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Old 06-01-2017, 07:09 PM
 
Location: Sugarland
13,740 posts, read 12,639,862 times
Reputation: 16579

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Quote:
Originally Posted by warhorse78 View Post
I've had these friends that I have been hanging out for the past year, but last weekend, we all went out of town together for the first time. Our first stop was to a dine in restaurant, and at the end, I paid my bill via credit card and gave the normal 20% tip. As we were about to leave, the waitress came back to my friend, and asked if she was happy with her service. My friend nodded and said it was good. The waitress then said my friend gave her the exact amount on the bill. That's when I caught on that she didn't leave a tip. I asked my friend if she was going to leave a tip, and she outright told the waitress no. That she don't believe in tipping. Serving her was the waitresses job and she should need tips. I told my friend most service workers work at no more that 2.15 and hour, and my friend told the waitress point blank "well, that's not my problem that your are so stupid enough to work for a job that pays minimum wage. So, good-bye"

I was so embarrassed and very upset with how my friend acted. I haven't talked to her too much since then, and wonder, has anyone else had this issue with friends who refused to tip? Or all of a sudden, short on money and need help in paying their bill (which has happened to me too before)
Servers shouldn't be asking for tips. Can't they get fired for that?
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Old 06-01-2017, 07:17 PM
 
6,073 posts, read 2,798,708 times
Reputation: 15366
Your friend was valid in concept. Less remarkable in how it was relayed to the cordial staff.
Social shaming a fellow human being because they chose to live by a certain principle. Wow!
I feel zero shame. I assure you what I pay on the bill is what is it.
So now it's the tippers are somehow a grade above others? Get real. Tipping is voluntary .
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Old 06-01-2017, 07:20 PM
 
Location: Florida
153 posts, read 84,858 times
Reputation: 481
I can tolerate cheap friends, but not downright cruel friends. Don't blame you for backing off.
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Old 06-01-2017, 07:23 PM
 
12,871 posts, read 6,170,071 times
Reputation: 10739
Quote:
Originally Posted by warhorse78 View Post
I've had these friends that I have been hanging out for the past year, but last weekend, we all went out of town together for the first time. Our first stop was to a dine in restaurant, and at the end, I paid my bill via credit card and gave the normal 20% tip. As we were about to leave, the waitress came back to my friend, and asked if she was happy with her service. My friend nodded and said it was good. The waitress then said my friend gave her the exact amount on the bill. That's when I caught on that she didn't leave a tip. I asked my friend if she was going to leave a tip, and she outright told the waitress no. That she don't believe in tipping. Serving her was the waitresses job and she should need tips. I told my friend most service workers work at no more that 2.15 and hour, and my friend told the waitress point blank "well, that's not my problem that your are so stupid enough to work for a job that pays minimum wage. So, good-bye"

I was so embarrassed and very upset with how my friend acted. I haven't talked to her too much since then, and wonder, has anyone else had this issue with friends who refused to tip? Or all of a sudden, short on money and need help in paying their bill (which has happened to me too before)
^^^^What a horrible thing to say to the waitress! Anyone who would treat a server like that --- especially one who gave good service---would no longer be a friend of mine!

When I was in college, I used to work part-time in the dorm cafeteria---I also used to eat there when I wasn't working. Diners were expected to return their trays to a conveyor belt. I was friends with someone who refused to return her tray, and called her out on it. Some of my other friends also did so. She felt that she didn't need to return her tray. I stopped eating meals with her after that.

Quote:
Originally Posted by CatsinSnow View Post
See I have to disagree with you on that. Unless service at a restaurant is awful, I live the standard 15% tip (and this is regardless of whether the bill was $10 or $30). If the service is great, I'll do 20%. If the service was just okay I might do 15% or 10% based on my mood.

I've only not left a tip when my friend and I not only had an awful waiter, but a waiter who ignored us, was actually rude to us, and who dropped water all over me saying "It's just water".

IMO I'm reasonable with tips but some of my approaches may not follow the rules of "etiquette". I do not tip when picking up food whether it's pizza, BBQ or Chinese. I'm sorry, not tipping for just myself when all you do is put some napkins and 2 paper plates and 2 utensil set in a bag. I also don't follow the always pay 15%-20% for beauty treatments thing since it doesn't address time spent. I actually posted about this before. I started getting what they call microdermabrasian treatments on my face. The whole procedure takes less than 15 minutes. If her price is $55, I do feel between $8.25-$11 is too high simply due to the time so I'll give her $5. If I "upgrade" to get a mask on for $10, then I will make it a couple bucks more. I'm just not comfortable using the 15-10% tipping rule in the beauty industry. I did however get my hair done yesterday. My hair dresser spends hours on my hair and super thorough with getting every piece of hair colored. Her price is also reasonable at $85 and she usually tries to make time for me if I call her at the last minute. I have always left her a 20% tip. There's also massages which I don't get too often. The cheaper (I'm talking about non Thai places) places may be something like $65 for 60 minutes but a more "upscale" place (treatment is actually no different from each other) it may be something like $100 for 60 minutes. I'll leave a flat $10. I may leave more though if the person actually went above and beyond or who didn't try to "cheat" me somehow. I had a massage a month ago for 90 minutes. I was not late for my appointment. I was going to the leave the guy a 20% tip because he seemed like a nice guy, listened to what I wanted, and it was a great massage. When I checked the clock, I realized I only had 75 minutes of massage time. That right there was reason enough to leave him less of a tip. I ended up reviewing him on Yelp giving him 3 or 4 stars saying it would have been a perfect score had he actually given me the 90 minute massage that I paid for. He texted me the next day and said he feels bad and didn't realize he cut my massage short (I'm not sure how you could really not pay attention since as a massage therapist, you have back to back appointments and well, kind of need to be mindful of the time). He did offer me a complimentary 60 minute massage but I'm not sure or not if I want to come back.
Per the bolded, do you live in the US? If so, the standard tip is 20%. Recently, I read that in NYC it is now 25%.

