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They want to give him until the end of next week to leave. They don't want to police at their house because they don't want to give the neighbors something to gossip about.
This right here tells me that the whole family dynamic is dysfunctional. Who worries about the frikken neighbors and what they think when a violent person is running amok in the house?
I don't say that to put your family down, but just to let you know that nothing you described, including the above, points to a semi-normal or healthy family system.
Yes, your best bet is to distance yourself from your brother and his girlfriend, but also, as you proceed, understand that you may have some things to learn about how emotionally healthy people interact with one another, and seek it for yourself. Removing yourself from a toxic relationship is step one. Good luck to you and your child.
This right here tells me that the whole family dynamic is dysfunctional. Who worries about the frikken neighbors and what they think when a violent person is running amok in the house?
I don't say that to put your family down, but just to let you know that nothing you described, including the above, points to a semi-normal or healthy family system.
Yes, your best bet is to distance yourself from your brother and his girlfriend, but also, as you proceed, understand that you may have some things to learn about how emotionally healthy people interact with one another, and seek it for yourself. Removing yourself from a toxic relationship is step one. Good luck to you and your child.
Thank you. My family has always been dysfunctional. When I had my own place, they were always calling asking for money. It hurts that I was there for them when they needed my help financially and now they won't kick my toxic brother to the curb immediately. I almost have enough money to get my own place again, so this nightmare will be over soon.
My brother attacked me a few days ago during an argument. Long story short, I fell on hard times. I had a high risk pregnancy and a special needs child. I had to quit my job. I lost my apartment and went through most of my savings. I was friends with him and his girlfriend. They let me stay with them for 11 weeks. I paid one third of the household expenses while I lived there. My child did not live with me while I stayed with them. My brother is is 30 years old, and he has never had a job. His girlfriend expected me to pay half the bills, and she said my brother doesn't have to work or pay any bills. I got tired of them taking advantage of me, and I moved out. I moved in with my parents with my child and I pay them rent. I almost have enough money to get back on my feet again. My brothers girlfriend lost her place because she couldn't afford to pay the bills after I moved out. My brother is staying with me and my parents, and he has a time limit to move out. He has been snapping at me. Throwing it in my face that he was nice enough to let me stay with his girlfriend. I let him know that I paid bills while I stayed with him and he paid nothing. He attacked me, and his girlfriend wants to fight me. I really want both of them out of my life. They are toxic. He is being nice again. I'm just ready to get my place again and never speak to him. My parents are kicking him out in two weeks.
Sound like there's a lot of immaturity and drama. I'd avoid him and work on getting my own place ASAP.
You have a special needs child in the home and are still (I presume) pregnant? If the police are called, social services will be next at your door. Listen, your parents are never going to make your brother grow up and start taking responsibility for himself, you’re wasting your time even trying. Walk away, and do better for yourself and for your children.
You have a special needs child in the home and are still (I presume) pregnant? If the police are called, social services will be next at your door. Listen, your parents are never going to make your brother grow up and start taking responsibility for himself, you’re wasting your time even trying. Walk away, and do better for yourself and for your children.
She didn't say she is pregnant NOW. She said she lost her job because of a high-risk pregnancy and then dealing with a special-needs child.
You have had quite a struggle, your child will need your attention...the last thing you need is a relationship with any person who would attack you. The fact that you share some DNA and family background does not give that person a pass.
They want to give him until the end of next week to leave. They don't want to police at their house because they don't want to give the neighbors something to gossip about.
You didn't answer the question.
What's the back up plan when he doesn't leave?
I have a feeling next week will turn into next month, next month will turn into after the 4th of July and on and on.
If what you say is true he isn't going to leave without the police getting involved.
Look at this way, neighbors gossiping about your brother going out of the house with the cops for trespassing or going out of the house due to assaulting family members or worse.
Quote:
Originally Posted by runswithscissors
That's not what was said, though.
I said: Aside from all the craziness and Jerry Springer antics ....
I was focused on ONE point she made - that they "took advantage" of her by letting her live with them.
The OTHER member who mentioned Jerry Springer issues said FOCUS ON THE SERIOUS STUFF and itemized it. AND said:
Neither of us lumped all the OP's junk into the Springer category.
But of course it IS totally Springeresque.
Nobody acts like this if they didn't have a lifetime of it.
I don't think you're getting it, forget Jerry Springer.
I am talking about the OP and her parents ending up on the local news as victims of violent crimes.
Someone who has nothing to lose and nowhere to go and has already gotten physical with her, well it could end up very tragically.
1) If your brother physically attacked you, then he's got major problems. Insulate yourself from him. Walk away. Stay away until he sorts himself out.
2) At the same time, figure out what you did to contribute to this. Chances are, there is something you're omitting from this post. Most posts like this are written to depict the OP in the nicest possible light.
3) Truthfully, if this account is accurate, your whole family is a mess. You need to step back fro the entirety of your situation and get your life in gear. Figure out what you're doing that's self-destructive and cut it out.
I second MVD's excellent post!
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