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Old 06-02-2017, 07:58 PM
 
Location: Georgia
4,562 posts, read 4,101,724 times
Reputation: 15768

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When we lived in China, one of the first things we were told in our orientation was "no tips". We saw it often -- American tourists who would unconsciously leave a tip, only to have it graciously returned to the tourist. We were leaving at the same time as one couple who had left their change on the table, and the server chased them out onto the street, crying, "Sir, sir! Your change!" The man tried to explain, "Oh, no, that's for you," and I had to quietly tell him "no tipping is allowed -- he's afraid of being accused of stealing your change." Ahh . . . "When in Rome", indeed.
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Old 06-02-2017, 08:04 PM
 
Location: Georgia
4,562 posts, read 4,101,724 times
Reputation: 15768
Quote:
Originally Posted by brownbagg View Post
i dont understand the tipping part, yes the resturants are cheap but why does one get 20% of a buill to bring me one glass of tea. some waitress, yes i know its a hard job but make damn good money, couple hundred a night in un reported income.

look i just dont understand why i should give $10 tip for one glass of $2 tea. I dont eat high price places but I alway leave couple dollar. i just dont understand the 20%
Well, there's your problem . . . I guess Common Core didn't teach people how to figure percentages. $10 is NOT 20% of a $2 glass of tea. Let's do the math, shall we? $2 for a glass of tea = $.40 for a 20% tip. Eh, round it up to $.50, you probably don't have $.40, but you probably have a couple of quarters. If you are taking up a table in a restaurant or cafe, enjoying the ambiance, etc. and a server brings you a glass of tea, and keeps it refilled, and checks back with you frequently to see if anything else has caught your fancy, etc., what's $.50 to you? Otherwise, go to McDonalds and get a $1 cup of tea and don't worry about a tip.

It used to drive my daughter crazy when she worked at a cafe/coffee/dessert shop that had late hours - owner would not allow the restaurant to close as long as a customer was enjoying their food. One night, a couple wandered in 15 minutes before closing (1 am) and ordered coffee. They stayed for TWO HOURS -- just with coffee. My daughter had to stay at the restaurant until 3 AM, refilling their coffee, etc. They left at 3 AM -- with NO tip. Two hours of service. Not even a crummy dime. I asked if they were European, and she said, "Not unless they learned English in Alabama . . . "
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Old 06-02-2017, 08:11 PM
 
983 posts, read 513,533 times
Reputation: 1580
Here's an interesting article about women that don't tip:

The Tipping Point: Why Women Are Crappy Tippers - Purple Clover

I have to agree. I am a woman that has waitressed before and I have noticed this as well.
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Old 06-02-2017, 08:14 PM
 
Location: SW Florida
10,319 posts, read 4,884,746 times
Reputation: 21735
My late husband was a lousy tipper. When I realized while dating that he was still thinking 10% was a fine tip, I just started leaving the tip as "my part". He wasn't rude about it, but he was raised during the end of the depression and knew what it was like to go hungry and wear shoes with cardboard in them because the soles had worn through so I cut him a little slack and he eventually was educated to the fact that servers make some ridiculous hourly wage.


These days if I was on a first date with someone and they didn't leave a tip or left a crummy tip when we had great service, there wouldn't be a second date.
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Old 06-02-2017, 08:19 PM
 
3,196 posts, read 1,817,939 times
Reputation: 8438
Quote:
Originally Posted by saltfishcake View Post
What is wrong with charging for the price of a meal instead of depending on the generosity of diners?
Nothing except that many diners find an increase in menu prices to be... unpalatable.
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Old 06-02-2017, 10:13 PM
 
Location: Wake County, NC
1,169 posts, read 1,477,140 times
Reputation: 1783
We occasionally eat at a cafeteria in town. I see a lot of people leave without tipping. The servers really don't serve our meals, but they always make sure we have our drinks refilled, plates removed, etc. Since I use a cane, there is always someone to take my tray to a table. We have our favorite, and she takes good care of us. We make sure to tip her well, and we hand it to her in person. (Could be why she is so good to us!)
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Old 06-03-2017, 02:39 AM
 
Location: Garbage, NC
3,124 posts, read 2,053,138 times
Reputation: 8120
I waited tables for years in my late teens and early 20s. Unless I just got like one cup of coffee or one beer or something, I always tip a minimum of $5. Above that, I tip 20-25% the vast majority of the time.

