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Old 02-09-2019, 10:37 AM
 
682 posts, read 182,376 times
Reputation: 1627

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“Bromance”?
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Old 02-09-2019, 11:51 AM
 
1,017 posts, read 1,154,552 times
Reputation: 667
Quote:
Originally Posted by Maddie104 View Post
This is the second time Bob has bailed on changing jobs and in fact has continued to work for Company A. It's been my experience that some people like the idea of changing jobs but cannot pull the trigger on making the change. It's a psychological issue related to security of the known vs. the unknown, that is difficult (or embarrassing) for them to explain.
True. However, company B (which I'm familiar with too), wasn't a super dominant awesome company to work for either. Hence why I said if Bob didn't join, I wouldn't even consider company B
Quote:
Originally Posted by ocnjgirl View Post
I think it's very bizarre for two adults to make vows to take a job only if the other one does. It sounds like something my bff and I would have done as teenagers. Maybe as Bob went through the interview process, he didn't get a good feeling and as he learned more about the job, didn't feel it was a good fit anymore. He was probably avoiding telling you. I think your expectation that an adult take a job he discovers isn't in his best interests for any reason, take it anyway because he promised you he would is, again, IMO, absurd.
Don't know about you, but in my market/area, one of the top reasons pple change jobs is due to personal referrals & relationships.
Quote:
Originally Posted by WorldKlas View Post
The point of this story is radio-silence is a loud and clear signal that he is not going to go with Company C.
I guess the real question is - should I reach out again? 1 call, 1 text, silence. He's never ghosted me like this before
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Old 02-09-2019, 12:07 PM
 
20,617 posts, read 16,659,647 times
Reputation: 38751
Quote:
Originally Posted by unknown00 View Post
True. However, company B (which I'm familiar with too), wasn't a super dominant awesome company to work for either. Hence why I said if Bob didn't join, I wouldn't even consider company B

Don't know about you, but in my market/area, one of the top reasons pple change jobs is due to personal referrals & relationships.

I guess the real question is - should I reach out again? 1 call, 1 text, silence. He's never ghosted me like this before
That's not the same as needing to make job decisions like you're a couple.
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Old 02-09-2019, 12:08 PM
 
Location: Northern panhandle WV
3,007 posts, read 2,175,019 times
Reputation: 6696
No you should not reach out again. You should close the book on this and move on deal with your own career and let him deal with his.
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Old 02-09-2019, 01:35 PM
 
Location: Europe, in the Land of the mean
950 posts, read 1,541,952 times
Reputation: 651
Quote:
Originally Posted by unknown00 View Post
True. However, company B (which I'm familiar with too), wasn't a super dominant awesome company to work for either. Hence why I said if Bob didn't join, I wouldn't even consider company B

Don't know about you, but in my market/area, one of the top reasons pple change jobs is due to personal referrals & relationships.

I guess the real question is - should I reach out again? 1 call, 1 text, silence. He's never ghosted me like this before
I would not. He isn't being very nice no matter how u split it. I don't like d sound of this guy.
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Old 02-09-2019, 02:23 PM
 
Location: on the wind
7,178 posts, read 2,948,182 times
Reputation: 24276
Quote:
Originally Posted by unknown00 View Post

I guess the real question is - should I reach out again? 1 call, 1 text, silence. He's never ghosted me like this before
No. It might give the impression of pot-stirring. I'd leave the next move up to him. Once he works out his answer he'll probably re-connect. If you pester him it may make things worse and you may push him farther away.
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Old 02-09-2019, 03:02 PM
 
Location: Dallas, TX and Las Vegas, NV
5,700 posts, read 4,429,448 times
Reputation: 11695
Something has happened, I suspect, that has changed his mind or has him on the fence.......things are really going well at Company A; his spouse is not supportive of this change; he’s decided he doesn’t like something important about Company C; he’s heard some rumors related to either/both companies that have him hesistant; 200 other possible personal or professional reasons. You can try reaching out or not out of curiousity, it doesn’t really matter. He’s not taking the new job.
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Old 02-09-2019, 03:16 PM
 
5,469 posts, read 2,929,616 times
Reputation: 24568
Quote:
Originally Posted by arwenmark View Post
No you should not reach out again. You should close the book on this and move on deal with your own career and let him deal with his.
^ Agree.

Quote:
Originally Posted by unknown00 View Post

That just doesn't seem like him. We are an open book, and we tell it as is
Sounds like you two are not on the same book.
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Old 02-09-2019, 04:38 PM
 
Location: Dallas TX
15,031 posts, read 21,758,845 times
Reputation: 22250
Just not understanding why you would ever make a career decision dependent on what a friend would do. Makong a career decision should all be on you. You never know what the future will bring, own your own destiny!
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Old 02-09-2019, 05:25 PM
 
1,017 posts, read 1,154,552 times
Reputation: 667
Quote:
Originally Posted by WorldKlas View Post
Something has happened, I suspect, that has changed his mind or has him on the fence.......things are really going well at Company A; his spouse is not supportive of this change; he’s decided he doesn’t like something important about Company C; he’s heard some rumors related to either/both companies that have him hesistant; 200 other possible personal or professional reasons. You can try reaching out or not out of curiousity, it doesn’t really matter. He’s not taking the new job.
+1 sounds like the only logical explanation
Quote:
Originally Posted by veuvegirl View Post
Just not understanding why you would ever make a career decision dependent on what a friend would do. Makong a career decision should all be on you. You never know what the future will bring, own your own destiny!
As I mentioned previously, in my market/area, one of the top reasons pple change jobs is due to personal referrals & relationships. I'm in the latter part of my career and people around me make me just as successful as myself
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