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Did I invite myself to be used again tonight? Here's what happened: I was going to go grocery shopping, my roommate was in her room and just walked into the common area when I mentioned I wanted to go shopping - did she need anything? She thought about it and then said OK , give her 10 minutes. So she got changed behind her closed door (fair enough), I waited and off we went in my car. We get to the parking lot and she asks to be dropped off at the front door. OK I comply. I park the car, enter the store and she's nowhere to be seen. I go about my business, check out, make a pit stop to go pee, load the groceries in my car - and she's still nowhere to be found. So I text her that I'm outside waiting for her - where is she?
No reply so I call her 6 mins later. She tells me she's in the clothing section so I tell her OK I need to get some groceries elsewhere as they were sold out at store #1. I drive 24 minutes to/from store #2 and get what I need, then return to store #1 where she still isn't outside. No text no call letting me know where she is. I called her again and she's at the cash...OK fine. Like a pushover, I drive my car to the front of the store, pick her up and take her her home.
I hadn't eaten dinner yet at that point and go to heat up a plate of chicken and veggies - already she's complaining how late it is (9:30 pm) - are you eating dinner now? Why so late? Ummmm because that's my choice and I just spent over an hour driving around for her until the stores closed at 9pm? Remember this is a woman who regularly makes noise until 1-1:30am even on weekdays. Seems like a narcissist to me.
Anyway going back to the trust test, I think I'll need some ideas on what to plan and how to execute it. One fact she seems obsessed about is discovering my age. Initially she requested a copy of my ID but I refused pointing to the fact I already sent ID to airbnb so it's unnecessary for the host to have it. Since then she's been trying to guess and often asks me to confirm it in various ways, and it's annoying. She needs to myob. So I'm thinking of making a plan whereby I offer to tell her my age, on the condition that she does something for me in exchange. And one of those things could be to show me herself wearing her pajamas, because she can trust me 90% right?
Otherwise if that's too far, I can settle for brushing her hair into a ponytail, helping her wash her feet (that's her nightly routine) and my ultimate goal is to help her change her day to night clothes...but I doubt she'd let me after she freaked out and slammed her door at the very sound of me climbing the stairs today.
I'm open to other ideas.
I'd advise everyone to put this moron on block as I am doing.
Did I invite myself to be used again tonight? Here's what happened: I was going to go grocery shopping, my roommate was in her room and just walked into the common area when I mentioned I wanted to go shopping - did she need anything? She thought about it and then said OK , give her 10 minutes. So she got changed behind her closed door (fair enough), I waited and off we went in my car. We get to the parking lot and she asks to be dropped off at the front door. OK I comply. I park the car, enter the store and she's nowhere to be seen. I go about my business, check out, make a pit stop to go pee, load the groceries in my car - and she's still nowhere to be found. So I text her that I'm outside waiting for her - where is she?
No reply so I call her 6 mins later. She tells me she's in the clothing section so I tell her OK I need to get some groceries elsewhere as they were sold out at store #1. I drive 24 minutes to/from store #2 and get what I need, then return to store #1 where she still isn't outside. No text no call letting me know where she is. I called her again and she's at the cash...OK fine. Like a pushover, I drive my car to the front of the store, pick her up and take her her home.
I hadn't eaten dinner yet at that point and go to heat up a plate of chicken and veggies - already she's complaining how late it is (9:30 pm) - are you eating dinner now? Why so late? Ummmm because that's my choice and I just spent over an hour driving around for her until the stores closed at 9pm? Remember this is a woman who regularly makes noise until 1-1:30am even on weekdays. Seems like a narcissist to me.
Anyway going back to the trust test, I think I'll need some ideas on what to plan and how to execute it. One fact she seems obsessed about is discovering my age. Initially she requested a copy of my ID but I refused pointing to the fact I already sent ID to airbnb so it's unnecessary for the host to have it. Since then she's been trying to guess and often asks me to confirm it in various ways, and it's annoying. She needs to myob. So I'm thinking of making a plan whereby I offer to tell her my age, on the condition that she does something for me in exchange. And one of those things could be to show me herself wearing her pajamas, because she can trust me 90% right?
Otherwise if that's too far, I can settle for brushing her hair into a ponytail, helping her wash her feet (that's her nightly routine) and my ultimate goal is to help her change her day to night clothes...but I doubt she'd let me after she freaked out and slammed her door at the very sound of me climbing the stairs today.
I'm open to other ideas.
If you were open to other ideas, your bags would have been packed, and you'd be signing a new lease with someone who doesn't blur the lines of landlord and friend. On the bright side, you are out of your parent's house, and you've held down a job for a year.
Don't feel sorry for her because she was an abuse victim. She wouldn't be the first woman to pull the "battered woman" card to get something she wants.
OP - I have read your posts in this thread. I think you should NOT be living with ANY room mate, neither man nor woman, until you have learned how to be socially mature and appropriate and have learned how to be a better judge of other people, because right now you suck at it and are all screwed up. You need to grow up and stop fantasizing about stupid, juvenile trust tests and stop fantasizing about your relationship with your equally screwed up landlady. Get out of where you are now and do it as soon as possible before you get labeled as a creep or worse and get yourself into trouble with the police and on some kind of watch list. You should be living alone independently and without interference from other people in a small affordable place of your own where you can live as you please. And you should be getting professional psychological and social counseling about what is and is not appropriate interaction and socialization with other people.
Why not? I told my ex gf that I wanted to brush her hair and lather her in a soapy bubble bath. Hearing this roommate's voice reminds me of the good times with my ex and I'd like to turn the fantasy into reality. Who better to try it out it out with than the woman who's taken advantage of me all these months and who is the most accessible guinea pig for this test.
Uhmm... Just w.o.w....
You can stop with this whole business about being "taken advantage of" and debating whether she's a narcissist. None of it matters. This is way above our pay grade. Please seek help.
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