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While some women are absolute sweethearts, there are some who are absolutely cold, calculating, and cruel.
Some of the women I know have even said they prefer being friends with men cause women can be in their words, "catty, jealous b words
yes, they are....
I had two very very close girlfriends who were just that, calculating...they are no longer friends...
however, I've also had the most rewarding relationships with some women, but they were extremely confident.
Years ago, after my divorce, I wanted to take short mini-vacations...so my cousin suggested a safe motel for me to go, by myself...I was new to getting out and about. So, I started going to this one motel every weekend, for 2 years. The owner, of the motel, would see me sitting outside, reading a book, or whatever, and she'd stop by for a chat. She became one of my very best friends....loved her dearly.
But, she didn't weigh her success by how much money they had or the clothes she wore, while they were quite well to do, she reminded me of a college professor, very interesting to talk to, she loved the arts, wrote, and did so many diverse careers in her life time. She was a people magnet, everyone loved her.
Awesome lady, and I've been fortunate to have known 3 of them in my lifetime like her.
As someone already touched base on, I really believe it has to do with a strong, confident mother in life, or strong confident role models who were woman.
Yeah l know at school , even primary school for my daughter , my God they were little tyrants .
l thought growing up as a guy was pretty tough but l do think the girls are worse now that l've lived through some of the stuff my daughter went through.
She's 16 now and goes to tech school which is about 2/3 male and l asked her if she's had any problems and minds that there aren't as many girls.
She said my God no way dad , guys are so much easier to get along with , it's actually a relief not to have to deal with so many girls.
l also have 6 sisters and 4 brothers.
On the brothers , l love them all and there's never really been any drama of any kind. We live all over the country now but whenever we see each other it's just simple and fun and happy to catch up.
There's never any hassle within the family from any of the boys either. Although there was when we were younger , some of us into a lotta shyt.
But the girls , it never ends. l don't even see any of them and hardly call any, every few years if l can get away with it, yet still they hassle us and cause shyt from a far. l'm 3hours away in another world yet the drama and bs l've had to deal with , all from the girls.
You know, I used to feel the same way when I was young, but over the years my perspective has evolved. Chalk it up to maturity (or wising up about men), but what I have learned is that what I used to perceive as "meanness" is often women unapologetically calling one another out on their shyt. It's easy to be around dudes, because they often treat the token female much more gently than they do one another, or the way another women would. Are some women more petty an abrasive than others? Absolutely. Same as how some men are more petty and abrasive. *******ry is not bound by gender.
You know, I used to feel the same way when I was young, but over the years my perspective has evolved. Chalk it up to maturity (or wising up about men), but what I have learned is that what I used to perceive as "meanness" is often women unapologetically calling one another out on their shyt. It's easy to be around dudes, because they often treat the token female much more gently than they do one another, or the way another women would. Are some women more petty an abrasive than others? Absolutely. Same as how some men are more petty and abrasive. *******ry is not bound by gender.
I tend to lean your way, however, in all the years I've been affiliated with men and actually worked with men, I only knew two who were worse than women, bought into gossip, had to brag, and rally for attention. All the rest were pretty awesome people...and you could tell if their wives would be confident well balanced and mature, by those same men, inviting my husband and myself to their home for dinner, and we all became friends.
There was one, who we later found out was a screamer, she was not well adjusted, and would scream at the top of her lungs at her husband and kids....
She also threw swear words around like they were jellybeans, so one day, I asked her to leave my home.
the husband stayed with her, sadly, he was a kind hearted soul....so we lost two friends, but there was no way someone was going to swear like that in front of my son.
Humans, in general, and left to their own devices and inclinations, can and will be ruthless. That's why rules for conduct and behavior in society are ever so important. That's why parents are so important. If parents don't teach children compassion, empathy, behaving with utmost propriety, then barbaric is what you'll get.
I think a lot of it is biology. Female animals frequently do not get along. A female establishes dominance to protect herself because she is vulnerable and afraid. In human terms, the more misogynistic the society, the worse the women are, because they believe that without male approval, they are nothing.
