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Old 05-01-2017, 07:41 PM
 
7,314 posts, read 11,461,457 times
Reputation: 8087

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Quote:
Originally Posted by Chriz Brown View Post
Anyone experience getting stabbed in the back by co-workers as you advance more in your career?

Its finally sinking in to me that you cannot have friends at work unless you want to stay at a low level.

Every time I rise up a little I experience backstabbing, sabotage or other nonsense from co-workers. Often people whom I had good relationships with before. Its very disappointing and sad.

I have a buddy experiencing the same thing on his job.
Well. If you're advancing, then their sabotage can't be going that well...

Just do your best and be the better man and help others out and whatever happens happens. If you lose your job, you lose your job.

I mean, do you wake up on Monday mornings loving to go into your job anyway?
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Old 05-01-2017, 08:46 PM
 
Location: Spurs country. "Go, Spurs, Go!"
3,361 posts, read 3,920,970 times
Reputation: 8655
Welcome to "real life." Life as an adult is very different from being a child in this "everyone gets a trophy" world. Hope you raise your current or future children as realists, not snowflakes.
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Old 05-02-2017, 01:44 AM
 
Location: At the Lake (in Texas)
2,072 posts, read 2,023,992 times
Reputation: 5032
Quote:
Originally Posted by stava View Post
It's great that you've had such positive experiences at work. But you cannot translate your personal experience to everyone else's. You are not in OP's shoes and all you're doing is assuming that your perception is the reality for everyone. Do you see how short-sighted that is? Workplace backstabbing is a REAL THING, and just because you personally haven't experienced it certainly doesn't mean it doesn't exist.
I totally agree with you Stava...Minivandriver, your experience is not universal and OP's experience is, frankly, much more common. A sad but very real problem in the business world. At ALL levels.
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Old 05-02-2017, 03:23 AM
Status: "When in doubt, don't televise your doubt(s)." (set 1 hour ago)
 
8,520 posts, read 298,400 times
Reputation: 186
Quote:
Originally Posted by Katana49 View Post
It happens, unfortunately. I had many jobs where I was well liked, got along with my peers and upper management, etc. Never had any problems advancing, because my work stood on its own.

Then I started working for another company. A company I really liked, to be honest. But, there was indeed a culture of distrust and backstabbing. The people who were promoted and advanced usually had some dirt on upper management and were untouchable for fear of a lawsuit.

Others were just nasty, spiteful people. I had one boss who was a no-nonsense sort. Two of my coworkers (who were both friends with each other) hated me, and they did whatever they could to make me look bad. This went on for 6+ months where they were constantly going to my boss and complaining about me. He finally told them to mind their own business and worry about their own job. He told me all this after the fact. Problem was, when he moved on and we got a new Director, the new Director wasn't as smart as the old one... They turned her against me, and then the writing was on the wall. I probably should have gotten out as soon as the old boss left, knowing what I knew, but I liked my job.

Didn't take my two coworkers long to turn the Director against me, and when a round of layoffs came, I was one of them, even though I had seniority on the team.
Human nature at its' Worst. A nasty "turn of events" indeed!
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Old 05-02-2017, 03:41 AM
Status: "When in doubt, don't televise your doubt(s)." (set 1 hour ago)
 
8,520 posts, read 298,400 times
Reputation: 186
Quote:
Originally Posted by hunterseat View Post
We have one particular nasty person in my office - thankfully we work in different departments. We're all on to her now. She tries to corner the new people and feed them hate but we try to intercept.

She's also filed numerous grievances and lawsuits (yep, never won them - I think they gave her a couple thousand once to try to shut her up and she complained). Pathetic.
Some people are so "Low". It's probably a poor "upbringing" thing...coupled with jealousy and low self-esteem issues.
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Old 05-02-2017, 09:33 PM
 
2,696 posts, read 1,873,024 times
Reputation: 1856
Quote:
Originally Posted by jobaba View Post
Well. If you're advancing, then their sabotage can't be going that well...

Just do your best and be the better man and help others out and whatever happens happens. If you lose your job, you lose your job.

I mean, do you wake up on Monday mornings loving to go into your job anyway?
I wake up Monday preferring to go to my job over looking for a new job and starting all over.
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Old 05-03-2017, 10:33 AM
 
1,395 posts, read 531,232 times
Reputation: 2551
What about the ones who talk about how they dislike another co-worker but, you come in the next day and they are acting like best friends? I really don't like people who do that. They seem to be the type who will start talking crap about someone just to get you to join in so they can run back and tell that person what you said.
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Old 05-03-2017, 11:41 AM
 
11,085 posts, read 10,116,518 times
Reputation: 20478
I still maintain office friendships that I made before retirement. The rest? Well, let me say it this way. There were some who would talk trash to me about a co-worker and I thought if they could gossip to me about them, what are they saying to them about me?

There was one incident where a co-worker accused me of being rude to one of her family members when they called into the office. After proving that I did no such thing and that this was nothing more than a witch hunt, I asked the boss to make it clear to this woman that if she ever did anything like that again, I would be filing a grievance with management, for harassment. It never happened again.

I don't know why more people can't understand that the workplace is a place you go to collect a paycheck so you can enjoy the other parts of your life.
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Old 05-03-2017, 03:59 PM
 
Location: North Carolina
1,818 posts, read 2,178,499 times
Reputation: 2772
I think that people should literally be psychologically vetted before being hired. There needs to be a test administered as part of the hiring process to ALL potential employees, to weed out the toxics (and worse). A required part of every background check.
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Old 05-03-2017, 11:37 PM
 
Location: Spurs country. "Go, Spurs, Go!"
3,361 posts, read 3,920,970 times
Reputation: 8655
This is already in place, and I refused to do a psychological profile when applying for a retail position one holiday season, via a computer, and was hired without doing it. Interview me in person and get a "feel" for me as a competent employee, and take my background history into account from my resume. I don't play these "mind games."

Everyone has a personality, some are nice, others are not-so-nice. From an employers point of view, employees are there to do a job, not to make and form friendships.

ETA: I am from a different generation than the current work force, so I have to concede that in this job market, the future hires have a different work environment than what I had. Maybe Stava has a good point.
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