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How weird, I would never do laundry when on holiday. The only time I considered it was when I was travelling for 3 weeks and I was running low on clean clothes. In the end I just bought new clothes because I didn't want to waste vacation time doing laundry lol
This is a family member who is 36, married, good job, 2 kids under 5. Whenever he visits he asks to use the washer/dryer on the day they leave. I have never had anyone, relative or friend, ask to use our washer and dryer to do their clothes.
Honestly, it really bugs me. I do enjoy their visits, but seriously, I already have to cook and clean up after them, plus change the sheets and towels and wash them, so I have to do their laundry too? To be clear, I plan for their visit and create daily menus, have their beverages on hand, what the kids like to eat etc. I just don't get this quirk of doing their laundry before they leave. They have their own house with a washer/dryer and his wife doesn't work so ???
Am I wrong to feel this way?
So wait, are they asking to use your washer and dryer, or are they asking you to do their laundry for them? That's two very different requests that you're conflating as the same.
IMO it's common courtesy to offer the use of the washer and dryer to a guest who's stayed more than 3 days or so, so that they don't have to travel with a suitcase full of dirty clothes, but the actual act of laundering their clothes is their responsibility. Next time they ask, you can clearly absolve yourself of any obligation to do it yourself by saying "the washer and dryer are in the basement (or wherever they are), the detergent and fabric softener are in the cabinet above (or wherever they are), help yourself." No skin off your nose except maybe 75 cents worth of electricity and degergent.
I often do it on vacation, esp at a family member or friend's house before I leave (if I'm not headed straight home), so it's perfectly normal to me & many of my houseguests (family or good friends) do the same here, but I would never ask someone else to do the laundry FOR me.
If my guest is not going straight home after leaving my house, I would certainly offer for him to do his laundry. He might not have the chance to get clean clothes on the rest of his trip otherwise. But if he's flying or driving straight home, I see no need for him to get laundry done. But since you've already been sending him home with clean clothes, I see no way to stop it now without seeming rude. Just do as others have said and show him where everything is, then go into the other room and do something else.
Well I guess I'm in the minority. I still think it's odd. I usually have to do it because he doesn't have the same machines as we do. I start it and then put them in the dryer. He folds them. I never say anything or give off the impression that I don't want to do it. It just irks me I guess.
Probably stems from the time we went to visit them (a planned visit) and there was literally NO FOOD or beverages in the house. In the frig. there were the usual condiments but no food. We were travelling with our young daughter at the time (12) and so we went to the store and bought food/drinks. We were also expected to treat everyone out to lunch/dinner since the wife doesn't cook. When word got out to the family that we were going to brunch, 15 people were going to come expecting us to foot the bill. When we said it was going to have to be dutch (everyone pays for themselves), all of sudden it was suggested going over to another relatives house and she was cooking breakfast! So I think for me it's kind of like he's just cheap.
If my guest is not going straight home after leaving my house, I would certainly offer for him to do his laundry. He might not have the chance to get clean clothes on the rest of his trip otherwise. But if he's flying or driving straight home, I see no need for him to get laundry done. But since you've already been sending him home with clean clothes, I see no way to stop it now without seeming rude. Just do as others have said and show him where everything is, then go into the other room and do something else.
That's probably what I'll have to do. But like I just recently posted, I think it all stems from a visit to their house and we ended up footing the bill for everything and it wasn't fun. I mean, if you know you're having house guests you have to at least plan for meals and have the basics on hand. But the wife walks to Starbucks every day for coffee/treats and hates cooking. That's fine, but company shouldn't have to buy their own food to stay at your house.
Obviously, the issue is bigger than these two examples. Like Clemencia, I would also like to know what your relationship is with this guy.
Even if you turn on the washing machine and throw stuff in the dryer and turn that on, if he's taking the stuff out and folding it (to me, the most irritating and time consuming part of doing laundry), what's the big deal? Just how often are these visits taking place? Every month or once a year?
How many times have you stayed at his house? Now you know what the drill is there, either buck up and roll with it or stay in a motel. And just how did this extended clan let you know that you would be paying for everyone's meal?
If this is your husband's son from a prior marriage, what does your husband say?
Ew! You touch their dirty clothing? OMG. I would be mortified to think someone was touching my undies.
How complicated is a washing machine to operate???
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