Please register to participate in our discussions with 2 million other members - it's free and quick! Some forums can only be seen by registered members. After you create your account, you'll be able to customize options and access all our 15,000 new posts/day with fewer ads.
For most women who don't fall prey to the insecurities that feed the bitchy, backstabbing, "mean girl" culture, or who outgrew them as they grew up and grew stronger, they develop a very keen filter for finding other women who are like them in that regard, and avoid the petty crap by careful observation and selection of peers. Once you get really good at sussing out who the catty, insincere, vindictive ones are early on, you can avoid/limit contact acccordingly.
My experience has been that men are even more cruel to each other than women are. Men actually kill and really hurt each other while women don't do this.
Men rip at men, and women rip at women. The difference, in my opinion, is that women rip at each other in a more passive-aggressive manner, where as, men tend to be more "in your face" and upfront about it. Men tend to hide their vindictive, insecure manner, but it shows. You just have to know what you're looking for. What may come of as this "alpha male" mentality. could really be someone who feels like he has something to prove. And men will do bad things to each other. Men will kill one another. The difference between men and women is that men are much more likely to use brute force and homicide than women.
My experience has been that men are even more cruel to each other than women are. Men actually kill and really hurt each other while women don't do this.
Men will do that. I think what makes women seem really mean is the "backstabbing". Men can backstab too, and often do. Men will also kill. It's a matter of HOW meanness is used.
Men rip at men, and women rip at women. The difference, in my opinion, is that women rip at each other in a more passive-aggressive manner, where as, men tend to be more "in your face" and upfront about it. Men tend to hide their vindictive, insecure manner, but it shows. You just have to know what you're looking for. What may come of as this "alpha male" mentality. could really be someone who feels like he has something to prove. And men will do bad things to each other. Men will kill one another. The difference between men and women is that men are much more likely to use brute force and homicide than women.
While I agree with you, I think it is best to let that group of people fight it out.
It's so sad to see this stuff going on in middle and even elementary school! That's when the Queen Bee crap just flourishes because the girls are awkward about going through so many changes. Unfortunately, the girls who are the Queen Bees are often egged on by Queen Bee mums who think that's the way for their little darlings to become leaders and popular. VERY sad and I just don't know how society and educators can change those dynamics.
It can theoretically be fixed by promoting social equality among peers. Sure, some kids might come from more or less well-off financial backgrounds, and some kids might be better at math or sports while others are better at English or science...but when it all comes down to the basics, we are all pretty much equal in relative biological terms of being a species.
Explicitly promoting social equality could go a long way toward solving the problem, IMHO
From a male perspective, I seem to have noticed over the years that many, not all of course, girls/women are just not very nice to each other. Also I've heard females speak enviously about the easy rapport males have with each other. Why is this? Is it a competitive thing? Is it that men are more direct? Do most women grow out of it? We like to say that women are the gentler, nicer sex, but is it really true. Please help educate the father of a daughter.
A good book to read is "Odd Girl Out". It does give you an insight how women are like that from an early age. Generally, I do not think women grow out of it. We men have our own peculiar things and women do too.
I had three daughters. I was raised by a mother, aunts, and grandmother. My father died when I was 14. Later I married my wife and we had three daughters. Now, I also have my mother-in-law at home with us.
What I did when we were raising our daughters is read about women issues. My wife and daughters used to get a kick out of it because I used to read Cosmo, Madam..., etc. Once they asked me how come I read those types of women magazines. I told them I had a wife and three daughters and it was good for me to try to understand what women like to do, not understand them, just know what they like to do. Actually, it helped. To this day they tell me I know hot to deal with women and even manipulate them if I want to.
I have a cute story:
When I was stationed in Germany my oldest daughter, then about 17, and I went to a German Bazaar on base. She saw this nice framed painting she wanted. She asked the lady how much it cost. I forgot how much but it was more than my daughter wanted to pay. I asked my daughter how much she was willing to pay for the painting. Then I went back to the lady and I made a comment to the lady about her eyes. I could tell the lady simply melted. I asked her if I could have the frame for what my daughter told me she was willing to pay. My daughter's jaw dropped and her eyes went wide open. She then told me "you are bad!" I replied "I got you what I wanted, right?" She said "Yes". I said "Any complains?" She said "No".
My wife very often has me talk to women when she calls for things like bank accounts, or when we go to a store, or at a restaurant. He reasons? She tells me I know how to talk to women. Take care.
Please register to post and access all features of our very popular forum. It is free and quick. Over $68,000 in prizes has already been given out to active posters on our forum. Additional giveaways are planned.
Detailed information about all U.S. cities, counties, and zip codes on our site: City-data.com.
Please register to participate in our discussions with 2 million other members - it's free and quick! Some forums can only be seen by registered members. After you create your account, you'll be able to customize options and access all our 15,000 new posts/day with fewer ads.
VERY sad and I just don't know how society and educators can change those dynamics.
