Questions about a friend at work and a Facebook blocking me incident after moving to new job (girlfriend, female)

[Wolverine607]

Ok so I had a job for a little over 6 years. I just moved onto another company for a different job 1 month ago.

So at that company this one friend in addition to another even better friend I had and his buddy (who left my old work almost 1 year ago before I did) were great together there, especially, me, Jim and Frank, before Frank's departure almost 1 year ago.

So I miss them all and always kept in touch and talked outside of work sometimes through texting with my 2 best buddies (even while working for the old company) and on Facebook Messenger with the other as.

Lets call my 2 best friends (these are not real names of course and do not want to use to protect privacy of them and myself) Fred and Jim. The other also very close friend is a female named Jane, but probably not quite as close as the 2 guys.

Now I always got along great with Fred and Jim and they were the best friends I had in a super long time and me and Jim still kept in touch with Frank even after he left that company 1 year ago.

Jane was also a good friend of mine. We did have a couple of heated arguments i the past, but not often and she mentioned recently she would always be my friend regardless or not matter what I say.

Unlike Fred and Jim, Jane did not have unlimited text messaging so my communication with her came almost all through Facebook.

She stated she always had my back and would let me know if anyone tried to hurt me or suspected it. She also had my back and is close with Jim and Fred and we talked to try and right an office politic disaster a year ago that undermined both of them.

Now Jane was not nor ever a girlfriend just a regular good friend. She is very nice and I did talk to her a lot on FB Messenger in spurts even while working there sometimes.

We would not see each other again very often and the only way now to keep in touch is Facebook as she does not have unlimited texting as I moved to another job and not the company she still works at.

I am a big college sports fan and a huge Michigan Wolverines fan. I hate the Spartans and Buckeyes and am so sick of losing to both of them in football and it ruins the sport to me that I am almost ready to stop watching college football. Jane is more of a MSU fan although she has at tims stated she does not care that much. But sometimes she never understands why I hate MSU so much and take the rivalry so seriously. She seemed kind of inconsistent on that and on some other things about not wanting to tell someone something as trivial as the square footage or even whether the house she roomates with is big or small.

She has mentioned before she does not understand why I get so upset for something as trivial as football where at other times she did understand that is how I am.

Now when MSU had a close win against a poor opponent the last week, there was a post about a nice win by MSU and I gloated about them barley beating a team they should have blown out. As a Michigan fan, I would have been more concerned and upset if we barely beat a team that was a mid major than losing by a TD to Notre Dame on the road and never would have thought it was a nice win even for my team. However I did delete the post I made which never had any swearing or just gloating after like 30 minutes before I even saw her online. But she somehow saw it which leads to my point below.

Then everything went to heck. She sent me a message getting angry at me and stating if I want to rub it in when she enjoyed an MSU win even though it was barely against a bad team, she would not feel bad about rubbing a Michigan loss in my face. Then I could not even reply to say sorry as she blocked me. I was very upset.

I had no way to contact her and her old phone number she gave me she no longer used and my friends Jim and Frank did not have anyway either and thought the block was a mistake.

I had to find a different Facebook account and contact her to say sorry and how I erased it and promised not to do that again. She then responded a day later rationalizing the block and stating it is not the end of our friendship, she just does not want to hear any negativity and such and she would unblock my after football season was done. She then blocked that account after the message (An old account I never used anymore which was from a forum ID to keep in touch with friends from file sharing boards of the early 2000s when the 2010s began).

I was furious and in my mind if she was gonna act that way, my friendship with Jane was over. So I created another account and was lucky enough to catch her on messenger and have further discussion about it in real time exchanging texts back and forth or the matter may have never been resolved and potentially still could be blocked lol.

She stated this was not an end to friendship but how could it not be when we had no other way to talk and do not see each other at work anymore. She asked why she was so important to me and I am thinking like WTF? Jane stated to me she was always friends no matter what but now she wanted to completely cut off access to the only communication channel we had especially after departing the old company we worked together at.

I mentioned our friendship will end if you do not unblock me and promised even before I would not talk anything about Michigan or MSU football much with her and she stated I was being spiteful and she would be available for me to talk to after football season but if I want to be spiteful she she wished me best of luck in my life. I told her to do the right thing if she really is my friend and unblock me.

There was more argument about why was she so important to me and I mentioned if you really are a friend, you would unblock me. I stated friends do not do something like that to each other such as block them over 1 little comment I regretted I made. Then she responded stating friends also do not threaten each other and she stated she valued our friendship so she unblocked me on Facebook, but she felt I bullied her into doing it and stated if I ever try to do something like that again into bullying her to do something she does not want she would never talk to me again.

