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I grow tired of being hurt by friends and it seems that in every friendship, someone will do you wrong or not appreciate you. Then when this happens too much and you have to make new friends, it gets to be frustrating to find friends who will treat you nice...maybe I just have bad luck, but most people just seem mean to me even though I treat them with total respect. Also, I have a hard time finding romantic relationships even though people consider me attractive. I have a hard time finding someone that likes me the way I like them and will be nice to me. LOL I expect people to be too nice, I think. Right now, I have friends but none of them that I am super close to, so I am just wondering if any of you are in a situation where you have no close friends and no romantic relationship and how to get through the loneliness.
I'm married and have no close friends. Then again, I'm also an introvert who happens to be comfortable in my own head. There are times it would be great to have a very close circle of friends like I used to have back in my early 20's. A group of guys I can call up and say, "Hey....let's go grab a beer" Or coffee. But then life seems to get in the way of being able to develop those friendships.
Yep. I'm in my single season and embracing it. Therefore, I don't feel lonely because this is my choice for now. Not dating because I'm just not interested. As for friends, I have a few acquaintances but no one I'm really close to.
That said, when I'm ready for a change, I will go for it. For now, this works for me and I am totally content.
However, I often wonder if something is wrong with me because I am so content with this.
But, perhaps it comes down to just being comfortable in your own skin, whether you're a couple, solo, & with or without friends.
I grow tired of being hurt by friends and it seems that in every friendship, someone will do you wrong or not appreciate you. Then when this happens too much and you have to make new friends, it gets to be frustrating to find friends who will treat you nice...maybe I just have bad luck, but most people just seem mean to me even though I treat them with total respect. Also, I have a hard time finding romantic relationships even though people consider me attractive. I have a hard time finding someone that likes me the way I like them and will be nice to me. LOL I expect people to be too nice, I think. Right now, I have friends but none of them that I am super close to, so I am just wondering if any of you are in a situation where you have no close friends and no romantic relationship and how to get through the loneliness.
My friends do not hurt me. Can only recall once or twice in my entire life when a "friend" hurt me and it was a misunderstanding, not something deliberate. These are friends, not just people I happen to know. There's a huge difference.
I haven't been in a romantic relationship for a long time but people's need for that varies a lot. Sometimes I feel lonely, but most of the time I don't. IMHO attractiveness has very little to do with a deep romantic relationship. Attractiveness may be the window dressing, but there has to be more underneath to make it last. Also, some relationships shift from friend to romantic and they can also shift back again. That has happened to me. If the people really care about each other it doesn't matter....they value each other no matter what.
Decastro, I could have written your post.
I keep my friend circle very tiny. These are people I've know for years, in other parts of the country. We talk a few times a year, but they are deep genuine conversations.
The past few years I've had bad luck making friends. I attract the needy type for some reason. So I've gotten to the point where I've shut down because I don't trust anyone.
Relationships? Meh. I tried online dating but I can't get past the weirdos. One guy contacted me, and he had pics of a sex dungeon in his profile. Mmmkay...
I find that I've accepted things as they are and I'm happy. I'm engaged in more activities and I'm enjoying myself. The loneliness doesn't bother me; I don't feel lonely. I find I meet people in one-off situations, meaning they're brief encounters where no one leaves with the others number or anything like that. I go and get drinks after work and have met people at the bar. On vacation I meet people. People walking down the street and asking for directions, we'll engage in conversations. I just met this lady yesterday in the grocery and we swapped recipes. I find I enjoy these one-offs because I meet different people, and it seems like I learn something new.
I say all this to say try going out without the intention of meeting people. Just go out, be yourself and have fun. You'll probably be more relaxed and people may be drawn to you. You never know who you may meet. And be grateful for your one-offs because they're probably preparing you for those relationships you want.
Not all friendships late forever, of course. However, I hate to say this, but if this keeps happening to you, maybe you're doing something wrong. Maybe you're either choosing the wrong people, or acting in ways that have them reacting in ways you don't expect. My question would be: Do you discuss this with them?
Not all friendships late forever, of course. However, I hate to say this, but if this keeps happening to you, maybe you're doing something wrong. Maybe you're either choosing the wrong people, or acting in ways that have them reacting in ways you don't expect. My question would be: Do you discuss this with them?
Yeah I discuss these things with them when it comes up. I have one friend now that justifies himself as being an ******* and that he can't help being that way. He constantly says sarcastic remarks and whenever I have tried to end the friendship in the past, he would try to guilt me. I need to end it permanently this time but I know when I tell him it is over, he will call names and try to pick a fight so I have avoided ending it.
As much as I admire some marriages...Particularly the faithfull and independent ones...
I personally cannot be (half) in a relationship. Or be subjected to interrogations and assumptions...
I am fiercely loyal to my mate and equally independent...So having a mate who can tolerate that and be OK with it has not been well received. So singlehood is by far easier to sustain. Friends and acquaintances are valued..Be they male or female.. I find it complimentary to be a friend indeed
I grow tired of being hurt by friends and it seems that in every friendship, someone will do you wrong or not appreciate you. Then when this happens too much and you have to make new friends, it gets to be frustrating to find friends who will treat you nice...maybe I just have bad luck, but most people just seem mean to me even though I treat them with total respect. Also, I have a hard time finding romantic relationships even though people consider me attractive. I have a hard time finding someone that likes me the way I like them and will be nice to me. LOL I expect people to be too nice, I think. Right now, I have friends but none of them that I am super close to, so I am just wondering if any of you are in a situation where you have no close friends and no romantic relationship and how to get through the loneliness.
I don't care about being single but it is ridiculous how hard it is to make friends these days.
Yes. I had one stressful friendship I was glad that ended this year - gave me unnecessary stress and anxiety. I don't have many friends and I'm fine with it. Don't need validation and I like the company of my family and myself anyways. Too much flakiness from friends I had made me think I deserve better.
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