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It all looked good on the outside until it no longer did. Fakebook (which I do not participate in) encourages people to trowel over the rough patches for the veneer of photographic perfection. Most people do not share their troubles or their bad hair days.
Status:
"I don't understand. But I don't care, so it works out."
(set 5 days ago)
35,622 posts, read 17,953,728 times
Reputation: 50641
Here's the story that's exactly like yours. It seems pretty likely you posted it last year and have forgotten you posted here a year ago for a very brief time.
If not, you probably want to contact this woman because you are living the same life, with the same exact down to the detail struggle, and would be a comfort to each other.
(Note: haha before anyone says good god how long did you spend trying to find that thread, it was about 3 minutes. I remembered it was posted shortly after I joined. ;D)
Who cares if she may have posted it previously? What does that have to do with anything? And it is just as likely that it is simply a similar story by a different OP.
well i'm not the 3rd sister, i'm the cousin. The cousin i'm jealous of is the youngest, she does have 2 older sisters who are also perfect. She did not get kicked out of the ivy league school, she chose to leave because she was unhappy. But yes she did marry rich...yesterday.
Apparently this is a typical scenario, i dunno.
All i know is that i'm sick of thinking about this person.
If you're really tired of thinking of about her, then stop thinking about her. Unfriend or unfollow your cousins on FB and any other social media platform where you see them. Live your own life and stop comparing yourself to her. You have a life half the world dreams of so try to enjoy it.
As others have said, what you see on FB isn't the real story. A friend posted lovely graduation and Mother's Day pics this weekend, but when we talked on the phone I heard about all the miserable family drama that took up most of their time. Screaming fights, tears, recriminations. Adult children fighting with parents and among themselves. The recent college grad with no job and lots of debt applying for retail positions.
If you can't get over it on your own, see about getting some talk therapy. You're wasting valuable time and energy on a woman who lives 3,000 miles away and has nothing to do with you. This is time with your young children you will never get back. Try to focus on what you have and be grateful for it.
Life isn't fair and you should get some therapy. You really need to worry about your own life and family and be grateful for what you have. Therapy can help with finding out why you feel this way.
Status:
"I don't understand. But I don't care, so it works out."
(set 5 days ago)
35,622 posts, read 17,953,728 times
Reputation: 50641
Quote:
Originally Posted by CarolinaMoon1
Who cares if she may have posted it previously? What does that have to do with anything? And it is just as likely that it is simply a similar story by a different OP.
If she's looking for advice on an internet forum, it matters a great deal if she was dealing with this exact same issue exactly a year ago, and can't let it go.
That matters. Vs. someone who, say, was having a bad day and posted this.
Ruminating on this for a whole year is different, and would require a different response. Therapy would probably be a good idea, instead of "hey, look on the bright side", the way you would someone who hasn't been chewing on this for at least an entire year.
I’m not sure why her life has anything to do with yours. We are all a product of our life choices. Do you really want to just be the wife of some rich guy? You say your married but don’t mention your husband. You mention your children but seem to idolize her situational wealth. What about your life besides your job are you not ok with?
We are NOT always a product of our life choices. Sometimes, sidewinders hit us out of the blue and there's not a thing in the world that we can do about it.
As someone who is surviving a horrible tragedy, I have met many other people who have (and are) surviving tragedies. It's not uncommon for people like us to look at the landscape of our lives and wonder, how did this happen? It's not uncommon for people like us to look at other people's lives and wonder, why were they spared this misery?
Human misery is not doled out in equal measures. Although the OP is not sharing the story of every detail of his/her life, perhaps he/she is dealing with something grievous and burdensome.
OK, I guess there might be multiple people's envious of someone else's lives.
I went through a phase like that. I wish I didn't, but it happened.
Listen, what you need to understand is that there are no fairy tales, no happy endings. No living happily ever afters. Don't envy your cousin. You don't know what her life is like. It might be glitter and such but you have no idea how she actually feels. if shes happy. And who cares? Marriages are hard work, yes, even those of the wealthy. They are also humans and prone to illnesses, accidents and catastrophes like the rest of us. Touch the wood something happens to your cousin's husband.
I personally feel accomplished for what I am, for my career, for being a strong independent woman. I care a lot about what I want to do, projects, places i want to visit, spending time with friends, doing things that I really enjoy doing.
Believe my dear, it is such a waste of time to compare yourself with anybody else. Happiness is not a pill, or magic wand that you use to make your wishes come true. money don't guarantee happiness.
I don't know if this helps but we all wish what we don't have: blond people wish they had brown hair, fat people wish they were slim, others wish for better cars, better jobs, bigger houses. Nobody/or very few are actually happy with what they have. You dont know anything about your cousins life. she might be happy, she might be not.
If you put all this energy you use envying other people in bettering yourself and your family you would be happier. As I said, when I was young I envied people left and right. After seeing them going through difficult situations and not being able to do half of the things I did -at work and in life in general or helping them (they were weak and I was strong) - I understood that you can't live somebody else's life but your own's and you can make yours better.
Life is with ups and downs. Nobody stays happy for ever, including the people you envy.
i'd try meditation if i were you. I'd focus on myself, the inner you. if things don't get better I'd go to a therapist.
Last edited by XRiteMA98; 05-14-2018 at 12:43 PM..
Reason: typos
If she's looking for advice on an internet forum, it matters a great deal if she was dealing with this exact same issue exactly a year ago, and can't let it go.
That matters. Vs. someone who, say, was having a bad day and posted this.
Ruminating on this for a whole year is different, and would require a different response. Therapy would probably be a good idea, instead of "hey, look on the bright side", the way you would someone who hasn't been chewing on this for at least an entire year.
Thanks, Nancy Drew.
Last edited by CarolinaMoon1; 05-14-2018 at 03:22 PM..
Well, unfortunately America is geared toward always flaunting richer people at us, teasing us with stories of lottery winners, and assessing people based on their financial assets. That won't change.
The one thing that stands out in your unhappy post that you can change is your job. You hate your job. So spend some time thinking about how you can change that part of your life. That would be a good start.
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