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No. Don't take what I'm saying out of context. All I'm saying is that from a practical standpoint, it would be more practical for the bigger family to invite the smaller family. Because it's less work that way.
Correction: It's less work for your family. But they still had to work you in, so they've put a lot of effort for people who weren't interested in reciprocating. Not a "practical" standpoint but a self-centered one.
Quote:
Originally Posted by Einhander
Well. But the thing is I was a kid. I didn't know what was going on. All I knew was every Christmas, we went to their house. It was a given. But I was young, I didn't know what the deal was.
Now i'm older and I'm at least trying. I messaged her, got a nice response, and then nothing after.
I did invite her over to meet the new family. So in a way I'm doing more invitations than my parents did. But she didn't even officially decline it. She just didn't read it period. So I'm stuck in the middle. My dad sees me making progress by meeting all kinds of family from the internet and he tells me to try to get his favorite cousin back.
At first he said he had no interest in meeting the new people. He said he would rather see his cousin even if she had no interest in seeing him. But after he met the new family, I overheard him say to my mom they are so much nicer than the ones who snubbed us. Kinda hard for me to help him out, since they lost her phone number.
Why is your dad putting it on you to "get his favorite cousin back"? This whole thing is just bizarre.
Correction: It's less work for your family. But they still had to work you in, so they've put a lot of effort for people who weren't interested in reciprocating. Not a "practical" standpoint but a self-centered one.
Why is your dad putting it on you to "get his favorite cousin back"? This whole thing is just bizarre.
I asked him why he doesn't give her a call and he says it's my mom's job.
No. Don't take what I'm saying out of context. All I'm saying is that from a practical standpoint, it would be more practical for the bigger family to invite the smaller family. Because it's less work that way.
It's less work FOR YOU, but certainly NOT for the other family!
So according to you, only the bigger families should be always hosting and inviting the smaller families...
I asked him why he doesn't give her a call and he says it's my mom's job.
Quote:
Originally Posted by Einhander
He blamed my mom and said she’s in charge of making plans. He said he’s kept in touch by having her on Facebook.
Just... No...
You go do you... Build some kind of relationship with these cousins of yours. At least you're putting in effort. And that counts a lot.
Your dad is putting ZERO effort and expects everyone else to do his part for him. People like this are generally very difficult to be around and that could be likely why that family member(s) are just done trying with him. Please don't put forth any more energy into trying to "rebuild" his relationship with family--that's something he needs to do himself. And no, just because he's now on FB doesn't mean he's "kept in touch" by having her on his list. Good grief, all about the bare minimums, isn't he?
No. Don't take what I'm saying out of context. All I'm saying is that from a practical standpoint, it would be more practical for the bigger family to invite the smaller family. Because it's less work that way.
As others have pointed out, it's only less work for you. Quite selfish.
I stand by my statement. You all need to quit with the entitled attitude.
I met 12 new cousins from 23 and me. And they are related to the cousin that doesn't see me anymore. Many of them told me their jaws dropped when they got my message. They all are descendants of my father's new cousin, who never knew any of her extended family. This was all for their mom & grandma. She was so happy.
Also, my sister met her cousin who she grew up with and didn't know she was a relative. It was odd for her, but great.
I'm making moves. I'm gonna see if I get a response from u know who on FB when I post about this tomorrow.
But the point is, that we all had fun. I don't see why people tell me they can't find anything in common with their cousins. I didn't have anything in common with them, but we found things to talk about. So many hugs and laughs. One of them is kind of a neighbor. And he said his jaws dropped when he heard he lived right next to us. He told me that he's gonna come next week and empty our fridge lol.
I'm beside myself right now. I touched other's hearts. Now let's just hope that u know who reacts to this. I won't post anything negative, but I hope she feels a little bit guilty for snubbing us all these years. Not nice.
Quote:
Originally Posted by Einhander
For her whole family snubbing us all these years. My way of showing her that now I have more family I see than she does and I don't need her.
OMG. On the other forum you admit you are too obsessed about this poor aunt and now you are making ANOTHER thread about her?
YOU NEED HELP.
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