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Old 06-26-2017, 03:40 PM
 
Location: Paranoid State
13,047 posts, read 10,390,825 times
Reputation: 15672

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Men relate to each other quite differently. This clip is from Gran Torino.

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Old 06-26-2017, 07:39 PM
 
16,992 posts, read 20,622,433 times
Reputation: 33961
Quote:
Originally Posted by Destiny74 View Post
Had a friend who was alot larger than me and had much less income. I noticed she also had a lot of schadenfreude. We are no longer friends.
This happens, and when it does it's time to cut ties.

Quote:
Originally Posted by gouligann View Post
Jealousy will ruin a relationship!

I have an ex-friend who I've known since I was a teenager. (I'm now almost 60). He is/was a friend/acquaintance of my boyfriend's/husband's when I met him. He used to just tease both of us about normal things people would tease other people about.

As the years went on, he took the teasing to higher levels... downright rude and insulting. He threw money issues at us a LOT. I know he was sometimes trying to be funny, but his comments were hurtful but we just ignored them. UNTIL... he started on my grand-daughter's photo on facebook.

He totally IGNORED my grand-daughter's first photo I posted with my husband (her grand-father). He only made a snide remark about my husband looking old. Not ONE word of how cute our grand-daughter is. He also made a comment a few months later about the cute little pink headband my grand-daughter was wearing (said that it looked like a bride's garter belt). THAT WAS IT, I UNFRIENDED HIM AND I'M FINISHED WITH THE INSULTS. I have always, always made nice comments about his grown children and grandchildren.

After I took him off my facebook, he PM'd me and had the nerve to ask me why I unfriended him. Duh, before you go insulting me and my family, take a look at yourself!

I feel better not having to read or listen to him any more.
That speaks volumes, he is toxic.

And when people constantly insult you and than add on "only kidding", they're not kidding.
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Old 06-26-2017, 10:21 PM
 
Location: Garbage, NC
3,124 posts, read 2,037,400 times
Reputation: 8113
I have friends from all different walks of life.

I am a 29-year-old heterosexual married female who is doing well in my career and making pretty good money. My best friend on this planet is a 64-year-old homosexual single male who is really pretty poor and living off of Social Security. You wouldn't think that we have much in common at all, but we both love cooking, literature, music, travel...he has traveled all over the world and lived in the Czech Republic off and on for a decade, and he has the most fascinating stories. We cook together and turn the simplest ingredients into the most decadent meals and have so much fun while we're doing it. We share books and talk about them. He is the best.

I have other friends who are bigger than me, smaller than me and the same size. Some who are more educated or less educated. Some who make more money or less money or who don't work at all.
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Old 06-27-2017, 12:16 AM
 
Location: Eugene, Oregon
9,068 posts, read 2,964,358 times
Reputation: 13595
Quote:
Originally Posted by Ruth4Truth View Post
Actually, men are catty. They play one-upmanship games with each other. I haven't observed women doing that, at all.
I've never known any men who did that. Maybe the younger ones do. They're much less dignified and respectful than those from earlier times. But to answer the question of the original post, I've never met anyone who was at all like me. So for the limited socializing I do, I've had to associate with people with whom I had little in common, except for perhaps one area of interest. And there's always some lifelong friends, from a time of youth, when we did have much more in common. Even though we've all grown to be very different, we are still bound by those roots. The first one of that close peer-group passed-on recently and it's been a time of deep introspection for us. We've never gone through this before and I think we've all become much more aware of how important we all are to each other. I have realized how important I am to them and it is a responsibility that I must meet better than I have. When I wrote a response on his obituary guestbook today, these thoughts awakened in me.