If I tip less, it's because the server screwed up. As someone who "knows the business," I kinda know what is and isn't the server's fault. I'll never blame my server if my food isn't good, although a good server DOES know to check plates before taking them out (obviously my steak's doneness, etc. is not my server's fault, but bringing me a plate with completely wrong sides kinda is). I'll never blame my server if I see that he/she is busy with a fussy table or a huge party. I will, however, blame my server if he/she is cutting up with other employees or standing right outside the windows smoking and talking on the phone when I need something.

Even when I tip "less," it's usually still at least 10 or 15%. And that's rare. Very rare.

My mother-in-law, bless her heart, always insists on taking us out to eat and paying the bill. The problem is that she is a HORRIBLE tipper, even when she "loves" the server and brags about how awesome he/she is. I think it's her age...she's used to $2 being a good tip, so it's just hard for her to even imagine in her old age (she's in her late 70's) leaving a $20 bill. I always try to pick up the slack and put some money on the table when she can't see it, but the last time we went out to eat, I didn't have any cash on me, and I felt bad because she left our (semi-good, not great) server a $4 tip on a $60 meal. :/

All of that said, I think it is 100 percent inappropriate for a server to EVER bring up the tip to a customer. Period. "Was my service okay? I'm just asking because you didn't leave a tip" is not appropriate. Following customers to their cars to talk about tips? Not okay. Period. Maybe I'm "old school," but that's how I feel. I'm surprised some people don't lose their jobs over stuff like this. As much as I hate the idea of a server getting "stiffed," I hate the idea of a customer being stalked into the parking lot even more. Also, I wonder if an employee who feels like it's okay to do this type of thing was actually a truly good server or if he/she felt entitled to a tip for mediocre service...

I also do not think it's okay to give a customer crappy service the next time that they come in just because they left you a crappy tip or stiffed you last time. At the end of the day, you are representing the restaurant that you work for. If the place becomes known for crappy service, that affects you, the other employees, the owner, etc. Plus. the person might have forgot or was on a budget last time -- or maybe went out to eat with a crappy tipper like my MIL -- and has every intention of tipping well/making up for it this time, but maybe not if you give them bad service on purpose

Suck it up! You already know that for every customer who leaves a 5 or 10 percent tip, you'll give five more customers who leave 15 or 20 percent or more. My numbers always more than balanced out in the end.

Another thing that I don't like is all of the articles, videos, etc. that are hitting social media nowadays in which servers are complaining about just about every type of service that their customers ask for....they roll their eyes or make a scene because a customer asks for extra ranch dressing or extra lemons or something. I see things like this and find it annoying...it's like servers think they are so high and mighty these days that they are "above" doing such things. Sorry. That's your job. Yes, some customers are annoying and high-maintenance, but most are not. You coasted through the last three tables with minimal work and 20 percent tips, so now you're pissed that you finally ended up with a table that wants a little more attention? Boohoo. Didn't you know that "serving" your customers and bringing them stuff that they want would be part of the job?

It's been about 7-8 years now since I waited tables, but I know that I made pretty good money, believe it or not. Servers want to cry on social media that "they only made $2.13 an hour" but also want to defend themselves when they are told to "get a real job, then." Let's be real: if you were really making $2.13 an hour, you would quit and get a job in fast food or something. When the federal minimum wage was $5.15 an hour, I made an average of $10-$12 an hour waiting tables, and sometimes much, much more. I wasn't getting rich, and neither are today's servers, but a good server at a halfway decent restaurant is probably making double the minimum wage and then some.

