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Birth rates are falling in nearly every country around the world, so that is not the case. Most are just above, near, or below replacement level. Most of Africa will be the main exception to this over the next few decades according to projections.
That's true. In many of the countries in Europe families are only having one child and it's been this way for a few generations. In France and Italy it's not unusual for two only children to marry and have one child. That one child has 4 grandparents with only him/her to focus on. Lots of spoiled children!
In the US our birthrate is also low. We need more responsible families to have lots of kids. We need more kids in the pipeline to take care of our aging population. Replacement level in the US is 2.5 children for each family. Currently in the US the birthrate is 1.88, not close to replacement level. Our population in the US only increases because of immigration. We have more deaths in the US than births. That's not good.
Feel bad for those people too. Codependent at its worst.
And to think the rest of us without kids are boring and unfulfilled. LMAO.
No you admitted that is your life without your kids. And it'll be that way again when they grow up and move on. Unless you find something outside of you kids for fulfillment.
That is so rare. We raise kids for about 20 years, nearly every parent has another identity for those 60 years they aren't raising kids. Don't the majority of people have jobs? And hobbies? And interests? I have never known any parents who had no life other than the twenty years they were raising kids.
I never had my own children and I wouldn't change that.
My Dh had two children and both of them were highly influenced by his ex. Both can be bought and we don't want to buy them. So in his case he would not do it again. It was both disappointing and very sad to find out how his daughter really is. We were very close to her until she showed her true colors.
I ran into similiar circumstances with my own two children, now adults. I never thought the values I taught them would blow right out the front door. It has not been too much of a rewarding experience, but a real learning experience for me. Now that I had them I wouldn't take it back. For anybody listening there is no guarantee no matter how you raise your children they will grow into what you had intended or even like you at all!
People who never had children fantasize about what they would have been like. They're always better than real children. That's a good reason not to have any real ones. Then the only ones you have will always be perfect, and never cause you any grief or pain. But by the time you learn that, it's too late. You either had them, and they were nowhere near perfect, or you didn't have them, and they were so perfect you regret not having them.
For some strange reason, the times I remember most with my children were the times that weren't so good. The times when they were frustrated or in pain. We had plenty of good times, but the times that weren't so good stick in my memory more. When they tried to do something and couldn't do it. Or when they got hurt and needed first aid. Or when they didn't get what they expected to get.
I ran into similiar circumstances with my own two children, now adults. I never thought the values I taught them would blow right out the front door. It has not been too much of a rewarding experience, but a real learning experience for me. Now that I had them I wouldn't take it back. For anybody listening there is no guarantee no matter how you raise your children they will grow into what you had intended or even like you at all!
It is sad when that happens. Children will not always turn out the way you hope but it is terrible when they become people who you wouldn't like if you were strangers to begin with. My DH and I have some great memories with his daughter but looking back it was all about what she could get from us and that is heartbreaking.
Sometimes people just suck and sometimes they are your kids. It happens a lot. Seriously there are a lot of disgusting people in the world and yes they all have/had parents and it may not have anything to do with how you raised them.
We had two and I am an only child. Honestly, I rather liked be an only. We had two girls and snoopy people were always asking us when we were going to try to a boy. Nope, two is enough for us whatever gender. As my husband also used to add, "I happen to like girls." "What is wrong with GIRLS?" lol
Ironic part? My daughters are now adults. I have two Grandsons. My daughter and SIL have also decided no more. Yes, two boys and not "trying for a girl". My older daughter has no children.
BTW, money is not the only issue. You also have to be able to physically and emotionally raise them to adulthood. Not everyone is capable of doing that for a large size family.
My brother regrets not having children. By the time he realized he wanted them he then went through a divorce soon after. Why does he regret it? It's an unbelievable feeling to know you created a human being, the love is like no other. Teaching them about life, watching them grow up, grandchildren, etc.
Quote:
Originally Posted by hunterseat
Because members of our society aren't having enough children to even replace themselves we are heading towards extinction. the Radical Muslims are biding their time and having as many kids as possible.
So if I know that I can't afford to raise a child should I have one anyways and then go on welfare for the next 18 years in order to protect us from radical Muslims?
We'd do better with a smaller global population. People live longer, we use more resources, we destroy more natural resources.
Quote:
Originally Posted by sas318
Yes. Life was so boring and pointless before them. Now I have a purpose in life. It's not always fun, but overall, it's nice to have them around. They're elementary age.
I'm sorry you didn't feel you had a purpose in life before becoming a mother and I'm really happy you've found your purpose and are happy.
But it's 100% possible to not have kids and still have a purpose and a fulfilling life.
Quote:
Originally Posted by BrassTacksGal
In the US our birthrate is also low. We need more responsible families to have lots of kids. We need more kids in the pipeline to take care of our aging population. Replacement level in the US is 2.5 children for each family. Currently in the US the birthrate is 1.88, not close to replacement level. Our population in the US only increases because of immigration. We have more deaths in the US than births. That's not good.
Why? People live longer, use more resources, cost more money etc and more people means more workers and with technology and the rise of automation we already don't have enough jobs to go around... We're not being hurt by underpopulation.
Never wanted them, didn't have them, still don't want them. No regrets. Plenty of nieces/nephews around...then they go home.
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