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I like to pee in my neighbor's garden
And hope that it doesn't his heart harden
When he looks out and sees my ass
While I water a tiny bit of his grass
I like to poop on your neighbor's stoop.
As I peek in their windows, my pants will droop.
I just get more awful with each passing year.
Too much talk about my rear.
I like to squat on their porch and crap
As it comes out, on the window I rap
To see their faces is so much fun
As I proudly point to what I've done
Then my butt I wipe on their mat
And cheerfully yell to them, How 'bout that!
Then before they come out, I run away
To start filling up for another day
Sometimes instead I use the birdbath
That's always sure to incur their wrath
In the water my doo-doo looks so forlorn
But the birdies enjoy it if last night I had corn
Holy smokes, I think that we
should start a gang that likes to pee...
On porches, verandas, and in yards.
We could be called the Peeing Bards.
We like to rhyme, that much is true.
Sometimes about flowers but mostly about poo.
I think that I shall never see...
a poem as lovely... wait, I gotta pee.
LOLOL! So, you're saying that an announcement should have been made, that the water had been turned off, with maps handed out to the nearest gas stations or other public facilities, in case guests couldn't wait until the new toilet was installed?
Does the hostess' father live too far away, to drop by on a Sunday, or on a weekday after work, to do the chore? It was a bizarre choice of timing.
And btw, this is the 2nd reference I've found on C-D today, to using one's hosts' side- or backyards as a toilet. Is this a common thing these days? Aren't there city ordnances against that? Do people really not mind if their guests leave fertilizer donations in their back yard?
I don't think it's terribly unusual. At my old house with one bathroom a certain party guest would inevitably clog the toilet and folks would end up in the side yard while he was getting it fixed.
Holy smokes, I think that we
should start a gang that likes to pee...
On porches, verandas, and in yards.
We could be called the Peeing Bards.
We like to rhyme, that much is true.
Sometimes about flowers but mostly about poo.
I think that I shall never see...
a poem as lovely... wait, I gotta pee.
I don't think it's terribly unusual. At my old house with one bathroom a certain party guest would inevitably clog the toilet and folks would end up in the side yard while he was getting it fixed.
Wow. Now I've REALLY heard everything, on C-D! Though I have noticed, that houses with only one bathroom do present a certain challenge to their guests....
Too many "Home Improvement" reruns, I reckon. My bladder would have none of that. Ten minutes later, I'd have to water an azalea bush on the way to my car.
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and folks would end up in the side yard while he was getting it fixed.
