Please register to participate in our discussions with 2 million other members - it's free and quick! Some forums can only be seen by registered members. After you create your account, you'll be able to customize options and access all our 15,000 new posts/day with fewer ads.
[quote=tassity22;45566998]I remember reading a Suze Ormon book about managing money and one thing that stuck with me, was she said that nobody is entitled to go to the college they want to, unless they can afford to go without taking out loans. And it doesn't matter how smart they are or how many Ivy League schools they get accepted into; that if they can't afford it, they shouldn't go. She said they should take all their basics at a community college, then transfer to a state university and work while they are in school. So they can graduate with as little debt as possible.
However, a lot of people at age 18 are just not mature enough to understand the serious long term consequences of massive debt.[/QUOTE]
Also many young people today think they're entitled to the best. The thought of going to community college for 2 years is beneath them.
Quote:
Originally Posted by Remington Steel
If they can afford it, why do you consider it "stupid"?
I don't. But many today can't afford as the post below nicely sums it up. Even if you're upper middle class spending $60K for one day is foolish. I know people you would consider well off but they did exactly this. They're nearing retirment age and spent $60K on the daughter's wedding.
If you're part of the 1% have it.
Again, the post belows tells it like it is.
Quote:
Originally Posted by tassity22
Middle class people in our society today want what used to be reserved only for the wealthy. One example of that is college. In earlier times, college was something that was for the rich peoples' kids only. Same thing with big, expensive weddings - it was only high society, wealthy people who had those. People bought small houses to live in, but these days, they want really large homes. A nice car for everyone in the family. Season tickets to al l the football games. Don't want their teenaged kids to have to work summer jobs. It's no wonder consumer debt is so high nowadays. It's true that som e people create their own financial problems. I know people in their 60s who still max out their credit cards at the shopping mall and drive status cars, with virtually no money at all saved for retirement. In fact, some of them don't even know what an IRA or a 401K is. But they know how to apply for credit cards.
Well, the way I see it is, it is their money, spend it how they want. I don't judge people by their spending habits (only my wife and kids). Who am I to say how THEY should spend their money and HOW MUCH they should spend? One might say someone in a certain tax bracket should ONLY spend a certain amount on anything, but what if that same someone sacrifices another life expense to justify spending on something else? If they can make it work, then so be it.
Well, the way I see it is, it is their money, spend it how they want. I don't judge people by their spending habits (only my wife and kids). Who am I to say how THEY should spend their money and HOW MUCH they should spend? One might say someone in a certain tax bracket should ONLY spend a certain amount on anything, but what if that same someone sacrifices another life expense to justify spending on something else? If they can make it work, then so be it.
I don't care how they spend their money either. But don't whine about it later.
In the case of the $60K wedding I mentioned the FOB complained about it months later to me. I never asked what they spent or the wedding itself, this came up over lunch.
I am tired of hearing people complaining about finances when many times they do it to themselves as Tassity 22 mentioned.
To hear about a wedding that a food truck is refreshing.
I don't care how they spend their money either. But don't whine about it later.
In the case of the $60K wedding I mentioned the FOB complained about it months later to me. I never asked what they spent or the wedding itself, this came up over lunch.
I am tired of hearing people complaining about finances when many times they do it to themselves as Tassity 22 mentioned.
To hear about a wedding that a food truck is refreshing.
Some people don't even serve alcohol at the wedding because it's against their religious beliefs.
I've been to a couple of wedding receptions--church basement or recreation room--where cake and a choice of beverages were the only refreshment. That's all folks. There is absolutely nothing wrong with that, but I wasn't expecting it. While I was eating my cake and drinking coffee, I kept wondering if I could snag another piece of cake because I was really hungry.
We hosted a wedding at our house for the son of my best friend at the time. All of the guests were there except the one in charge of bringing the alcohol. Yikes. I had nothing for them to drink for about an hour. Add to the mix the brides mother disliked my friend so therefore she must dislike her best friend as well. She was incredibly rude to me. The grooms mother did not approve of her sons choice and proceeded to tell him so in front of the bride and her family. This wedding should have been on the Jerry Springer show. It was a nightmare.
probably a good thing that the alcohol was delayed!!
I live in Southern CA(not exactly cheap), two people making 100K here with no kids can live quite well.
The couple I am talking about live in MA. Both have new cars, the bride to be(a nice young woman) has a 3 mile commute. When she needed a new car looking at used cars wasn't in the cards, had to get a new one. This was prior to getting married but the wedding was already planned.
Despite living together for 5 years they had to have a big formal wedding.
Some people create their own financial situations. There are reasons why some people have absolutely no savings.
