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Old 01-29-2019, 07:36 AM
 
16,797 posts, read 14,542,431 times
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I'm actually afraid for this AirBnB host. How long before the OP snaps and decides to "make things even" in a physical way? So much sickness in this thread, even if it is a troll.

 
Old 01-30-2019, 11:02 PM
 
359 posts, read 188,372 times
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I decided to open up to my host/landlord/roommate/friend, umm maybe the last one's a stretch to discuss my future of living in her house along with a couple of things I noticed.

1. I mentioned how it's been 2 weeks since we agreed that she would avoid talking on the phone after 11:00pm, especially considering the fact I do 10-12 hour tiring shifts nowadays, am away a lot, and just want to be able to relax in peace when I do get "home". She said she'd try but there might be some "special situations" where it's necessary to talk late. Remember there's a gap under her bedroom door and I hear her even from downstairs. Lately I noticed that despite us discussing this issue a number of times, she always goes back on her word.

2. I brought up trust. I got her to repeat that she trusts me, right? I also told her, you know I will never hurt you like your ex husband did, right? And she nodded in agreement. Good. So I continued. Then I told her how I noticed she behaved strangely when we are both getting ready for bed. I generally give her space to shower/wash her feet (remember she does both with her bathroom and bedroom doors open, and often after midnight or even 1:00am. By giving her space, I mean I stay in my room, downstairs, or just avoid the upstairs common areas. But now and then, my curiosity gets the best of me and I want to see how much she trusts me (or not). So the other night I stripped my bed and started making it from scratch, sheet by sheet, blanket by blanket, leaving my door open so I could also have a view of the hallway. I heard my host/landlord/roommate finish showering and she turned the light off in her bedroom which indicates to me she's about to walk across the hall to her bedroom. But this time I noticed she was silent all of a sudden and didn't walk. I made up my bed slowly hoping she would walk across the hall...still nothing. I went to my bathroom, closed the door and only THEN did I hear her scurry to her bedroom and slam the door behind her.


Hmm...she seems to be sending conflicting signals. When she's dressed and we're working on stuff together in close proximity, she teases me with an eyeful of forbidden fruit. But when that same fruit has a thinner barrier (nightgown) and I'm not helping her as she finishes showering, all of a sudden she wants to hide from my eyes? I'm confused on how to interpret her behavior. I tried to get her to talk about it but she said how she acts at night, is not something I can ask her to change. It doesn't look like the trust test will be happening anytime soon.

Last edited by sedonaverde; 01-30-2019 at 11:53 PM..
 
Old 01-30-2019, 11:29 PM
 
12,632 posts, read 7,551,107 times
Reputation: 23786
Quote:
Originally Posted by sedonaverde View Post
Hmm...she seems to be sending conflicting signals. When she needs my help building furniture, hanging up light fixtures, being the handyma'am around the house, she's semi friendly and even listens to my suggestions to wear loose shirts to give her skin some ventilation. Then she invariably bends down and shows me what I like. But why is it that when she's getting ready for bed, she acts so weirdly? Could she really not be aware of the fact that she's exposing her undergarments to my eyes when she bends down or could she be doing it on purpose because she knows that whenever she asks me for help, I will say yes. Whereas if she's walking down the hall and has less clothing on (I believe she's nude under her nightgown because I once bumped into her in the kitchen with it on and she wasn't wearing a bra), I'm not helping her at that time, so she feels she "has to" cover up and hide from me because I don't deserve to see her dressed down at that very moment? So when I tried to discuss her strange behavior where she hides in the dark preventing my eyes from enjoying her pajamas and possibly a little more, she told me there's no reason for me to ask her about that. Hmmmmm...what is she trying to tell me?

I'm puzzled.
No, she probably doesn't think you are being creepy and staring down her shirt every chance you get. So when she runs from the bathroom to her bedroom, it is because she is trying to be modest.
 
Old 01-31-2019, 12:02 AM
 
359 posts, read 188,372 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Sundaydrive00 View Post
No, she probably doesn't think you are being creepy and staring down her shirt every chance you get. So when she runs from the bathroom to her bedroom, it is because she is trying to be modest.

That's what I don't get. She keeps putting herself in compromising situations and it's as if she likes the attention. Let's face it. She should be paying me for all the services I provide her. But she doesn't do it with money because she's so stingy, so instead she does it with her body. There's no way you can convince me that she doesn't know what she's doing when she wears that clothing.
 
Old 01-31-2019, 07:17 AM
 
Location: Los Angeles
12,184 posts, read 10,359,091 times
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She honestly sounds like she is terrified of you. I'd love to read her thoughts on this whole situation. I'm thinking it might be portrayed a bit differently than we are being told here. Please leave her alone.
 
