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Old 01-10-2019, 02:58 AM
 
6,028 posts, read 2,774,016 times
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True incident:
What could have taken 1 minute of phone call turned into half hour of clarification and text service delays.

I think text is fine for quick confirmations. Such as: Dear, at the store. Do we need milk?

But good lordy...don't text me that our grandma went to the hospital and suddenly after I ask what room # or her status. ..I get a two hour "text can't be sent at this time". Causes a bit of angst.

Spare me the emojis and the text speak. All the shorten words makes it sound silly if you actually pronounce the message.

Use your voice ...it's what graham bell invented the phone for!
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Old 01-10-2019, 07:20 AM
 
13,074 posts, read 17,640,032 times
Reputation: 19580
Quote:
Originally Posted by srjth View Post
Well see the problem is, she wants me to do all the damn texting. She will throw out a question or a "How are you?" and expect me to do all the talking/texting. I know this woman, it's how our friendship has been since the beginning (when we saw each other often). But now, I'm not going to hold the phone with my two hands all damn day to text her and entertain her. It takes too long and there's a lot to say (she knows this). If she wants to hear about what I'm up to, she has to call me. And if she doesn't have time to call because she has to wash her car every day, then I guess she won't hear from me then. I refuse to entertain her by text.
Where is the problem. You do not text. She does not talk. All is well.
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Old 01-10-2019, 02:10 PM
 
5,316 posts, read 3,373,943 times
Reputation: 13348
Quote:
Originally Posted by Nov3 View Post

True incident:
What could have taken 1 minute of phone call turned into half hour of clarification and text service delays.

I think text is fine for quick confirmations. Such as: Dear, at the store. Do we need milk?

But good lordy...don't text me that our grandma went to the hospital and suddenly after I ask what room # or her status. ..I get a two hour "text can't be sent at this time". Causes a bit of angst.

Spare me the emojis and the text speak. All the shorten words makes it sound silly if you actually pronounce the message.

Use your voice ...it's what graham bell invented the phone for!
What about email communication in this discussion and thread?

Why isn't email viewed as an alternative?
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Old 01-10-2019, 02:50 PM
 
2,512 posts, read 1,304,866 times
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I think this is pretty common these days. I call it Communication Incompatiblity

I like to keep in touch with longtime friends (in between seeing each other once or twice a year) on email. Like I'll write a decent email saying what I'm up to and I would love an email back in kind, whenever the person can get around to it. These things used to be called letters I have friends that I do this with. Great!

I also have friends who will not write an email back. No way no how. Some friends only want to keep in touch by liking each other pictures and commenting on Facebook. Well, I'm not on Facebook. I have another friend who likes to do crazy texting thing once in a while. I have another friend who likes to call but she calls and if you don't pick up the phone when she calls well good luck calling her back because she never picks up her phone.

You get the idea. Anyway, I've just given up on keeping up with certain people at this point. Everyone seems to have their way that they like to communicate and no one seems very willing to do anything different to accommodate anyone else (and that includes me)
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Old 01-10-2019, 02:58 PM
 
5,316 posts, read 3,373,943 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by bookspage View Post

I think this is pretty common these days. I call it Communication Incompatiblity

I like to keep in touch with longtime friends (in between seeing each other once or twice a year) on email. Like I'll write a decent email saying what I'm up to and I would love an email back in kind, whenever the person can get around to it. These things used to be called letters I have friends that I do this with. Great!

I also have friends who will not write an email back. No way no how. Some friends only want to keep in touch by liking each other pictures and commenting on Facebook. Well, I'm not on Facebook. I have another friend who likes to do crazy texting thing once in a while. I have another friend who likes to call but she calls and if you don't pick up the phone when she calls well good luck calling her back because she never picks up her phone.

You get the idea. Anyway, I've just given up on keeping up with certain people at this point. Everyone seems to have their way that they like to communicate and no one seems very willing to do anything different to accommodate anyone else (and that includes me)
very well-said, bookspage! I think you describe it very well....with insight.
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Old 01-10-2019, 04:31 PM
 
14,396 posts, read 17,241,021 times
Reputation: 11188
Quote:
Originally Posted by bookspage View Post
I think this is pretty common these days. I call it Communication Incompatiblity

I like to keep in touch with longtime friends (in between seeing each other once or twice a year) on email. Like I'll write a decent email saying what I'm up to and I would love an email back in kind, whenever the person can get around to it. These things used to be called letters I have friends that I do this with. Great!