Look, I understand about not needing 10 toasters. I wouldn't even care if they said they preferred cash(which in a roundabout way is what they're doing).
But don't ask people to donate to down payment on a house fund. Or a honeymoon fund.
And the kicker is Honeyfund is taking a percentage of the money given. Once again not much financial planning is going on.
I live in NYC and---I don't know---what do you consider living quite well? Like I said, making a little over 100K isn't getting you far where I am.
Would it bother you less if they'd blown all their money on a wedding and didn't have a Honey Fund? Would you have been less offended if they had a big formal wedding and hadn't lived with each other first?
Honestly, I don't care what people do with their money. Will I give cash or check, REGARDLESS of how much they spend on their wedding and lifestyle? Yes, because that's how I am. Where I live and how I was raised, you always give money for those things. If I don't agree with it or don't really care for the people involved, I just wouldn't attend.
Wedding or not, I don't want to hear anyone complaining about financial holes they've dug themselves into.
Quote:
Originally Posted by Liz_7
Tacky was when my friend's sister was getting married next to a lake, and the ceremony had just started when some dude on a motorboat zoomed by and yelled "Don't do it!"
Maybe it's me but I would've laughed.
Tacky---is my MIL asking us NOT to talk about our wedding because she thought it was "embarrassing" (our theme) because it wasn't the same old boring "Italian" style party she was used to. Wah-wah. She looked MISERABLE throughout the entire reception and we just had non-stop fun. I was so happy to not have my wedding in a catering hall.
I've been to a couple of wedding receptions--church basement or recreation room--where cake and a choice of beverages were the only refreshment. That's all folks. There is absolutely nothing wrong with that, but I wasn't expecting it. While I was eating my cake and drinking coffee, I kept wondering if I could snag another piece of cake because I was really hungry.
I got married over 30 years ago. In the South, that's how it was done! You had cake, punch, nuts, butter mints and maybe cheese straws. (When my daughter got married, I jokingly said she MUST have butter mints, and by golly, she did! lol) Being in a Methodist church, alcohol wasn't an option. We also got married at 2:00. My wedding director (a Great Aunt) said that at 2:00, they don't expect you to feed them a meal!
I recently went to some friends' wedding. The reception was in the church fellowship hall with cake, finger foods, punch AND wine! It was an Episcopal church. A Lutheran minister was behind us in the receiving line when I made a comment about the wine. He said, "Thank God for the Episcopalians!" lol
[CENTER]Save[/CENTER]
I live in NYC and---I don't know---what do you consider living quite well? Like I said, making a little over 100K isn't getting you far where I am.
Would it bother you less if they'd blown all their money on a wedding and didn't have a Honey Fund? Would you have been less offended if they had a big formal wedding and hadn't lived with each other first?
Honestly, I don't care what people do with their money. Will I give cash or check, REGARDLESS of how much they spend on their wedding and lifestyle? Yes, because that's how I am. Where I live and how I was raised, you always give money for those things. If I don't agree with it or don't really care for the people involved, I just wouldn't attend.
Wedding or not, I don't want to hear anyone complaining about financial holes they've dug themselves into.
Maybe it's me but I would've laughed.
Tacky---is my MIL asking us NOT to talk about our wedding because she thought it was "embarrassing" (our theme) because it wasn't the same old boring "Italian" style party she was used to. Wah-wah. She looked MISERABLE throughout the entire reception and we just had non-stop fun. I was so happy to not have my wedding in a catering hall.
Sigh.
I don't care what they do with THEIR MONEY. But I don't like people who whine about it later after the money has been spent. Or who cry "poormouth" to you when you know they spend like a drunk sailor.
I also think it is tacky to ask for donations for your various funds. You want a house, fine. Start with saving money, don't have two new cars when you don't need two new cars, instead of your daily $5 Starbucks put that money into a savings account.
And have a more cost effective wedding.
If a people are very wealthy than have the wedding you want. As Tassity22 said we have a mindset today that people think they're entitled to have it all. Even though they can't afford it.
Know of another situation where the parents took out a second mortgage to pay for a wedding, that is insane.
If I had it over to do, I would have a small, just family ceremony and
then a blow out fun pig picking & drinking party afterwards for
everyone...
Please register to post and access all features of our very popular forum. It is free and quick. Over $68,000 in prizes has already been given out to active posters on our forum. Additional giveaways are planned.
Detailed information about all U.S. cities, counties, and zip codes on our site: City-data.com.
Please register to participate in our discussions with 2 million other members - it's free and quick! Some forums can only be seen by registered members. After you create your account, you'll be able to customize options and access all our 15,000 new posts/day with fewer ads.
