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Old 12-26-2017, 07:02 AM
 
14,375 posts, read 18,374,578 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Lbjen View Post
Well when my kids leave valuables lying around, we remove them. It’s only for safekeeping, and they get them back if/when they ask. We do it to make them more responsible for their things. We’ve never actually kept anything of theirs. I think you’re reading too much into it.
Except the OP has never been told this is the case and does not appear to have gotten any of their money back.
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Old 12-26-2017, 07:49 AM
 
16 posts, read 22,175 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Spuggy View Post
This is what I'm wondering. It's not like the mother hid the money under the mattress, she had it in a place she was clearly not hiding when she said the envelopes were in the drawer when op asked about it. The presumption and lack of good will towards someone opens the door for constant suspicion and looking for validation. Not sure why the op hasn't discussed this with the family or given the concern keeps leaving money lying around.
Money was in my room tho.
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Old 12-26-2017, 07:57 AM
 
16,421 posts, read 12,510,794 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by howshouldifeel9813 View Post
yes all the time. Drive mom around everywhere, fill water, wash dishes, take out garbage, I am pretty independent and responsible with my money. Just sucks like I can't even feel safe in my own home lol. I don't want to bring it up because my mom would just be like oh well i cook for you, how about I charge you rent etc.. I am thinking about just giving the money to my dad cause I don't want it anymore and I know my dad is a good guy even though he can be an ass.
I would flat out ask her why she took your money. Yes, she cooks for you and doesn't charge rent, but that's not the way to go about recouping. If she wanted you to pay your share, she needs to come to an agreement with you about how much you will pay her for rent and food ... not just take money off of your desk. That's stealing. And unless you call her on it, it's not going to stop. You're condoning her behavior by not saying anything.
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Old 12-26-2017, 08:45 AM
 
6,300 posts, read 4,197,862 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by howshouldifeel9813 View Post
Money was in my room tho.
Then you need to ask her if she took the money and put it in the drawer? if she says no then ask your father. Bottom line though is that you may need to start putting your money in a safe place, save up and move out.
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Old 12-26-2017, 09:03 AM
 
Location: 89052 & 75206
8,151 posts, read 8,350,911 times
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“Hey, Mom, why was my money in your room?” “Hummm......OK, now I know to keep it in a secure place”



Stop with the LOL all the time. Its not funny and minimizes you as an adult person with capable thoughts.
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Old 12-26-2017, 09:27 AM
 
Location: Saint John, IN
11,582 posts, read 6,736,853 times
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How old are you? You obviously live at home so do you pay any bills to live there, anything towards utilities, food or rent? Have you asked them why they are taking your money? Have your parents asked you to help with the bills?


I have also heard of some parents taking half of what every money their child makes while living at home and they put it in a saving account for them to help them save for college or to move out.


Regardless, you need to ask THEM why the are doing this? Could be a legit answer looming!
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Old 12-26-2017, 09:35 AM
 
Location: State of Transition
102,210 posts, read 107,904,670 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Lbjen View Post
Well when my kids leave valuables lying around, we remove them. It’s only for safekeeping, and they get them back if/when they ask. We do it to make them more responsible for their things. We’ve never actually kept anything of theirs. I think you’re reading too much into it.
If there's no one else coming into the house besides the parents, why would anything need to be hidden away "for safekeeping"? Presumably, valuables are safe around family members. Is it a mistake to trust one's parents/family? Are you saying they're not worthy of trust, as a general rule? Leaving an envelope of money in one's room at home isn't evidence of carelessness. It's evidence of complete trust and a sense of security in the family home. That has now been shattered.
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Old 12-26-2017, 09:38 AM
 
Location: State of Transition
102,210 posts, read 107,904,670 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Spuggy View Post
This is what I'm wondering. It's not like the mother hid the money under the mattress, she had it in a place she was clearly not hiding when she said the envelopes were in the drawer when op asked about it. The presumption and lack of good will towards someone opens the door for constant suspicion and looking for validation. Not sure why the op hasn't discussed this with the family or given the concern keeps leaving money lying around.
This is the bizarre thing about it, though; she didn't say, "I put your envelope in my envelope drawer". She said that if he needed an envelope, he could get it from her drawer, and it's ok to take one, because they only cost a few cents. That's an extremely strange thing to say, knowing that he was looking for his money. It's as if she was pretending to not know there was a $100 bill in it.

And why would she have gone into his room for the couple of hours he was out of the house, anyway? Does she routinely inspect his room, every time he goes out? If so, why? That, too, is unusual behavior. Presumably, she had no reason to go into his room while he stepped out for a bit, unless she was looking for money. And if she was, how far would she have gone to find it? Would she have opened all his drawers, if she didn't find anything lying around, readily evident?

For that matter, if she'd wanted to "put it away for safekeeping", she could have put it in one of HIS drawers, not her own. That would have been most people's reaction.

Last edited by Ruth4Truth; 12-26-2017 at 09:46 AM..
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Old 12-26-2017, 09:53 AM
 
Location: Wonderland
67,650 posts, read 60,925,505 times
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Oh good grief, OP - don't leave your money laying around. Put it in a wallet. Put it in the bank. Put it in a safe. Put it under a drawer liner in a small drawer somewhere. In other words, keep up with your own cash.

And if you think your mom - or anyone else - is taking your money, ASK THEM if that's what they're doing. All this casually leaving money laying around or whatever, and then speculating on the motives of others, is just that - speculation. Just ask. Then behave responsibly with your money.
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Old 12-26-2017, 10:23 AM
 
6,300 posts, read 4,197,862 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Ruth4Truth View Post
This is the bizarre thing about it, though; she didn't say, "I put your envelope in my envelope drawer". She said that if he needed an envelope, he could get it from her drawer, and it's ok to take one, because they only cost a few cents. That's an extremely strange thing to say, knowing that he was looking for his money. It's as if she was pretending to not know there was a $100 bill in it.

And why would she have gone into his room for the couple of hours he was out of the house, anyway? Does she routinely inspect his room, every time he goes out? If so, why? That, too, is unusual behavior. Presumably, she had no reason to go into his room while he stepped out for a bit, unless she was looking for money. And if she was, how far would she have gone to find it? Would she have opened all his drawers, if she didn't find anything lying around, readily evident?

For that matter, if she'd wanted to "put it away for safekeeping", she could have put it in one of HIS drawers, not her own. That would have been most people's reaction.

Then my view is the same, if the OP suspects someone in the house is taking money then they need to put it in a SAFE place and save up and MOVE the heck out. I echo Kathryn's statement;"And if you think your mom - or anyone else - is taking your money, ASK THEM if that's what they're doing. All this casually leaving money laying around or whatever, and then speculating on the motives of others, is just that - speculation. Just ask. Then behave responsibly with your money."
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