Is 25% the new standard for tipping? Depends where you eat - TODAY.com

^^^^From the article:

Nowadays, 15 percent isn’t an average tip – it’s a way of registering displeasure with the service.
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Old 06-01-2017, 07:35 PM
 
11,678 posts, read 14,373,153 times
Reputation: 19062
I don't think I've eaten out with anyone who's a bad tipper. Usually if I'm out with a friend, we compare tips so neither of us is the cheapskate. It would embarrass me if I associated with someone who didn't tip at all.

I am an over-tipper when service is good; 30% isn't unheard of. I like the idea of putting a smile on the face of someone who works hard for very little gratitude.
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Old 06-01-2017, 07:39 PM
 
11,678 posts, read 14,373,153 times
Reputation: 19062
Quote:
Originally Posted by BOS2IAD View Post
Per the bolded, do you live in the US? If so, the standard tip is 20%. Recently, I read that in NYC it is now 25%.

Is 25% the new standard for tipping? Depends where you eat - TODAY.com

^^^^From the article:

Nowadays, 15 percent isnít an average tip Ė itís a way of registering displeasure with the service.
Right or not, I don't agree with this. I think 15% is a good tip.

Pretty soon it's going to be 20, 30, 50%. When does it stop?
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Old 06-01-2017, 08:01 PM
 
5,532 posts, read 5,957,003 times
Reputation: 3155
"I don't believe in tipping":

https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=Z-qV9wVGb38
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Old 06-01-2017, 08:02 PM
 
Location: So Cal
40,220 posts, read 39,759,578 times
Reputation: 41679
Quote:
Originally Posted by BOS2IAD View Post
^^^^What a horrible thing to say to the waitress! Anyone who would treat a server like that --- especially one who gave good service---would no longer be a friend of mine!

When I was in college, I used to work part-time in the dorm cafeteria---I also used to eat there when I wasn't working. Diners were expected to return their trays to a conveyor belt. I was friends with someone who refused to return her tray, and called her out on it. Some of my other friends also did so. She felt that she didn't need to return her tray. I stopped eating meals with her after that.



Per the bolded, do you live in the US? If so, the standard tip is 20%. Recently, I read that in NYC it is now 25%.

Is 25% the new standard for tipping? Depends where you eat - TODAY.com

^^^^From the article:

Nowadays, 15 percent isnít an average tip Ė itís a way of registering displeasure with the service.
Bullcrap. I ain't paying 25 percent as a standard. Who dictates this stuff anyways.

15% is standard and I go up from there. If the service is great then 20 percent or more, but to just arbitrarily say we now have to pay an automatic 25 percent is garbage as far as I'm concerned. It's call a tip because it was designed as a small incentive to help ensure good service, if's it's mandatory, sorta defeats the idea behind it. Many places in the rest of the world they don't have tipping. Servers and staff are paid accordingly. I feel sorta resentful that I have to supplement the restaurant owner's payroll.

I have never not left a tip and I think what the OP's friend did was beyond tacky for sure. On the flip side, you don't like what you're making change your station in life via getting a better skillset that commands more money. I get a certain level of annoyance at all these people demanding a certain wage. Get a skillset that "demands" more pay.

Again, I tip, so I don't wanna get a bunch of crap about it through reps.
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Old 06-01-2017, 08:44 PM
 
Location: Silicon Valley
3,553 posts, read 1,599,002 times
Reputation: 6054
Quote:
Originally Posted by Sweet Like Sugar View Post
Servers shouldn't be asking for tips. Can't they get fired for that?
No, but in some restaurants if a chronic non-tipper is identified, and the host knows about it, the restaurants that reserve the right to refuse service can do exactly that. Trust me when servers appreciate front hosts that toss out people that don't get modern dining culture. (because guess who gets a share of the tips from the waitstaff?)

In higher end restaurants, it's not just that a normal tip is expected, but the IRS loves to do sting audits and determine what % of tip generally is in these places. They then use the average as to what an employee must report in tips, regardless of actual results. Imagine two people come in, have a $200 check in a place that assesses at 20%. The waiter MUST report to the government that they earned $40 of income. If the reality is $5, there's nothing they can do, except pay out more to the government than they actually got.

How many times do you think that occurs before I as a waiter start screwing with your food and giving you the worst service ever. A good boss will back up his/her crew on these items.
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Old 06-01-2017, 09:05 PM
 
Location: SW MO
23,605 posts, read 31,383,208 times
Reputation: 29064
Anyone who stiffs wait staff is worthless.
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