Well, in a pride of lions, it's usually all females and one male, excluding cubs. And if there are male cubs, they'll get driven out of the pride eventually. And a male lion will kill any other male cubs that aren't his, given the opportunity.
And with elephants, it's mostly all females, and they all pretty well get along, and help raise each other's calves.
Same thing with cows and sheep, and goats and chickens. Bunch of females, a couple of males.
And I feel like we live in a very misogynistic society...better than it used to be (here in the USA) but women fight against that every day. And now, more than ever, women are grouping together, and sticking up for each other by the thousands. Hundreds of thousands would probably be more accurate.
When you talk about being mean, let's remember that historically, it's been the men who blow each other's limbs off, pillage, and destroy other countries.
CAN women be mean? Oh yes. Of course. But one gender more so than the other? I don't buy that premise.
I had two very very close girlfriends who were just that, calculating...they are no longer friends...
however, I've also had the most rewarding relationships with some women, but they were extremely confident.
Years ago, after my divorce, I wanted to take short mini-vacations...so my cousin suggested a safe motel for me to go, by myself...I was new to getting out and about. So, I started going to this one motel every weekend, for 2 years. The owner, of the motel, would see me sitting outside, reading a book, or whatever, and she'd stop by for a chat. She became one of my very best friends....loved her dearly.
But, she didn't weigh her success by how much money they had or the clothes she wore, while they were quite well to do, she reminded me of a college professor, very interesting to talk to, she loved the arts, wrote, and did so many diverse careers in her life time. She was a people magnet, everyone loved her.
Awesome lady, and I've been fortunate to have known 3 of them in my lifetime like her.
As someone already touched base on, I really believe it has to do with a strong, confident mother in life, or strong confident role models who were woman.
Don't get me wrong I adore women but some are so mean. I mean I have met nice women but the ones who are cruel stick out like a sore thumb.
Don't get me wrong I adore women but some are so mean. I mean I have met nice women but the ones who are cruel stick out like a sore thumb.
totally understand, and yes, you are right, but for every mean person, there are more nice women, so....
I've met women in forums with whom I am still friends with, and others who I wouldn't give you a plug nickle for....forums are a discussion....everyone has a difference of opinion, that's all it is, no one is right, or wrong, it simply is how you feel about things, however, you have people who get really nasty both women and men...and it's very easy to cop an attitude...so I know what you mean.
Nice women are personable, they don't need to dress in label clothing to get attention...most women who spend lots of money on clothing (and of course I don't mean all women) and judge others by what they wear are woman who lack confidence...by purchasing very expensive clothes they feel good about themselves...and those are the mean ones...
If your older you can usually pick them out, right away....
Me, when I was young and out dancing with my girlfriends, I'd make myself unapproachable...by looking mean, hardly smiling....lol, it works....
totally understand, and yes, you are right, but for every mean person, there are more nice women, so....
I've met women in forums with whom I am still friends with, and others who I wouldn't give you a plug nickle for....forums are a discussion....everyone has a difference of opinion, that's all it is, no one is right, or wrong, it simply is how you feel about things, however, you have people who get really nasty both women and men...and it's very easy to cop an attitude...so I know what you mean.
Nice women are personable, they don't need to dress in label clothing to get attention...most women who spend lots of money on clothing (and of course I don't mean all women) and judge others by what they wear are woman who lack confidence...by purchasing very expensive clothes they feel good about themselves...and those are the mean ones...
If your older you can usually pick them out, right away....
Me, when I was young and out dancing with my girlfriends, I'd make myself unapproachable...by looking mean, hardly smiling....lol, it works....
I think I get along with a few women on this forum. The rest I've butted heads with a few times so I put them on ignore and don't respond to them. I hate to arguing and definitely won't argue with a woman I'm not sleeping with. Waste of time. Sure some men are mean, but I can have an argument with a man, trade insults, and then we're good and get some food.
This doesn't mean I am a woman hater. But I have butted heads with them a lot in my life.
Get three girls/women or more together and there will usually always be drama, just the way it is.
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