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How does one get rid of toxic people in their life? Moved to a retirement spot and met a person that is absolutely overwhelming me. I can do nothing right and by the end of our conversation or visit, I feel suicidal (almost). Is critical of every inch of our lives and our business. Well, at best I feel like gum on the bottom the shoe.
Not sure how you mean get rid of them. Are you living with them now? If not.. all you have to do is walk away from them and do not talk to them. If you do live with them.. my suggestion is to talk to them and tell them how you are feeling about them. Maybe that will help change things. Your information is very vague so very hard to really respond to.
I take it you just met this person?
If that is the case, don't go around this person. If you have to be around them or happen to run into them, be polite and say you need to run some errands or if you have a cell phone, pretend it's ringing or vibrating and answer it in front of this person. There are so many different ways to avoid these kinds of people and most are not very nice and may seem rude, but you gotta do what's best for you. It's better for you to be a little rude than to have this vampire suck the life out of you.
I was once told by my DW that you should kill them with kindness . 1) Always be cheerful to them and around them, 2) show some concern for their well-being, but not to much, 3) if they start to put you down, then just politely excuse your self. And the third step should be used everytime they attempt to be contemptible toward you, this is just showing them that your not going to invite poison into your life.
Please, nothing against others that have posted on this thread, but people that need to be on a cell phone whether for pretend or not, are just plain rude no matter how you look at it. And obviously this other person that they are referring to thrives on being rude. So why step into their world, when you could invite them into your better world? "Kill Them With Kindness"
Avoid and ignore the person as much as possible, there is no way you can cure that type person. they'll suck the life out of you.
Go the other direction, do all you can to avoid him/her. Seriously there's no other way, you can try talking till you're blue in the face. The unhappiness is within them, not you. But they'll drag you down every given chance. It has nothing to do with age, they're in all walks of life too.
You must disassociate yourself from this person. People like that rarely take a hint so you just have to be up front with them. Be tactful about it, but let them know that your lives are taking two different directions and you have to follow your own path. Be nice, be friendly, but don't waste any more time with them.
Thank you all so much for the suggestions. I am trying a few now and hope that time will just take care of it. Sorry to be so vague. I shall become busy, busy, busier.
Thank you all so much for the suggestions. I am trying a few now and hope that time will just take care of it. Sorry to be so vague. I shall become busy, busy, busier.
Good Luck MotleyCrew, and have a blessed Easter Day .
At one point, someone I had been friends with since freshman year of high school, had a very wild period. I had my wild periods too...but then had a child, had a fiance, bought a house and started calming down. She still was going through them and at times it involved my family (late phone calls, coming over to crash in the middle of the night...). So what I did was write a long letter to end the friendship, explaining why, and that if things got straightened out, to please call me. This way it didn't develop into a bickering match, or result in hanging up. Just an idea.
It is better to be alone than near or with psycho/toxic person or persons.
If that person is in your job. Find another job unless your job is wonderful and you can avoid the toxic person. Find a job where you can have your own office and avoid contact with too many people.
If it is roommate. Plan to move out. Avoid roommate if you can't move out yet.
Keywords here are - Avoid.
IF the person criticizes you a lot it is because he or she is very envious or jealous of you. Do yourself a favor and avoid the person like the plague. Don't even try to have a discussion unless it is a professonal setting and you consider the behavior to be harassment. The toxic person can't stop themselves from being envious and rude, so just avoid.
Other important factors are - Carry on with your life, do stuff you think is fun, avoid thinking of the toxic person at all times, and find time to relax and read, sleep, play video games, do art, watch Tv, dance,etc.
Last edited by artsyguy; 03-23-2008 at 03:23 PM..
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. 1) Always be cheerful to them and around them, 2) show some concern for their well-being, but not to much, 3) if they start to put you down, then just politely excuse your self. And the third step should be used everytime they attempt to be contemptible toward you, this is just showing them that your not going to invite poison into your life.
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