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I much prefer talking about concepts, theories, ideas than people, places and things but as long as there's a relatively reasonable measure of give and take in a conversation most anything can be tolerable if not entertaining.
This thread makes me wonder if the whole country is full of irritable and agitated people. Perhaps when folks are in their 80s or older and forgotten by most others they will be happy to hear about someone’s dog, grandchildren or favorite sports team.
Occasionally I run into someone who regales me with accounts of her life with no context or preamble. I have no idea who she is referring to or what she is talking about. Sometines it is as if she is resuming a previous conversation we have never had. Another poster mentions talking at people. This is an example of that.
I don’t know what causes this, but it sure makes me avoid interactions with said person, who is usually female.
I also agree with another poster who mentions voice. Yeah. Some people have unpleasant voices. A long, boring story told by someone with a grating voice is a miserable experience.
But here’s the thing—none of us is perfect. If we are close socially, if the person is a good person, a good friend, or a much loved relative, then we have to overlook the irritating bits.
(In case you couldn’t guess, I’m going through this mental process now with someone I truly love and admire. I am fighting irritation and some disappointment, but I am not giving in to these feelings. This person is too fine a hunan being, and too important to me personally.)
I'm the kind of person who seems to attract folks who end up telling me their whole life stories. I find it interesting, but current topics like complaining, bragging or sports will leave me bored. What I really hate are the talkers who won't take a breath or let me get a word in edgewise.
I had a friend like this....I'd put the phone down and go about my business. When I got back on the phone, she was still talking and hadn't realized I had not been listening the entire time. Now THAT'S what I call boring!
I used to work with a woman that always talked about her daughter playing high school softball. After a few days I mentioned my niece made All County and is getting some good college offers. She never mentioned her daughter again. I don't have a niece.
That is funny. I tried something similar with my MIL. She loves to brag about living in a certain town and is very influenced by appearances. I am not. So I am in a new neighborhood and started telling her about my doctor, lawyer and teacher neighbors. It didn't work. I guess it doesn't matter if it's not "her" story, lol.
Quote:
Originally Posted by hertfordshire
You needed this thread for that?
I KNOW the whole country is full of irritable and agitated people.
I like people and talking with them. I like it best when we can find some type of common interest to talk about. Sadly that does not always happen. Topics that make me glaze over:
Anyone who goes on and on about a story especially very detailed stories about people I don't know.
Braggers. I have no issues when a wealthy person talks about their trip, their lives etc. but I don't need you to name drop all the time. "I bought a Michael Kors purse, I have a BMW, I love my Rolex etc."....really people it does not impress me.
Sports and video games.
Drama. I hate drama. I am a fixer and it drives me crazy when people complain about the same things over and over but never change anything they do.
Drinking.
Analyzing and finding the "meaning" about a picture, movie, artwork etc. Just enjoy it. I don't need to dissect everything I like. It kind of takes some of the enjoyment out of it. My grandson when he was younger wanted to discuss the movie The Boxtrolls. I had nothing...and I mean nothing to say The movie was horrible and he wanted to dissect it. Seriously I felt like 2 hours got sucked out of my life. Of course I didn't tell him that.
I had dinner with family a few years ago, and my 20-something nephew decided to tell us about every single computer he's ever owned. He went on and on. I considered interrupting him to describe every computer I've had, but that seemed even more boring.
OK, so when it comes to close family and friends, what is it OK to discuss? I get the impression that most topics are fine as long as there is give and take; no effort to monopolize a conversation.
It's also a social/conversational skill to smoothly and politely change the subject if one is bored. It takes practice.
Please name some. I'll list one myself soon. Let's exclude discussions just between members of the immediate family.
Insurance. Why oh why are people so interested in insurance? In the deductible amount, how much coverage you get, and how much you pay a month? Who cares?! I seem to run into this a lot lately. I change the subject.
I also get bored with anti intellectual types.
Last edited by NDak15; 09-03-2018 at 11:13 AM..
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It didn't work. I guess it doesn't matter if it's not "her" story, lol.