TLDR; I waited tables for years, I respect the profession, and I tip well. I think servers whine too much about tips and having to serve customers, though.
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Old 06-03-2017, 02:56 AM
 
Location: Tucson for awhile longer
8,872 posts, read 13,564,810 times
Reputation: 29033
Quote:
Originally Posted by hertfordshire View Post
I definitely would no longer be friends with this person. Not only because she doesn't tip, but because she's rude as hell about it.
I wouldn't be friends with her for both reasons. The business of restaurant owners not paying wait staff a living wage and expecting customers to subsidize their cheapness is absurd to me. But it currently is standard practice in this country. I tip 20% as long as service was normal, more for breakfast waitpersons if they are hustling my coffee and all the little extras people want in the AM. I wouldn't dine with people at sit-down places if they didn't tip. I have some family members who undertip (you can't pick your family), so I compensate for their cheapness. I've gone back to the table under some pretense and left cash on the table many times in my life to make up for my rude relatives.

By the way, I have not seen the oft-reported phenomenon of women supposedly being worse tippers than men. My observation is that, whatever the sex, the best tippers are people who have been service workers themselves.
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Old 06-03-2017, 06:52 AM
 
965 posts, read 511,101 times
Reputation: 1895
Quote:
Originally Posted by Jukesgrrl View Post
I wouldn't be friends with her for both reasons. The business of restaurant owners not paying wait staff a living wage and expecting customers to subsidize their cheapness is absurd to me. But it currently is standard practice in this country. I tip 20% as long as service was normal, more for breakfast waitpersons if they are hustling my coffee and all the little extras people want in the AM. I wouldn't dine with people at sit-down places if they didn't tip. I have some family members who undertip (you can't pick your family), so I compensate for their cheapness. I've gone back to the table under some pretense and left cash on the table many times in my life to make up for my rude relatives.

By the way, I have not seen the oft-reported phenomenon of women supposedly being worse tippers than men. My observation is that, whatever the sex, the best tippers are people who have been service workers themselves.
I agree with all of this, and have done the same I would cut ties then, and there with that person, and maybe in public. That is so ugly, and nasty. I wouldn't want anyone like that in my life ever.

Having been a server in a previous life, I just took it as it came. Life is too short to worry about it, or to even count tips -except what you have to claim to the IRS,that was a drag.
Scoop it into your apron and carry on.

If I got 10% tips or less (just eyeballed or on a CC), I didn't take offense I always figured they didn't know any better.
Tipping less does not tell the server they did a crap job. They just assume you are cheap, or don't know any better. Still.... you are gone, so they shouldn't care much. Unless the recognize you for next time.

If (rarely ever - and just someone biatchy - not busy, or inexperienced) I have had a horrible server I find the manager and let them know. I let them know politely, and specifically.

It is my money, and since I was in the business I feel they should know the situation from a customers POV, so that they can correct it. If it was that bad, there would also be no tip, but not without explanation. I also do this for great service, always. I will find the manager or supervisor, and also tip well. And always 20%+. imo the tip is for the experience, not the food.

Seriously, tipping does NOT punish or tell a server how they did. It just tells the server how you tip. Unless it is a new server, like the one someone mentioned who actually asked a customer...
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Old 06-03-2017, 07:00 AM
 
Location: SW Florida
10,319 posts, read 4,884,746 times
Reputation: 21735
I don't get the "women are the worst tippers" either. I'm on a budget and don't go out to eat often but when I do I always, always tip 20%. The only time I wouldn't tip 20% would be if I had horrible service and I guess I've lucked out because I can't remember truly awful service in many years.


Depending on the restaurant you are working at I know someone who brings home around $100 a night during season here in Florida and she only works there 3-4 nights a week in addition to her daytime job.
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