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basically if your husband is invited your invited.when I invite my friends to my house gatherings they already know by default they can bring their girlfriends or wives without me saying
It's deliberate. You always allow that whoever you invite can bring a date. Maybe they have a reason to keep it small..... then don't go. It could be a cost thing or a venue thing. We had a small reception dinner down in the Keys, and it was in a small room. I doubt we could have fit one more person in there. I guess you could ask "why no date" if you want to be clear.
Okay, I guess it's time to haul out ol' Emily Post for a whole new generation.
But my own Millennial daughter just got married this past Saturday, and she certainly knew better than to invite only half a married couple...or for that matter, even only half of a "committed" relationship.
OP - Decline the invite and send a book on manners and etiquette as the wedding gift.
Yes, I agree that it is rude, and it has happened to me twice.
The first time was when I had a falling out with the bride about three months before the wedding, but the groom was still on good terms with my husband. However, in that case, although I think it was something of a slap in the face to me, I honestly didn't care!
The second time was the wedding of my husband's work friend, and the reception/dinner was held at a VERY expensive restaurant, and I just figured that they just didn't want to pay an extra $200 or so for someone they didn't even know (me). (I still thought it would have been better not to invite my husband, either, though.)
Marriage is meant to bring people together, not divide them but that's exactly what this wedding did and there are still hurt feelings and fractured relationships to this day.
I tell you what, that would have been a REAL small wedding if anyone had tried that stunt in my family...
Quote:
Originally Posted by bell235
my mom was just invited to a co-worker's kid's wedding without my dad.
i thought it was strange at first but i dont know it kind of makes sense if they are trying to cut costs for headcount. and my mom is the person who is friends with the co-worker, not my dad. but i guess family is a different situation.
No it isn't. If you can't afford to invite both spouses, don't invite either.
I tell you what, that would have been a REAL small wedding if anyone had tried that stunt in my family...
My husband declined his invite. Unfortunately this sibling is the golden child who can do no wrong so instead of the other family members being angry with him for excluding people, they defended his decision and shut down those who dared to question it.
My husband did give them a generous gift. Never got a thank you card.
It forever changed the way I feel about my in-laws. I lost all respect.
Fact is that etiquette and thoughtfulness are gone with things like weddings and showers. It used to be that weddings were a way of celebrating and bringing family and friends together. Today it's just about the bride and groom and what suits them. Used to be that if you had budget concerns you would lower your standards for your big day to include everyone. Now I hear of couples who have lavish destination weddings that exclude most of their loved ones. People used to care about rules of etiquette but no more. Now people throw their own showers and include in their invitations where they are registered. All of these things are tacky to those of us who are of an older generation but it seems the younger crowd doesn't care. It is very rude for the OP to be excluded from the wedding invitation.
Fact is that etiquette and thoughtfulness are gone with things like weddings and showers. It used to be that weddings were a way of celebrating and bringing family and friends together. Today it's just about the bride and groom and what suits them. Used to be that if you had budget concerns you would lower your standards for your big day to include everyone. Now I hear of couples who have lavish destination weddings that exclude most of their loved ones. People used to care about rules of etiquette but no more. Now people throw their own showers and include in their invitations where they are registered. All of these things are tacky to those of us who are of an older generation but it seems the younger crowd doesn't care. It is very rude for the OP to be excluded from the wedding invitation.
Yep. The whole, "it's my special day and I can do whatever I want" thing has gone way too far.
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