I also have friends who will not write an email back. No way no how. Some friends only want to keep in touch by liking each other pictures and commenting on Facebook. Well, I'm not on Facebook. I have another friend who likes to do crazy texting thing once in a while. I have another friend who likes to call but she calls and if you don't pick up the phone when she calls well good luck calling her back because she never picks up her phone.

You get the idea. Anyway, I've just given up on keeping up with certain people at this point. Everyone seems to have their way that they like to communicate and no one seems very willing to do anything different to accommodate anyone else (and that includes me)

Yes, I think this about sums it up.
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Old 01-10-2019, 06:57 PM
 
48 posts, read 15,294 times
Reputation: 65
Quote:
Originally Posted by bookspage View Post
I think this is pretty common these days. I call it Communication Incompatiblity

I like to keep in touch with longtime friends (in between seeing each other once or twice a year) on email. Like I'll write a decent email saying what I'm up to and I would love an email back in kind, whenever the person can get around to it. These things used to be called letters I have friends that I do this with. Great!

I also have friends who will not write an email back. No way no how. Some friends only want to keep in touch by liking each other pictures and commenting on Facebook. Well, I'm not on Facebook. I have another friend who likes to do crazy texting thing once in a while. I have another friend who likes to call but she calls and if you don't pick up the phone when she calls well good luck calling her back because she never picks up her phone.

You get the idea. Anyway, I've just given up on keeping up with certain people at this point. Everyone seems to have their way that they like to communicate and no one seems very willing to do anything different to accommodate anyone else (and that includes me)
1-2 times a year? gross. How do you still call them friends? Hang out once a month, call a few times a month, text at least once a week to know they are still around is my opinion of a friend, besides the other stuff like being there for them in their worst and best times and being as supportive as you can be. Maybe my opinion is a little different since I have friends I hang out with once a month, call a few times a month, text frequently.
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Old 01-10-2019, 07:07 PM
 
48 posts, read 15,294 times
Reputation: 65
I am 34.

edit- Oh you deleted your post.
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Old 01-10-2019, 07:13 PM
 
2,512 posts, read 1,304,866 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by matisse12 View Post
very well-said, bookspage! I think you describe it very well....with insight.
Thank you for the nice comment
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Old 01-10-2019, 08:27 PM
 
Location: Tucson AZ & Leipzig, Germany
2,331 posts, read 7,727,863 times
Reputation: 3451
Quote:
Originally Posted by matisse12 View Post
What about email communication in this discussion and thread?

Why isn't email viewed as an alternative?
Email is a good alternative, if both people involved are fairly decent writers. I have a lady friend in Germany, 8 hours time difference from me. We met last summer while we were both on a bicycle tour in Germany, but it was just by coincidence. After meeting, I had dinner with her and her sister, and met them the next morning for breakfast. My new friend asked to exchange cell phone numbers. I sensed there was a good connection and some energy between us.

I speak and write German better than she speaks English, so we sent a few friendly, short text messages back and forth over a period of a week or so. I asked her if we could switch to email, because while writing email, I can open other web pages if needed to translate a few words or check grammar and spelling. I had my little laptop on the trip, so it was much easier to use my laptop keyboard for more than a few sentences of writing.

My lady friend is a school teacher, well educated, and a very prolific and good writer. For me, I can write in German quite well, and it is sometimes easier to write than speak because I have more time to put down the words. After a few more days of sending an email per day, she invited me to visit. I am retired, and had 7 more weeks left on my tourist visa. So I pedaled my bike to the nearest train station, bought a ticket to her town, rolled by bike and stuff onto the train, and met her on the station platform 2 hours later. It felt like a Hallmark movie script.

What I thought would be a 2 day visit turned into a 6 week visit. It was a good summer, and we had some good times together. It gave me enough time to learn a lot about my new lady friend, and that she was a very independent woman who did not want to get married or into a dedicated one-on-one partnership. But she did not want to just end things at the end of the visit, and neither did I.

Four months later, we are still keeping in touch, mainly by email. We send a few photos with What's App, or some short greetings. We Skype once a month or so, but she is busy during the school year and she has lots of family (3 kids ages 19, 26 & 30) and friends to keep up with. I can call her on my cell phone at no cost, so maybe once a week or two we chat on the cell phone.

One thing for sure, writing email or using another language to maintain a relationship is intensive language training. I am on a whole other level from where I was 4 months ago.

In about 7 more weeks, I am off to Germany again, and we'll see where the Hallmark movie script goes from there.
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