So anyways I was unblocked. Then from my primary account I could message her again and explained the situation more and wanted to make sure we were again on good terms and had to explain why I was so upset she would do something like that.

She mentioned we were ok, but that I did not seem to understand that she was not trying to end our friendship, but trying to protect herself from my negativity (regarding me hating MSU and loving Michigan which I actually rarely if ever mention on messenger to her but did bring it up at work to everyone not just her that I will have to stop watching college football if Michigan keeps losing to MSU I assumed by her comment before parenthesis). But then stated we are connected again and to have a good rest of day.


So ok, I think she is a good friend, but she does seem unstable and strange at times and that was bad and no way around it especially since there was no other communication channel to talk. How in the world can you block someone and still consider the your friend when you do not even work a the same place anymore an have no other communication channels as she does not have unlimited texting and does not use Twitter or Linkedin messaging systems nor email?

So do you think this is a real friend or not. It just seemed childish and petty and wrong for her to block me when I had not other way to talk so of course I was gonna be very angry and she did not seem to understand why I wa so upset she blocked me.

Do you think she is a real friend or not? And is it odd someone would state you are a friend and wonder why you would be upset that they blocked you on Facebook so you really had no way to talk to them elsehow. And for her to consider my spiteful that I was gonna end friendship unless she unblocked me quickly. And I also stated I had regretted inviting her to a home cookout in the Summer with my in addition to my other 2 even better friends during the fight to get her to unblock me if she really was a friend and she mentioned I was no acting like an adult and being childish. She was childish for blocking me and me having to threaten to end our friendship if she did not unblock me.

And the awkward thing is, Jane is the same person who gave me a hug and made cookies and let me take them home for me on my last day and did lots of other good things for me and others now and in the past and stated we would always be friends forever no matter what she or I said.

Your thoughts n the anonymous world. This was a very rough and turbulent experience for me. But I am glad the friendship at least seems to be repaired after talking with her and being connected on Facebook again, but it was a very near experience of never being bale to get a hold of her again except through Jim or Frank and even they did not have her contact phone just Facebook friends.

[hertfordshire]

Honestly? You both sound childish and petty. How old are you?

[BobCaldwell]

I'll go so far as to add the words 'stupid' and 'pointless'.

[ClaraC]

May I shorten this for you? Ain't nobody got time to read the OP.

I used to work with Jim, Frank, and Jane and considered them all friends, although Jim and Fred more so than Jane. After leaving the company last month, Jane and I got into an argument on social media about football team allegiancies, and Jane blocked me on social media. Although Jane has now unblocked me and still considers us to be friends, are we?

[hertfordshire]

Originally Posted by ClaraC

May I shorten this for you? Ain't nobody got time to read the OP.

I used to work with Jim, Frank, and Jane and considered them all friends, although Jim and Fred more so than Jane. After leaving the company last month, Jane and I got into an argument on social media about football team allegiancies, and Jane blocked me on social media. Although Jane has now unblocked me and still considers us to be friends, are we?

You're currently my favorite person on C-D.

[BirdieBelle]

So ... in addition to endless gloating and needling about football teams (nothing more obnoxious than a Big10 fan ) you managed to use three difference Facebook accounts to contact this woman even after she blocked you???

Please leave Jane alone and do unto others as you would have them do unto you. You wouldn't want Buckeye fans rubbing anything in your face when you're just trying to see your niece's recital photos on Facebook.

Besides, Michigan fans have NO REASON to be gloating over after the Outback Bowl meltdown last year. Just knock it off.

[Blondebaerde]

Originally Posted by ClaraC

May I shorten this for you? Ain't nobody got time to read the OP.

I used to work with Jim, Frank, and Jane and considered them all friends, although Jim and Fred more so than Jane. After leaving the company last month, Jane and I got into an argument on social media about football team allegiancies, and Jane blocked me on social media. Although Jane has now unblocked me and still considers us to be friends, are we?

Ought to give this lady the Pour le Mérite, really saves my drama-baiting time each day.

Answer: who gives a ___?

I thought all threads on (cough) social media were verboten, because all are the lowest possible comedy...or maybe that's another part of C-D. All make about as much sense, that being a dial at 0 moving the other way.

[Parnassia]

Wow, and I was worried that MY universe was getting too small. All that time lost forever writing about football team pettiness. Seriously?

[hertfordshire]

Originally Posted by Blondebaerde

I thought all threads on (cough) social media were verboten, because all are the lowest possible comedy...or maybe that's another part of C-D.

Mods apparently did away with that rule.

[JanND]

OP...she is a better friend to you than you are to her.