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You need to sit them down and tell them there will be an end to this. Set a date. Make a contract and have them sign it. By such and such a date, either he (the bf) or you will be gone.
You need to sit them down and tell them there will be an end to this. Set a date. Make a contract and have them sign it. By such and such a date, either he (the bf) or you will be gone.
It seems to me that, by letting his other place go, he's getting ready to start paying rent at the OP's place. He's in the process of becoming an official renter, I suspect. So an ultimatum wouldn't work. Assuming he does start paying his share of expenses, a different sort of ultimatum might offer a shred of hope for working, though I wouldn't hold my breath; a contract specifiying leaving a clean kitchen after use, and other basic courtesies normally involved in sharing a home together, "or else" they'll lose the OP's portion of the rent.
IDK if it's possible to teach an old dog new tricks, though. Even with money as an incentive. In fact, the old dog might just resent the attempt to "control" him, and might get an attitude toward the OP.
The next time they're hogging the living room. Grab the remote, plop down on the couch right in between them. Put your feet up on the coffee table and ask them what they're making you for dinner.
Once I lived with a roommate girl, and one night I woke up because the police raided the house for her drugs.
Since then, I did anything I could to live in my own studio. And yes, it cost more. So I ate less. Good for the diet.
I wish you the very best, you really care about others and yourself. Hope there's a way to make it work.
Quote:
Originally Posted by M3Guy
So I'm living with a female roommate and we get along great.
-my car is always getting blocked in the driveway by her bf. Her and I had an agreement that I get the driveway, and she gets the master bedroom with bathroom.
- I NEVER get to watch TV anymore. They are always hogging the couch and TV.
-besides my room, I have no use of the common areas anymore.
-utilities are higher. Because one or the other is always home.
I'm paying half of the rent and utilities. She's paying the other half(I'm assuming) since he doesn't have a job. How is this fair to me when I'm reduced down to just my room?
When they are out at bars, they bring their drunk asses home along with their drunk ass friends. They are all loud, drunk and obnoxious and I can't get sleep.
Is that what being a couple is all about? I don't see love and passion in their relationship. Just best friends that screw. 😂😂
So I have a good job where I live. I'm not wanting to buy property just yet since I don't plan on living in my state long term(2 more years max). I'm living with a female roommate and we get along great. We've been living together for 2.5 years. About a year ago, she starts dating this guy(he's cool). He recently lost his job and has been unemployed for 3-4 months. Now he's living with us! Since he doesn't have a job, he's not paying a share of rent or utilities. Everything was awesome when it was just me and her living there since I'm not a huge fan of living with several people. I spoke to my roommate about this and she understands my frustration. On top of that, I have to deal with the:
- always one or the other is home, if not both. I get no privacy anymore.
-my car is always getting blocked in the driveway by her bf. Her and I had an agreement that I get the driveway, and she gets the master bedroom with bathroom. Now he's in the picture and doesn't understand this arrangement.
- I NEVER get to watch TV anymore. They are always hogging the couch and TV. They watch anime and play videogames(these people are in their mid to late 30's btw).
-The kitchen is always a mess. Always dirty dishes.
-when I come home from work, I get the pleasure of seeing him running the air conditioner and watching TV(with no job).
-besides my room, I have no use of the common areas anymore. Their crap is everywhere.
-utilities are higher. Because one or the other is always home. The house is never empty.
-we aren't splitting rent in 1/3. I'm paying half of the rent and utilities. She's paying the other half(I'm assuming) since he doesn't have a job. How is this fair to me when I'm reduced down to just my room?
-the bring the party home. When they are out at bars, they bring their drunk asses home along with their drunk ass friends. They are all loud, drunk and obnoxious and I can't get sleep(again, they are in their mid and late 30's).
The living situation has changed alot. When it was just me and my roommate, it was awesome. Not anymore. And I noticed how lazy she has become since hes been living there. Besides from complaining about her job, all they do is eat, play videogames or watch Japanese cartoons. When they are not out getting wasted somewhere.
I know, I'm working on getting my own place. I'm just venting.
From the outside looking in, is that what being a couple is all about? Becoming lazy slobs who just do stupid things together? I don't see love and passion in their relationship. Just best friends that screw. Good thing I'm not in a relationship anymore ����
If I wasn't on the lease, I would be gone yesterday. If I was on the lease I'd suck it up until the lease expired, after giving prior legally required notice to all concerned I would not renew the lease, and move that day.
Last edited by texan2yankee; 09-01-2017 at 07:38 PM..
Not being a pushover. I've stated the way I feel already. I don't care that he's living there. What I care about is him getting whatever job he can a paying his portion of bills. Maybe I should come down harder on my roommate to push him more. It's not my place to relate that message to him. I'm not his girlfriend, nor did I invite him to live with us.
Why did you agree to let him move in without paying rent or utilities?
You don't care that he's living there. You just want him to get a job and pay his portion of the rent/utilities correct?
So tell the woman either he gets a job or he needs to go.
You let your roomate step all over you. Did you not have ground rules when you moved in together? Did you not realize something like this will happen?
Since it is you and your room mates apartment, tell her he gots to go now. No more staying over. If he is jobless or not, is irrelevant, 3 is a crowd.
You should demand his share of the cost, he has drink money, he has bills money. Give only 1/3 until he is out, and out now. Call the cops if you have to, f it.
It seems to me that, by letting his other place go, he's getting ready to start paying rent at the OP's place. He's in the process of becoming an official renter, I suspect. So an ultimatum wouldn't work. Assuming he does start paying his share of expenses, a different sort of ultimatum might offer a shred of hope for working, though I wouldn't hold my breath; a contract specifiying leaving a clean kitchen after use, and other basic courtesies normally involved in sharing a home together, "or else" they'll lose the OP's portion of the rent.
IDK if it's possible to teach an old dog new tricks, though. Even with money as an incentive. In fact, the old dog might just resent the attempt to "control" him, and might get an attitude toward the OP.
I don't think so on the BF paying rent. He isn't(and she isn't) cleaning up after themselves, BF blocks the driveway blocking the OP in, they have taken over the common areas......he isn't going to start paying rent.
Quote:
Originally Posted by MissTerri
The next time they're hogging the living room. Grab the remote, plop down on the couch right in between them. Put your feet up on the coffee table and ask them what they're making you for dinner.
I suggested the same thing a few pages back. These two know they have a pasty living with them, OP doesn't want to hear that(many people especially those who are in their 20s) take any truth with offense, too bad, it's the truth.
One more time, people can only take advantage of you if you allow them.
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