Last edited by Steve McDonald; 06-27-2017 at 12:57 AM..
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Old 06-27-2017, 06:31 PM
 
2,502 posts, read 1,538,166 times
Reputation: 5349
Interesting thread. I'm surprised anyone out there can find "friends" who aren't jealous & competitive with them. I have noticed over the years that many people I come into contact with are always "sizing me up" and comparing themselves to me. They can all go screw themselves. This is why I keep so-called "friends" at a distance.
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Old 06-28-2017, 12:42 AM
 
172 posts, read 70,115 times
Reputation: 185
Quote:
Originally Posted by The Big Lebowski Dude View Post
Interesting thread. I'm surprised anyone out there can find "friends" who aren't jealous & competitive with them. I have noticed over the years that many people I come into contact with are always "sizing me up" and comparing themselves to me. They can all go screw themselves. This is why I keep so-called "friends" at a distance.
Sizing me up. That's the eight phrase.
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Old 06-28-2017, 04:51 AM
 
172 posts, read 70,115 times
Reputation: 185
Quote:
Originally Posted by Jenkay View Post
Maybe she senses that you think she's somehow not in your "league". You imply that attractiveness to men is the most important factor in a woman's self-esteem (if that's true for you and your friends, then I'm sorry for you). I suspect she can tell that you feel sorry for her because you think you're more attractive, and is lashing out accordingly.
It's not the most important. It's also about intelligence, which she also has a lot of trouble with in our past group of friends but moreso, when a person is constantly showing how insecure they are, I cannot help but feel sorry for them.
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Old 06-29-2017, 12:03 PM
 
491 posts, read 333,772 times
Reputation: 566
Your standing or level or wtv matters to snooty and judgemental people. I'd guess the higher up on the income level you've managed to achieve, or if you just have like some kinda high status, the more likely you'll end up caring about that level stuff. I could be wrong there though? Me? I wouldn't give a toss if the person graduated high school. Wtv.
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Old 07-02-2017, 05:33 PM
 
Location: Scottsdale, AZ
52 posts, read 31,047 times
Reputation: 107
My wife and I have had on and off difficulty making friends with other Intellectual types! If you figure it out let us know!
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Old 07-05-2017, 12:29 PM
 
Location: Minneapolis, MN
430 posts, read 181,116 times
Reputation: 644
I think it's good to have friends from all walks of life. From personal experience, I feel people learn how to accept differences easier and faster, without making a big deal about someone who's religiously different. Like I went to four high schools and the first three were amazing. Incredibly big and diverse, so I made friends with tons of different people from different backgrounds easily. I loved the experience, love meeting new people, enjoy making friends with a variety of backgrounds, and felt it was amazing. The last high school, which was extremely homogeneous (with me being a huge outcast due to race alone and it was very racist), taught me it's WAY better to grow up in a diverse city rather than one where damn near everyone is the exact same. In my 2.5yrs of living in that city and going to school there, I've experienced more racism, homophobia, transphobia, hatred based on my lack of hunting (I don't even like guns tbh) and political preferences directed at me than I had my entire 20yrs of life. 2.5yrs of living in ONE city and I've experienced more ignorance fueled hatred directed at people than I had my entire life.

Due to that, I continue to get to know and be friendly with almost everyone. I don't discriminate. I don't like guns or hunting and I have gun loving hunters as friends, just don't invite me. I'm bisexual and I have straight friends, just don't assume I like you like that we're only friends for a reason. I'm black and I have friends from all races, just don't be racist towards others and we're coolio. I'm not religious and I have religious friends, just don't ask me to go to church or convert. I seriously don't care who you are, just don't be a dickwaffle and we're chill. I hang out with almost everyone at my job. I talk with older men and women about civil rights and I'm 20. I talk to my vegan friend about how he cooks and what he eats, I eat meat. I talk with my Muslim friend about his religion, I'm not religious. I talk to everyone about everything and I enjoy the experiences. As another neat result, all my friends usually come to me for non-biased advice.

I only don't get along with one group and that's macho men. The "alpha male" (which I hate that term) types. The types that talk about sex, drinking, and sports ALL THE TIME. In my opinion (in my opinion) it's annoying, it reeks of insecurity, and I don't like the general disrespectful tone towards women, fetishizing of lesbian, or the BS towards GBT men, so I avoid them. I don't vibe with them, they don't vibe we me, we avoid each other and the set-up works fabulously.
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