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I'm way out of the loop with bridal/wedding showers as I have't been to one in about 10 plus years, and the last family baby shower I had just given birth and didn't attend, but sent a gift. I didn't have one as I lived on my own for many years beforehand, so I guess found it odd expecting one.
Dh has a friend whose wedding he will be in. I do not know this friend other then saying hello to him at our wedding, and recently him and his fiance came to our house and were rather rude. The entire duration of our marriage he lived 5 states away and just moved back this summer. I very loudly said hello about a minute or so after him and his fiance entered, (I was in another room) and they completely ignored me. I then very loudly said guess noone heard me and this friend said "yeah hi" without making eye contact IEven my DH stood there a little stunned.
Anyway, this friend starts texting DH asking him if I'm going to her shower, an invite I never got lol. He then has his sister, or whoever is throwing it, text me the invite saying they had problems with the mail. A few days later the invite pops up in my mailbox. I do not know his fiance, nor will I know a single person there and find it odd I was even invited. It's not like I have any connection to anyone there. DH told me to say no, so I was going to text later I won't be going. Would anyone feel the least but guilty declining this invite or know why I was invited other then for a gift? DH was in another wedding where I hardly knew the bride and I was not invited to the shower nor did I expect an invite.
If you don't want to go then don't go! You could send a gift to be polite, or not, I don't think it matters much considering you're not great friends with this person. I think some people invite every single female on the wedding guest list to the shower. Not knowing anyone else there sounds like a perfect reason not to go. I would just claim to be busy though.
I'm way out of the loop with bridal/wedding showers as I have't been to one in about 10 plus years, and the last family baby shower I had just given birth and didn't attend, but sent a gift. I didn't have one as I lived on my own for many years beforehand, so I guess found it odd expecting one.
Dh has a friend whose wedding he will be in. I do not know this friend other then saying hello to him at our wedding, and recently him and his fiance came to our house and were rather rude. The entire duration of our marriage he lived 5 states away and just moved back this summer. I very loudly said hello about a minute or so after him and his fiance entered, (I was in another room) and they completely ignored me. I then very loudly said guess noone heard me and this friend said "yeah hi" without making eye contact IEven my DH stood there a little stunned.
Anyway, this friend starts texting DH asking him if I'm going to her shower, an invite I never got lol. He then has his sister, or whoever is throwing it, text me the invite saying they had problems with the mail. A few days later the invite pops up in my mailbox. I do not know his fiance, nor will I know a single person there and find it odd I was even invited. It's not like I have any connection to anyone there. DH told me to say no, so I was going to text later I won't be going. Would anyone feel the least but guilty declining this invite or know why I was invited other then for a gift? DH was in another wedding where I hardly knew the bride and I was not invited to the shower nor did I expect an invite.
Don’t go. Why would you? Sounds like a gift grab to me.
If the wedding couple knows your husband well enough to ask him to be a groomsman at their wedding it is would be very rude NOT to ask his wife to the bridal shower.
Now you can say "No" if you do not want to attend.
BTW, yes, it does sound like they were rude to you when they visited your home.
I very loudly said hello about a minute or so after him and his fiance entered, (I was in another room) and they completely ignored me. I then very loudly said guess noone heard me and this friend said "yeah hi" without making eye contact IEven my DH stood there a little stunned.
Guests came to your home, and you didn't go to the door to greet them; but rather yelled at them from another room? And they are the rude ones?
On the shower, they probably thought it's most polite to ask, since your hubby will be in the wedding... but I don't think you have to go.
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IEven my DH stood there a little stunned. 
