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Old 05-29-2017, 10:30 AM
 
Location: 🇬🇧 In jolly old London! 🇬🇧
15,672 posts, read 8,328,819 times
Reputation: 12405

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Quote:
Originally Posted by jobaba View Post
I would also go as far as to say most people who are prodigious posters on CD forum, over 5,000 posts (ahem ) probably don't have a lot of friends.

The time spent on here could be spent on the phone or on Facebook maintaining real friendships and posting pictures of what you did over the weekend.
Yes it's possible and especially for the less outgoing person however me for example I've never ever used a laptop to log on to CD and always my iPhone so that enables me to have a quick look if I'm out and about whether that's on a night out with friends or waiting for a bus etc.

I can assure you I've plenty of friends and am as outgoing socially as anyone, infact I'm try to kill time now waiting for a cab to go out tonight! which I'd suspect is the same for many on here
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Old 05-29-2017, 10:39 AM
 
7,326 posts, read 11,489,945 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Londoncowboy30 View Post
Yes it's possible and especially for the less outgoing person however me for example I've never ever used a laptop to log on to CD and always my iPhone so that enables me to have a quick look if I'm out and about whether that's on a night out with friends or waiting for a bus etc.

I can assure you I've plenty of friends and am as outgoing socially as anyone, infact I'm try to kill time now waiting for a cab to go out tonight! which I'd suspect is the same for many on here
Well, you could have even MORE friends if you were on Facebook instead.

You don't have to justify yourself man. I didn't mean it in a negative way. I, myself, in case you hadn't noticed, have more than 5,000 posts.
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Old 05-29-2017, 10:41 AM
 
Location: Philadelphia, PA
2,133 posts, read 976,899 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by mej210390 View Post
The question says it all, what factors and reasons are of some having more friends that others?
If you possess a skill (carpentry, plumbing, etc) or are in a position to provide others with a service or goods, you'll have more friends than the average schlub.
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Old 05-29-2017, 10:56 AM
 
Location: Midwest
4,215 posts, read 7,114,054 times
Reputation: 7057
Because.
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Old 05-29-2017, 11:00 AM
 
Location: 🇬🇧 In jolly old London! 🇬🇧
15,672 posts, read 8,328,819 times
Reputation: 12405
Quote:
Originally Posted by jobaba View Post
Well, you could have even MORE friends if you were on Facebook instead.

You don't have to justify yourself man. I didn't mean it in a negative way. I, myself, in case you hadn't noticed, have more than 5,000 posts.
Haha I'm not even on FB! And still mr popular!

Oh no you're fine I wasn't being combative or anything just adding my 2p

Thank you for the reply
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Old 05-29-2017, 11:41 AM
 
902 posts, read 522,843 times
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First, you need to define "friend". For introverts a friend is someone who is a kindred spirit, who "gets" you without you having to try so hard. As an introvert I have a few friends with whom I feel comfortable. The rest of the people I know fall into the "friendly acquaintance" category which is fine with me. My DH is an extrovert. He has many more friends but really few who are deep as far as a connection.

I do believe social interactions are like the animal kingdom. People are drawn to others who seem to have it all--good looks, financial success, solid family, very active social/recreational life. People with many friends are not negative or clingy. In essence they don't "need" you which is why people are drawn to them. Others want to be their friend subconsciously because they want to be part of all of the positivity in their lives. People who are wanting friends but can't seem to make any tend to give off a negative vibe of neediness. I often read on CD people who want a friend almost as a counselor with whom they can share their deepest thoughts and issues. Truth is most people don't desire that type of friendship. They don't want a friend who dumps on them or needs them too much. That is why they are drawn to people who already have many friends. It's a vicious cycle in a way.
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Old 05-29-2017, 02:08 PM
 
801 posts, read 393,660 times
Reputation: 697
Quote:
Originally Posted by jonesg View Post
My friend has 5K friends on facebook, I have about 12.
I've got more real friends.
Your real friends can be counted on one hand.
I forgot the question..
Yup you have nothing to be ashamed of. Real friends are what matters. Theres a lot of people that feel like it strokes their ego if they have a massive friends list "Look at how popular I am everybody!". NOBODY has 5k real friends. The word "friend" is applied way too easily in Facebook.

An small example of differences between introverts and extroverts; A while back I was driving around doing errands, and I was very hungry so I went into a non-fancy restaurant alone and ate. Later when I told a friend about my day she said "Oh, you ate out alone? That sounds sad and depressing! I would have called up some people and had them join me." To me it was just an issue of wanting to relax and eat a good meal to fill my stomach. To some, almost everything has to be turned into a social activity. Whatever floats their boat I guess.
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Old 05-29-2017, 04:18 PM
 
Location: Clarence, NY
528 posts, read 187,209 times
Reputation: 639
Well, if you like being alone you're probably not gonna have as many friends as a "social butterfly." Some don't have time for everything, as they can't meet more obligations added onto their lives then now. It all depends


SSeligman
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Old 05-29-2017, 04:21 PM
Status: "Stranger than Fiction" (set 18 days ago)
 
8,574 posts, read 10,776,860 times
Reputation: 12567
Some people are more introverted and some are more extroverted. Period. The way you're hard wired is the way it is.
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Old 05-29-2017, 07:29 PM
 
Location: Midwest
4,215 posts, read 7,114,054 times
Reputation: 7057
If you have five real, actual, true friends in one lifetime you're doing well.

I don't mean social media friends, or people you hang with.
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