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Old 01-01-2009, 12:02 PM
5,273 posts, read 6,555,811 times
Reputation: 14922


Wow. I feel embarrassed as I think I have an Aunt that is Archie Bunker's clone!~ She constantly ridicules and is one bitter person! I dread going over for the holidays......I think it is out of pure guilt as my mother had passed away and feels like she has to most likely..

In a nutshell... I used to be very close to her. I remarried and am tremendously happy! Second time around for me is great. Anyway, my Aunt is a "Catholic" and abides by everything in the book.... I divorced and got remarried to my soul mate. I remember telling her he is really a great guy and want you to meet him. Her reply was "Oh, you thought so and so was great too!" Needless to say, I was a bit taken back. I was dumbfounded and thought, wow, thank you sir, I'd like another! NOT!!
She has been nasty and one up on me on everything from my twins (her daughter had a child 1 day before mine were born)...If I even mention them, she cuts me off and goes off about her daughter's kid...I can never get a word in about my kids so I don't even talk about them to her...When I had my twins she sent a picture of some couple who had sextuplets in her area... Ok, and your point? LOL.. then mentions how someone she knows has triplets.. THat is great...but ever since I had my own kids she will ignore anything I mention about them!My kids were born a bit early and her grandkid was born 2 weeks early and said he was a preemie (mind you, he was 10 lbs. at birth) My kids were 3.5 and 4 lbs. each ! (healthy as horses I might add)..

I made cupcakes with "blue snowflakes" on them (the little candy decorations) and she comes into the livingroom and announces "Are these for Hannukah?" very snidely. My answer should have been "yes, we recently converted to Judaism)...I am Roman Catholic, btw. and so is she. I have nothing against anyone's religion as I have friends of the Jewish faith also...She said, well,they are blue, aren't they? I looked at her and gave her a blank stare.... Any chance she gets she will start flying with insults. Her daughter is married to a lazy jerk *but she knew that from the start seeing she married the patient! (She is an RN).. He quits most of his jobs after a couple years...and she always wanted to stay at home. Her last kid was an "oops"!at 44 she had him.... I am SAHM with my twins right now and will not leave them before and after school for 12 hrs. a day....when my hub works LONG hours in his profession and we agreed it is better for them to have someone at home *for a couple years* while they are still little. They turn 4 in a few weeks. It seems to kill my Aunt that I stay at home with them while her daughter works for a living.. Up until the past year I worked full time all of my life! and part time once the twins came....To me, it is between my husband and I how we raise or kids or deal with things! I couldn't imagine if I had converted to another religion..She might fall over and go into cardiac arrest lol...My husband is Protestant too...so I am sure that's one against me for not marrying a Catholic... Oh, my first marriage I married someone in my own faith,never lived with him before I got married,went to the same church and got divorced..My choice, btw...

Any chance she gets she starts hurling insults... My husband said let's go somewhere else next year! I agree! I hate confrontation and know it makes her feel better when she puts someone else down.

I am really ready to go off on her one day lol but will be the bigger one and shrug it off...

What would you do?
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Old 01-01-2009, 12:10 PM
Location: Whiteville Tennessee
8,262 posts, read 16,376,540 times
Reputation: 10042
There is an aunt like this in every family I think. Including mine. I think these aunts try to accentuate the shortcomings [as they percieve them] of others to hide the shame of thier own or thier childrens shortcomings. But I think your hubby has the right idea. Go someplace next year where there wont be tension. Next time you may end up saying something to Auntie that although true, you will regret. Good luck. Of coarse you could just tell her to F**k off!
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Old 01-01-2009, 12:11 PM
Location: mass
2,905 posts, read 6,577,663 times
Reputation: 4979
Find something else to do on Christmas, that's what I'd do.

You don't need to hear that....
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Old 01-01-2009, 12:16 PM
5,007 posts, read 7,871,254 times
Reputation: 5703
I had an ex-mother-in-law who was a staunch Catholic (was going to be a nun before she met my father-in-law and had seven sons) and at every family get-together she would mention Jewish people and say out loud unexpectedly,"I hate Jews!" in spite of the fact nobody was talking about anything remotely Jewish in the first place.

I got divorced from the ex-husband and later I found out the MIL died from bone cancer. I can't help think that it was a karma thing. She was this little petite lady with brown curly hair and flower print dresses and fancy hats on Easter, but don't get her started talking about Jewish people. Oh my, my.
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Old 01-01-2009, 12:21 PM
5,273 posts, read 6,555,811 times
Reputation: 14922
thanks guys!!

I think we will sit the next one out!! I do not need the unnecessary tension around this woman....

One of these days she will get punched lol while out in public with the nasty, bitter things she says about total strangers even in public!! I guess I need to consider the source.....and just smile at her knowing I am laughing AT HER , not with her !

I am very close to one of her sons and don't want to go off and risk losing him as a great friend and cousin! so I will zip my lip but just smile in the future lol.
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Old 01-01-2009, 12:30 PM
Location: Whiteville Tennessee
8,262 posts, read 16,376,540 times
Reputation: 10042
1961-Rural Tennessee- I'm on the front porch swing with my great aunt shelling peas. She was about 70 years old. She asked if I had listened to the news on the "talking box" today. I said "no maam. Why?" She said " I was wondering if they had caught Hitler yet." I didnt want to embarass her so I just said " I dont know." I think it was Alzheimers before they called it that. Gotta love em though!
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Old 01-01-2009, 01:17 PM
Location: Florida
7,269 posts, read 9,421,672 times
Reputation: 6015
I have an Aunt like that. Behind her back, her name is "Aunt Groan." Rhymes with her first name. Everyone just sucked it up around her and bites their tongue, smiles and nods. When she leaves, it's like being in a wind tunnel with the way everyone releases their breath. If the pesky one is much older, as Aunt Groan is, not much you can do to change their ways. It's an experience. I feel for ya.
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Old 01-01-2009, 01:20 PM
13,779 posts, read 23,744,570 times
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I would never go back there! How terrible...or, go prepared next year with some huge zingers to put Auntie in her place...
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Old 01-01-2009, 06:04 PM
Location: Coachella Valley, California
15,564 posts, read 36,569,083 times
Reputation: 13180
I wouldn't spend time with her, that's for sure. You've been her "whippin' boy (girl)" long enough. It's time to pass the torch to a different unsuspecting victim - I mean, family member.

I don't care for confrontation myself, but I would probably let this woman have it with both barrels!
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Old 01-01-2009, 09:57 PM
25,165 posts, read 48,435,427 times
Reputation: 6958
She sounds like the kindest most gentlest of creatures
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