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Old 08-13-2017, 05:54 PM
305 posts, read 207,073 times
Reputation: 341


I've never in my 20 years in the corporate world have gone to my boss in regards to a coworker but this time I felt this person was affecting my job. Very dismissive and unresponsive. Taking credit for work I was asked to do when I offered to help her she would barely acknowledge me. She is completely helpful to others in the dept but is rude to me. Can't even give me eye contact. This seem to happen right after she over heard a friendly conversation where I defended Trump about something (and I don't need a lecture about not talking about politics at work, I know that). She overheard and went off on Trump, loudly swearing in the office about what a f'n baby and moron his is. You just don't say things like that in and office environment about the president or anyone....after that that she has been EXTRA nice to the women who I was having a friendly disagreement with and dismissive with me. I'm pretty sure this is the root of the issue (I didn't tell my boss that though). I just said I was concerned and brought up the issues I was having. She then went and talk to my coworker and told her what I said....shouldn't she have kept it anonymous? Well anyway, my coworker denied it and my boss came back to me and said my coworker was "shocked" and that this person didn't do anything wrong and there isn't anything else she can do and that is just how she is, and "it wasn't like she told you to shut up or anything". I felt like a fool for saying anything. Now this coworker won't speak to me at all and probably thinks I'm racist or something. My boss said we can all sit down and talk but it would just be them making me feel more like a fool so I chose not to. I saw some of her public FB posts and all were in regards to racists and people who voted for Trump are racists and people who don't support Obama are racists (she has Obama pics at her desk). She is black but I didn't even think about her race....just that she was treating me (and others in the past who have complained) in an unprofessional matter. A friend of mine brought to my attention that because she is black is the reason she can get away with what she does and they will never take anyone else's side but hers because they don't want to appear racist. Really? Is this what it has come to? She has also been here 30 years and can do whatever she wants. She gets her work done and always has to act as if she knows everything....but is on personal calls for hours a day as she does her work. Calls in every few weeks or leaves early. Always has an issue also with her, her kids, her house....and has to leave....and then everyone always asking how she is....And the funny thing is, my boss couldn't stand her (and my coworker didn't like her either) until she became our boss. Now they act as if they are best friends. It's been 3 month now and my coworker and I haven't said one word to each other. But she is extra nice to everyone else.
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Old 08-13-2017, 06:07 PM
1,441 posts, read 1,122,579 times
Reputation: 4859
I hope you learned your lesson about what not to talk about at work. It sounds like you have 2 choices live with it or find another job.
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Old 08-13-2017, 06:07 PM
Location: NC
2,152 posts, read 1,170,971 times
Reputation: 5275
This seems like deja vu. Haven't you posted this before?
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Old 08-13-2017, 06:12 PM
1,063 posts, read 491,417 times
Reputation: 4056
Wow, that is tough.

Choices -

1) Just keep doing what you're doing and let it go. Always act professional and keep a pleasant expression pasted on your face. Eventually it will fade.

2) Have a quiet conversation with each of them, separately and just say the truth, that you feel badly about what you think may be the source of discomfort. Apologize, even if you don't think you did anything wrong, maybe just for "talking politics" at work. Say something to effect of you just want to get atmosphere back to normal. Plan carefully what you want to say and stick with it, don't get sidetracked. Don't judge, stick to how you feel and goal of clearing the air.

3) Ask boss to help by holding the meeting originally suggested and do same as #2 in the meeting.

Good luck.
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Old 08-13-2017, 07:27 PM
Location: Gettysburg, PA
1,618 posts, read 1,621,952 times
Reputation: 3004
I know you said to not lecture you about not talking politics at work, but you got what you asked for when you spoke up about it. Some people are crazy about politics and this person fits the bill. Any more political discussions come up at work, plead the 5th. I wouldn't talk to anyone involved in the situation about it. Your manager did not do her job. She should have confronted the person and not have mentioned any names (she probably shouldn't be in her position if she can't handle what you brought to her in a more effective manner, or at least not have made the situation worse as she did).

Anyway, your co-worker sounds like a drama queen. People like that overhear everything. Just don't socialize at work anymore. Do your job. End of story. You have no other options really than to that or look for another job because really, I'm quite sure trying to talk it out with unreasonable people like how she seems to be is not going to produce any results (the only other thing I can possibly think of is to go over your manager to her manager. Explain what happened, how the situation was not handled properly. Then go from there).
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Old 08-13-2017, 07:31 PM
5,429 posts, read 3,455,723 times
Reputation: 13714
Sometimes the person who is being cast in the wrong in a work situation actually has made the most accurate or most genuine assessment.
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Old 08-13-2017, 09:01 PM
Location: Middle of the ocean
31,701 posts, read 20,001,474 times
Reputation: 45760
You do have a lot of posts about your job. Perhaps it would be better if you found some place more suitable?
My posts as a Mod will always be in red.
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Moderator: Relationships Forum / Hawaii Forum / Dogs
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Old 08-13-2017, 09:09 PM
Location: Illinois
4,754 posts, read 4,330,050 times
Reputation: 12914
So...you said something about Trump at work, and then she said something about Trump at work. You both expressed your opinions.

You should both be adult enough to move on, but the fact that at the end of your post you bring up her race, her pictures of Obama, her being on the phone "for hours" (really, hours?) at a time, show me that you're trying to make the issue personal and make her look bad.

Also this: "She is black but I didn't even think about her race...." tells me you're either living under a rock or are just ignorant of the current state of affairs in America.
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Old 08-13-2017, 09:25 PM
Location: Dallas TX
15,030 posts, read 21,758,845 times
Reputation: 22240
Originally Posted by goldenlove View Post
This seems like deja vu. Haven't you posted this before?
I think so...
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Old 08-13-2017, 09:31 PM
2,502 posts, read 1,548,127 times
Reputation: 5349
To the OP: You should NEVER have discussed politics at work.

At my job, anyone expressing their opinions on politics or religion gets in serious trouble. At the least, they'll get written up.
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