Old 01-31-2019, 08:59 AM
 
4,039 posts, read 2,616,414 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Mr_Geek View Post
She honestly sounds like she is terrified of you. I'd love to read her thoughts on this whole situation. I'm thinking it might be portrayed a bit differently than we are being told here. Please leave her alone.
I agree she sounds like she's very uncomfortable with the situation.

Quote:
Originally Posted by sedonaverde View Post
That's what I don't get. She keeps putting herself in compromising situations and it's as if she likes the attention. Let's face it. She should be paying me for all the services I provide her. But she doesn't do it with money because she's so stingy, so instead she does it with her body. There's no way you can convince me that she doesn't know what she's doing when she wears that clothing.

I don't think this is the case at all. With almost any top that has a scoop neck or is open at the neck you can get a look at someone's cleavage if you're at the right angle. I think you're way off base and seeing what you want to see.

Also based on your previous posts in the employment forum. you seem to be unusually sensitive to noise. What bothers you probably wouldn't bother most people.
 
Old 01-31-2019, 09:13 AM
 
3,914 posts, read 2,748,478 times
Reputation: 7201
Quote:
Originally Posted by sedonaverde View Post
That's what I don't get. She keeps putting herself in compromising situations and it's as if she likes the attention. Let's face it. She should be paying me for all the services I provide her. But she doesn't do it with money because she's so stingy, so instead she does it with her body. There's no way you can convince me that she doesn't know what she's doing when she wears that clothing.
I think she would be terrified if she knew what what you were posting here and how you fantasized about her.

I think I've read all your threads over the years, about problems with your parents updating family on what you're doing, getting out of their house, job problems, being oversensitive to noises, etc. However, this thread is the first one where I remember you saying you were attracted to women. And this is a very unhealthy attraction that is scary because you think she is tempting you on purpose.

What if you found out she was talking to a boyfriend every night? I worry that when your fantasy finally bursts, you will move forward and "get even" with her.

Please move out, find another short term air bnb nearby. Get all your things out of her house. Focus on finding a new job. And get professional help.
 
Old 01-31-2019, 02:59 PM
 
Location: Scrapple country
1,548 posts, read 1,280,191 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by sedonaverde View Post
It doesn't look like the trust test will be happening anytime soon.
What is meant by "the trust test"? Does this involve entering her room?

(I don't think OP will answer. He/she probably put me on "ignore" already. Maybe someone else could ask?)
 
Old 01-31-2019, 05:03 PM
 
Location: Midwest
4,259 posts, read 7,147,636 times
Reputation: 7171
Quote:
Originally Posted by sedonaverde View Post
Thank you for the kind words, JanND. I plan on taking your advice to heart and moving out asap. Things changed for the worse today and I am going to contact other airbnb hosts and landlords who offer month to month leases without further delay.



I returned from work this evening to have my roommate invite me to talk face to face. She said she had something "difficult" to ask me. I thought uh oh...now what? Turns out that the comfy mattress I've been sleeping on the past year was given to her by a distant cousin, he's back in town and wants it back, even though I paid for a room with that bed and mattress. She wanted me to eat dinner and once done, remove the mattress from the bed frame and replace it with a harder cheaper one she had in her master bedroom that she doesn't sleep in. I tried to resist saying I was tired but eventually caved. She bossed me around, was wearing a jacket inside the house ..told me she was cold..OK. Then I offered to turn up the heat and did, and within 5 minutes of exercising, lifting, bending, she got warm enough to declare she'd change her clothes.

Guess what happened next? She went to her room and came back without the jacket, just a colorful blouse that was a bit loose at the neckline. And yup, you guessed it, she was wearing a bra that pushed her cleavage forward and I got occasional views The problem it was a second here and there...but combined with the face to face interaction and hearing her voice was enough to entice me.


But the problem is that now my back hurts, I have busy work shifts coming up...having trouble relaxing on this hard mattress and need to move out asap! I might even book (rent) another airbnb as soon as this weekend. Actually moving out will be risky because I could end up with even more inconsiderate night owl noisy roommates, but only 1 way to find out. Oh and I looked at 1 bedroom and studio apartments and they're all 1 year leases and above my budget. Room hunting here I come.
You need help.

Dragging this thread out forever is one indicator that you enjoy life under the microscope.
 
Old 01-31-2019, 08:39 PM
 
359 posts, read 188,372 times
Reputation: 298
Quote:
Originally Posted by Rowan123 View Post
I agree she sounds like she's very uncomfortable with the situation.

I disagree. If she was uncomfortable with close contact with me, she wouldn't keep asking me to participate in interactive activities that put us together in a room where she positions her body in compromising positions such that I can enjoy her with my eyes, touch her hands by accident, bump into each other, again by accident, etc. She has the choice to wear more modest clothing and separate herself from contact, she could even ask me to move out but she hasn't. Therefore she still has some comfort around me.


Quote:
Originally Posted by Rowan123 View Post
With almost any top that has a scoop neck or is open at the neck you can get a look at someone's cleavage if you're at the right angle.

Indeed
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