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Old 05-13-2008, 10:35 AM
 
Location: Sacramento, CA
788 posts, read 3,765,953 times
Reputation: 708

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Fire her as your nanny (what she is doing to you is also toxic for your children--it teaches them that disrespecting you is okay, and it perpetuates an unhealthy fascination with looks and weight). Next, tell her if she can't speak to you with respect and compassion, and do the same in front of your children, then she can't speak to you and them at all. Period.

I am very sorry you are going through this.
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Old 05-13-2008, 11:04 AM
 
Location: Scranton
2,937 posts, read 3,048,611 times
Reputation: 570
I'm not saying this is the case for everyone, but on the whole, skinny people seem to be more miserable than people with average or bigger bodies....
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Old 05-13-2008, 11:30 AM
 
Location: Atlanta
218 posts, read 553,282 times
Reputation: 127
5' 10" and 160 is heavy? Are you joking? You already said the important things - you are happy and I say good for you! I bet you look great, not only your weight, but probably most of all because you love your life. Chew on that and give your mother a carrot.
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Old 05-13-2008, 11:37 AM
 
Location: Charlotte. Or Detroit.
1,455 posts, read 3,645,900 times
Reputation: 3264
I advise cutting her out of your life completely. Or just cutting her.
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Old 05-13-2008, 11:44 AM
 
Location: Atlanta
218 posts, read 553,282 times
Reputation: 127
I can't stand it. I have to add a quick note -- you may not be "happy" but if I was constantly nagged by my mother, I don't know what I would do. If you are in the position to hire another nanny, as a previous poster suggested, do it. And, so what if you think you need to lose a few pounds (I can't imagine you would need to take off anymore). BTW, if you decide to have a breast reduction - send me the leftovers. Smile. You've got a network of supportive women here.
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Old 05-13-2008, 11:48 AM
 
Location: Where the sun always shines..
1,939 posts, read 5,593,223 times
Reputation: 794
My mother does alot for us around the house, and she lives to take care of our 2yo. Not only would it hurt my daughter (they are really close) but it would hurt my mom too if I cut her out of my life. I know, she's not worried about my feelings, but she's still my mother and I could never do that. Not to mention that we cant afford childcare..

I'll just have to avoid her, too bad it takes her an hour to leave my house after I get home from work (thats annoying too)
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Old 05-13-2008, 12:30 PM
 
Location: Land of Thought and Flow
8,323 posts, read 13,478,374 times
Reputation: 4884
We all understand that you don't want to hurt your mom's feelings, but you really need to try and find an alternative to her. With the way she treats you and what she says to you, just imagine what she's telling your child when she wants cookies for a snack! People like her are like diseases, their illness spreads to those with the weakest immune systems - children.

At the current rate, your daughter is not going to respect you because of her.

If you can't afford professional mediation/help, I would advise you to create a list of all the things your mother does that offends and annoys you. One day when you both have time, sit her down (no children or other present) and go through the list with her.

Explain to her what the consequences of continuing those actions will be.

And if it doesn't stop, check out your local Head Start facility. They have programs available that can reduce the amount of childcare immensely.
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Old 05-13-2008, 12:38 PM
 
Location: Tennessee
16,227 posts, read 22,558,026 times
Reputation: 24023
Tell her that your husband loves your figure. You don`t have to impress your Mother or your sisters. If it bothers you personally, then do something about it..otherwise, happy eating!!
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Old 05-13-2008, 12:57 PM
 
Location: Kansas
3,855 posts, read 11,751,370 times
Reputation: 1714
If you are happy with the way you are then that is all that matters.

I'm bone skinny and always have been. (not rubbing it in or anything like that) According to my wife and several others (even some severely overweight in-laws) I'm unattractively skinny. I really do not give a damn what they think of me. I'm in better shape than they will ever be. I do not wish that I had a Mr. Universe body....not for one second.

I make my wife mad every now and then when I throw on some of her jeans to take out the trash early in the mornings (or other stuff like that). I don't do it to make her mad...i just do it because I'm in a hurry and my jeans were dirty.
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Old 05-13-2008, 01:08 PM
 
582 posts, read 1,825,759 times
Reputation: 262
just be straight and tell her how you feel and get this under control before you get emotionally sick.Here's how you do it.take her out to dinner one night and discuss how you feel about this and if that don't work i would create some distance from her and she will know why.
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