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If my dad calls and I don't answer (or get back to him right away), he will call again an hour or so later, and then again, and then wonder why I didn't answer earlier.
Is this normal? He's not elderly and I'm not a kid. We're talking upper 50s and upper 30s here.
From my perspective, it's almost like he's still keeping tabs on me even though I moved away years ago.
Do you make yourself available to your parents on demand? BTW I'm not looking for a guilt trip (i.e. you're lucky your parent calls) but just wondering if this is normal or maybe I'm the unreasonable one.
I think it's unusual for a dad. Well, OK; the repeat calling is unusual for anyone.
There's a tendency for dads to let the moms maintain contact with the kids, though there may be plenty of exceptions. Did you have a close bond with your dad when you were growing up? It's odd that he calls every hour, after leaving a message. Have you ever mentioned to him casually, "Hey, dad, all you need to do is leave a message, and then I'll get back to you when I'm home, or when I have time. I check my messages daily"?
Or, you could say, when you call him back, "I got your several messages. Is something wrong? So many calls! Is there an emergency?" And see what he says.
If my dad calls and I don't answer (or get back to him right away), he will call again an hour or so later, and then again, and then wonder why I didn't answer earlier.
Is this normal? He's not elderly and I'm not a kid. We're talking upper 50s and upper 30s here.
From my perspective, it's almost like he's still keeping tabs on me even though I moved away years ago.
Do you make yourself available to your parents on demand? BTW I'm not looking for a guilt trip (i.e. you're lucky your parent calls) but just wondering if this is normal or maybe I'm the unreasonable one.
No it's not normal
If he asks why you didn't answer earlier, just say "Why do you ask?" then remind him to relax a little
If he asks why you didn't answer earlier, just say "Why do you ask?" then remind him to relax a little
Keep doing it, he'll get the message
Ok thanks for the tip. It's almost like he's looking for an explanation and then I find myself explaining why I didn't answer which I shouldn't be doing.
He doesn't leave a message? Then how do you know it's him? What does he do, let it ring, then hang up? Are we talking about a home land line?
Caller ID
And yes a home landline.
I recently got my own cell phone (I had one before but it was issued by my employer so could only use it for limited personal use) so now I think he's likely expecting me to be more available assuming I will carry it wherever I go.
For example, he called my home line and I wasn't home. He then called my home line and cell line (which I didn't have with me at the time) an hour or so later. Then he called my home line again a couple hours after that and I was home and available so I answered.
I need to remember that "Why do you ask?" line, for when people say something rude or condescending or whatever. "Why do you say that?" And see what they say. Some people play weird little passive-aggressive games, or whatever, and don't expect someone to shine a light on it, and make them justify or explain it. It's a useful phrase.
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