to develop lasting friendships with people. I don't know if that is your situation or not, though.
As I've gotten older, my friendships with people either just ended, or it went from friendship to just just being acquaintances.
I really do not have a single person in my life that I consider to be a friend. What I mean by a friend is someone you spend time with, trust, like, and is reliable. I guess someone who is almost like family. I feel like I have several acquaintances but no friends.
I am social and go to the gym, on a coed sports' team, and go to social events in town but nothing ever leads beyond a conversation at that moment.
I just think about this when coworkers ask me how I'm spending my weekend and who I went traveling with (I travel a lot). Nearly every weekend I am alone, and I travel solo as well. I'm also moving 15 miles from where I'm living now and I'm just paying for movers since I have no friends who would help me.
It's really sad that as a kid I had friends but as an adult I have nobody.
I just want to jump in here and say that I do not get a "all about me" vibe from you at all. I have been in your shoes and it is very difficult. When I was younger, I was "friendly" with work people, but we lived in different places, were in different life stages, and wanted to go home after work, so no real friends there. Then I had kids and stayed home with them. That was very isolating and after a move and being alone all the time, I decided that I had to do something different. I joined a church, got involved with a local civic organization, joined the PTO, etc. I made a lot a good friends from these various activities.
However, as my kids get older, and friends move out of the area, I find myself feeling isolated at times again. I still have friends here, but everyone is so busy, that I just don't see people as much as I used to.
I just want to encourage you to take the next step with your acquaintances...invite them out, host a party, etc. Since you are moving, invite your new neighbors over for a get-together. Unfortunately, making new friends can be more challenging as we get older.
Try not to get discouraged. I wish you the best of luck.
I have the same problem. I have friends, and I worked in a career that involved much involvement with the public, and I had good work relations with co workers. But I have failed to maintain a long term, solid adult friendship.
I do blame myself though. I don't think I will ever be able to surmount this.
I do not have problems getting along, and I generally like most people. I do find demanding friendships wearying though.
For me the answer is in family relationships. These are meangingful for me and involve much love going both ways. But I'd love to have a good friend like you want.
But, overall, for me, life is very good. I hope you find a good friendship for yourself.
I am in the same situation. I had a very close relationship with my late husband and we both worked from home. I lost track of high school friends. Neighbors were friendly but not like real friends. It is hard to make friends after a certain age, I think, especially if you don't work outside the home.
Also we moved between VT and the south (thus username). I actually have more friends down south, fellow snowbirds, but they come from a different part of the country than I do.
It's sad because I am a very kind, funny person with a lot to give. I would make a great friend.
I think the OP's user name says a lot about her personality. May be a weird sense of humor, may be some forms of boasting, may be ?? Probably people are turned off by some aspect she is displaying.
OP, FWIW, I don't get any bad vibes off your posts. If you lived closer we could be friends perhaps.
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