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Old 01-15-2019, 01:34 PM
 
4,874 posts, read 2,656,674 times
Reputation: 8891

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Quote:
Originally Posted by gurlbye View Post
I will give it until February. They're talking about getting married, but I don't see HOW IN THE WORLD THEY CAN AFFORD IT. Unless she is paying for the note/rent.
UGH
I think part of the issue is that your imposing your judgement on their relationship and the worth on weather they or she can afford it. You should limit your judgement and requests to how it immediately impacts you.

If she wants to fund a bum then fine but donít let it be at your expense. Conflating the two separate issue of going to clowd the water per say.

 
Old 01-15-2019, 01:46 PM
 
Location: Fuquay Varina
4,530 posts, read 6,600,055 times
Reputation: 11197
I think you should start acting like you find her bf attractive. Then she will make sure he isnt around as much lol
 
Old 01-15-2019, 02:08 PM
 
14,396 posts, read 17,244,758 times
Reputation: 11188
This sounds like a doozy to me.
 
Old 01-15-2019, 02:25 PM
 
12,241 posts, read 13,464,537 times
Reputation: 14075
Quote:
Originally Posted by SVTLightning View Post
I think you should start acting like you find her bf attractive. Then she will make sure he isnt around as much lol
Haha!

Yeah, that will make him leave.
 
Old 01-15-2019, 02:29 PM
 
12 posts, read 5,287 times
Reputation: 10
Quote:
Originally Posted by funymann View Post
Haha!

Yeah, that will make him leave.


haha, that would be terrible!
 
Old 01-15-2019, 06:55 PM
 
1,949 posts, read 559,899 times
Reputation: 2759
Tell her to move out and find a financially stable house-mate to help with the mortgage.

Get her name off the deed.
 
Old 01-16-2019, 02:58 AM
 
12,241 posts, read 13,464,537 times
Reputation: 14075
Quote:
Originally Posted by gurlbye View Post
haha, that would be terrible!
Honestly, it’s time to sell. Part ways.

I’m sure it was a fun experience to do with your sister but it’s come to the end of that road.

That guy is going to weasel his way in and ruin your credit.

Sell, move out and wish your sister well.
 
Old 01-16-2019, 09:31 AM
 
Location: Northern Virginia
5,071 posts, read 5,337,064 times
Reputation: 12528
Quote:
Originally Posted by gurlbye View Post
I'm thinking of having a conversation with my sister, but I brought it up before and she got really angry.
The conversation you need to have is about the house. Not about her BF, her relationship nor your opinion on either of those.

In fact, this conversation is long overdue. What would happen in this situation should have been discussed and agreed upon (probably best in writing) prior the two of you buying a house together. That was a mistake. Don't compound that mistake by assuming what will happen to the house when/if either of you get married.

Presumably, when either of you marry, you would contribute a share to the new home's mortgage or rent. So expecting the first person who marries to double their housing expense for a full year is ridiculous.

You need to sit down with your sister (and just your sister), and have a calm and rational discussion about her plans for her half of the house when she does marry (no matter to whom). And you need to talk about your plans for your half of the house should you marry.

It would not surprise me in the least that she plans to have him move in when they marry. So you need to be emotionally prepared to have that discussion in a calm and reasonable manner. It may be helpful to write down your objections and what you'd like to say ahead of time since we tend to forget those things in the "heat of battle" so to speak.

From what I see these are your options:

1.) You buy out her half of the house
2.) She and her spouse buy out your half of the house
3.) Both of you sell the house

In regards to her guest staying for extended periods, again you need to have a calm and reasonable discussion. If it's about an increase in costs for food or utilities - look at your utility bills from before he started staying over several nights a week to now and determine how much those costs have increased. And then ask your sister to up her portion to cover the increase. Just know that by doing that you are then giving your "ok" for him to stay there for extended periods of time.
 
Old 01-16-2019, 10:26 AM
 
8,527 posts, read 7,069,756 times
Reputation: 8968
Not much you can do if the co owner isn’t on board.
You need to sit down and have a discusssion about expectations and boundaries surrounding the home ownership.

Until you do you have no idea where anyone stands to know what you should do next.
 
Old 01-16-2019, 11:26 AM
 
1,959 posts, read 1,290,968 times
Reputation: 3367
Buying a house with sis sounds like a bad idea. Buy her out. Or draw a strong line. I had a roomate once (I owned the house) who had his girlfriend over all the time. I couldn't stand it and it built up a lot of animosity.

Once or maybe twice a week should be it.
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