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Old 12-22-2016, 11:08 AM
 
Location: Colorado
4,016 posts, read 2,694,903 times
Reputation: 7488

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Quote:
Originally Posted by swgirl926 View Post
Sorry, but this is the LAST thing that the OP needs to hear. You must be lucky enough to have never had someone with an entitlement mindset in your circle of friends or acquaintances. The statements about it being hard to find a job this time of year and potential homelessness are just a bunch of manipulative BS that these people are showering on the OP, no doubt, to wear out their welcome as long as they possibly can.

Bingo. They'll always have an excuse: "But it's Christmas!" "But it's winter!" "But it's Valentine's Day!" "It's President's Day!" "It's St. Patrick's Day!" They'll always have some excuse why the OP shouldn't boot them out.

And I believe the OP is in Florida. Most places in Florida seem to be in the 70's right now. I suspect the 'friend' and her 'mother' will somehow find a way to survive those harsh, frigid temperatures.
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Old 12-22-2016, 11:10 AM
 
22,284 posts, read 21,659,779 times
Reputation: 54735
You should change your friend demographic to something other than homeless people.
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Old 12-22-2016, 12:45 PM
 
Location: USA
3,568 posts, read 1,340,966 times
Reputation: 4221
Quote:
Originally Posted by cheryjohns View Post
Why on earth would you go to dinner with her????

You said you want her out. You said she doesn't pay for anything - and she has a history of having you pay the tab. This just doesn't make sense at all. I am starting to doubt this story. No one can be this naive. At this point, you are no longer the victim, since you are actively contributing to your "victimhood".
^^ This.

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Old 12-22-2016, 01:59 PM
 
524 posts, read 841,657 times
Reputation: 1033
So, any updates?
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Old 12-22-2016, 02:18 PM
 
Location: Somewhere in America
15,479 posts, read 15,564,516 times
Reputation: 28462
Quote:
Originally Posted by DaveinMtAiry View Post
I'm sure if they had the money they would pay you. You opened the door to your home knowing this situation, this should have been expected. If it were me I'd grin and bear it for a while longer, knowing that this is a terrible time of the year to find employment. Or you could make your friend and her mother homeless in the dead of winter. Your choice.
It's Florida! Hardly the dead of winter! We're not talking about Vermont. Even if we were, these are ADULTS!!! They COULD find a job anywhere - be a janitor, flip burgers, be a cashier, be a store greeter, work overnight stocking shelves, shovel cow manure - there ARE jobs out there! When you're facing homelessness, you take ANY job - heck you take 3 and WORK.

These people are USERS! There are lots of them out there. They look for a sap who will listen to their tales of whoa.....tales that they caused 100% on their own. People can only use them if you let them.
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Old 12-22-2016, 02:27 PM
 
Location: Southern California
12,713 posts, read 15,468,522 times
Reputation: 35512
I'm going to go against what I always say on citydata and I'm going to answer by only reading your thread title. Let's see if I can nail it using this method I usually don't recommend.

Your friend already ruined the friendship by putting you in this situation.
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Old 12-22-2016, 02:39 PM
 
1,190 posts, read 1,187,501 times
Reputation: 2320
Change the locks, problem solved!


Landlords also should never rent to friends/family either because as a "friend" you will gladly let them slide on late payments (or maybe NO payments) for a few months , right?


"but but but I thought you were my friend!!".
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Old 12-22-2016, 05:06 PM
 
Location: USA
3,568 posts, read 1,340,966 times
Reputation: 4221
Quote:
Originally Posted by LHS79 View Post
Change the locks, problem solved!


Landlords also should never rent to friends/family either because as a "friend" you will gladly let them slide on late payments (or maybe NO payments) for a few months , right?


"but but but I thought you were my friend!!".
NO! DON'T DO THIS.


Despite what some on this thread think, that's not how it works.

It is illegal to change the locks without going thru the legal eviction process. If you do, tenant can call police, who will force you to let the person in immediately, and you (landlord) could be penalized financially.

You MUST give tenant a written notice to vacate.

Of course, all this applies to people who actually want the person out. Not sure this applies to the OP in this thread.
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Old 12-22-2016, 11:02 PM
 
Location: super bizarre weather land
884 posts, read 1,169,265 times
Reputation: 1928
Quote:
Originally Posted by DaveinMtAiry View Post
I'm sure if they had the money they would pay you. You opened the door to your home knowing this situation, this should have been expected. If it were me I'd grin and bear it for a while longer, knowing that this is a terrible time of the year to find employment. Or you could make your friend and her mother homeless in the dead of winter. Your choice.
What?? No. If this girl and her mother end up homeless in the dead of winter (she's in Florida apparently, so I doubt it gets THAT cold), it will be entirely a result of their own actions (or inactions as it were), NOT the OP's fault. OP is not responsible for their bad choices. Do you think it is acceptable to live with someone and contribute absolutely nothing while at the same time making them pay for the privilege of you eating them out of house and home? These people are taking advantage. I do agree that OP should have expected this based on such behavior, but no point crying over it now--time for them to go.

Listen, it would be one thing if the roommate had suddenly gotten sick and then lost her job, or her house burned down, or she was escaping an abusive relationship--those are all things out of someone's control/understandable circumstances why you would need to stay with a friend. But even then you should be pitching in somehow. Even if you can't pay anything you should be trying to reduce OPs expenses, cooking, cleaning, doing dishes, SOMETHING!! Hell! My sister in law just visited for a weekend and she paid for stuff here and there and did dishes, none of which was expected mind you, she's just a generous person and wanted to be a good guest. I always offer to at least pay for dinner if I'm staying with a friend for a bit. And that's on vacation...if someone was willing to let me LIVE with them for free, OMG I would be bending over backwards to help out.
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Old 12-22-2016, 11:04 PM
 
Location: super bizarre weather land
884 posts, read 1,169,265 times
Reputation: 1928
Quote:
Originally Posted by ss20ts View Post
It's Florida! Hardly the dead of winter! We're not talking about Vermont. Even if we were, these are ADULTS!!! They COULD find a job anywhere - be a janitor, flip burgers, be a cashier, be a store greeter, work overnight stocking shelves, shovel cow manure - there ARE jobs out there! When you're facing homelessness, you take ANY job - heck you take 3 and WORK.

These people are USERS! There are lots of them out there. They look for a sap who will listen to their tales of whoa.....tales that they caused 100% on their own. People can only use them if you let them.
Bingo! And when OP finally does get them out of her life, someone else will take them in. That's always how that works. Until that person gets sick of their excuses too.
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