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Why should the OP not go & miss out on the festivities?! He has every right to go as well as everyone else, EXCEPT FOR the dog owners who'are disrespecting EVERYONE there.
The host having the party is the one who needs to step up, stop walking on eggshells, & stop being weak & straught out tell the dog owner & tell them they can ONLY COME IF THEY DON'T BRING THEIR DOG...simple as that, end of story. I don't care if they raise a fuss & get mad. That's what they get for not respecting & being thoughtful of others. It's the homeowner's house!
I love dogs too, but no one wants:
- fur on everything
- slobber & sniffing all over the place
- chance of the dog eating off people's plates like you said
- the dog owners obviously don't care who's allergic
- the dog owners obviously don't care who's got a fear of dogs
- the dog owners obviously don't care that parents probably don't trust a strange dog around their babies/kids
- the dog owners obviously don't care that ever the guest of honor doesn't know the dog & probably doesn't want that
Bringing a huge dog like that affects more people negatively than positively, so the dog owners are definitely entitled narcissists because they're only thinking of themselves & not another soul at the party.
He also has every right and every reason to avoid a get-together that will be ruined by the presence of this dog and its obnoxious owners. Only if he and others take a non-negotiable stance against the attendance of this or any dogs will this get-together be the enjoyable experience it should be.
Timidity is what entitles these narcissists. If the host and others won't put their feet down and firmly say NO!, there are plenty of other ways to enjoy an afternoon.
He also has every right and every reason to avoid a get-together that will be ruined by the presence of this dog and its obnoxious owners. Only if he and others take a non-negotiable stance against the attendance of this or any dogs will this get-together be the enjoyable experience it should be.
Timidity is what entitles these narcissists. If the host and others won't put their feet down and firmly say NO!, there are plenty of other ways to enjoy an afternoon.
I agree, especially w/ the sentence I bolded. The entitled a-hole dog owners are the ONLY ones here who should get grief & BE UNINVITED...no one else because they're the obstinant ones, refusing to be cooperative & apparently don't care of the feelings of 25+ people. Everyone else should be able to enjoy a good time.
Last edited by Forever Blue; 05-12-2019 at 11:32 AM..
If the hosts don't have a problem with it, there's not much you can do. The only option you have is to not attend.
love dogs so I would not have a problem with it, as long as it is well behaved. If you are not hosting, or have allergies, then you don't have much choice, except not going
I agree with your entire post EXCEPT that public parks often have policies either prohibiting dogs or limiting what they are allowed to do, and rightfully so. I wish more of them outright banned dogs, because too often the child-surrogate dog worshippers have no control over their pets and no concern whatsoever about their bad effects on other people and other animals (wild or domestic). I generally like well-behaved dogs, but I have lost tolerance for badly-behaved ones and their owners. If their loose dog gets shot by someone when it threatens them, OH WELL!
The OP really only has two choices: Do not attend, or attend but warn her guest of honor in advance that a big slobbery dog with selfish owners will be there. If the guest of honor says he or she won’t attend with the dog there, the hosts can take it as they please. They may allow the dog to displace the guest of honor, which should tell them something indeed.
I wish all of them banned all dogs, as they and their owners ruin environments there and wherever else they go. As for "well-behaved" dogs, I think I've seen 2 or 3 in my life....and I'm 69. Well-behaved is not the nature of the beast.
I know, that's the sad thing about this situation. If the homeowner doesn't mind, everyone suffers. I'm saying that it's the host's job solely to take the initiation & tell the dog owners to not bring it. Unfortunately, no one can really tell the host what to do because its THEIR house, unless everyone rebels & NO ONE comes if the dog comes. That would be a strong message.
Now, if the homeowner has siblings & parents who can ALL tell him to tell these dog owners, then maybe he'll listen.
The homeowner is being extremely thoughtless & uncaring as equally as the dog owners. Apparently, he'd rather have 1 huge dog come than care about the feelings of 20-25+ human being loved ones...that's sad & maddening!
I wish everyone can rebel & not come then.
You are making an assumption that everyone else doesn't want the dog there. Maybe all except the OP are dog lovers and enjoy having one there. Not everyone would suffer and maybe nobody would suffer (except the OP). You appear to be projecting your feelings on every single other person who is attending, which is rather odd to me. There was nothing stated in the OP about anyone except the OP objecting to the dog being there. Even the OP said that the dog had never touched the food, even though it's right where he could get it if he wanted to.
There's been no mention of allergies or anyone being afraid of a dog, all of those things are assumptions people are making, not based on fact.
The OP said the host is an indoor person, so the party would be indoors. We have no idea how big the house is, a 5000 square foot house would be more than adequate for that many people and one big St. Bernard. Even a 2000 square foot house, with the right layout, would be plenty big.
I love dogs and have a dog. I wouldn't even think about bringing my dog to a family special event. IF I had to because I couldn't find someone to check on her at home, I would at least put her in another room with her toys and bed etc. Not everyone likes dogs and I don't think anyone would want a huge dog hovering around the food table.
Plus a Saint Bernard is a HUGE dog. Doesn't sound like you have a choice though. Either go and deal with it, or stay home. You could have the lady you're bringing ask the host to tell them to leave the dog at home because (insert excuse).
Has any other family member expressed negative feelings about the dog?
- fur on everything
- slobber & sniffing all over the place
- chance of the dog eating off people's plates like you said
- the dog owners obviously don't care who's allergic
- the dog owners obviously don't care who's got a fear of dogs
- the dog owners obviously don't care that parents probably don't trust a strange dog around their babies/kids
- the dog owners obviously don't care that ever the guest of honor doesn't know the dog & probably doesn't want that
- the dog owners obviously don't care if the dog actually bites someone being in a house FULL of people because dogs get anxious & uneasy too
Bringing a huge dog like that affects more people negatively than positively, so the dog owners are definitely entitled narcissists because they're only thinking of themselves & not another soul at the party.
Quote:
Originally Posted by goldenlove
You are making an assumption that everyone else doesn't want the dog there...
You don't know that they ALL will like it either. None of us know unless we asked each guest, but no one's probably going to do that...the host should if he cares though. The smartest thing to do is on the invitation OR when he's calling everyone to invite them, he should mention that a big St. Bernard will be there & if they have a problem w/ that to voice their concern & see what solution can be done.
My list above are all the possible negatives about it (that could end pretty disastrously), so unless dog owners know for sure, they should think smart & not take a chance & not just bring dogs because they think "everyone loves dogs".
Last edited by Forever Blue; 05-12-2019 at 12:06 PM..
I CANNOT miss this event as I'm personally escorting the guest of honor over there.
I don’t agree with the dog coming unless the hosts specifically were asked and said yes. At that point, others can attend or not as they see fit. I’d never bring my dog to any gathering. Not everyone likes dogs and it’s rude to bring any pet (or an uninvited guest for that matter) to a home where you’re a guest.
I’ve declined more than one invitation due to the hosts having cats in the house. I’m highly allergic and it’s just not worth the misery cats cause me.
But, bottom line: Not your house, not your choice whether the dog attends or not.
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The entitled a-hole dog owners are the ONLY ones here who should get grief & BE UNINVITED...no one else because they're the obstinant ones, refusing to be cooperative & apparently don't care of the feelings of 25+ people. Everyone else should be able to enjoy a good time.
I'm saying that it's the host's job solely to take the initiation & tell the dog owners to not bring it. Unfortunately, no one can really tell the host what to do because its THEIR house, unless everyone rebels & NO ONE comes if the dog comes. That would be a strong message.
