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Old 04-25-2009, 05:48 AM
miu
 
Location: MA/NH
17,152 posts, read 34,648,266 times
Reputation: 16255

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Just tell them that your septic system has been acting up and can't handle the extra activity (load ) from eight extra people in the house. lol!

I wonder if you told them that you were going to be on vacation yourself during that week, if they'd offer to house-sit for you and suggest you hide a key outside for them?
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Old 04-25-2009, 06:13 AM
 
7,982 posts, read 11,667,446 times
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I think we need more info.
How much email traffic have you been keeping up with these last 15 years? If its been pretty frequent and you still feel like friends and you don't think he's going to show up and hey big surprise he's joined the Aryan Nation. Has he talked about his wife and kids, what they are like? Do they sound nice?
It's very hard to be honest but if you still care about this friendship at all you should make the effort to be honest. I thought guys were better at this?
You know, hey I'd love to see you but I don' know your wife, you don't know mine, what if they hate each other, we aren't used to 6 kids, are you going to take them out a lot? I feel bad not giving an unqualified yes right off the bat but I'm trying to be open so lets discuss.....

Do you have a finished basement or separate from living rec room that you can sort of limit the kids to?
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Old 04-25-2009, 06:53 AM
miu
 
Location: MA/NH
17,152 posts, read 34,648,266 times
Reputation: 16255
Quote:
Originally Posted by Giesela View Post
I think we need more info.
How much email traffic have you been keeping up with these last 15 years? If its been pretty frequent and you still feel like friends and you don't think he's going to show up and hey big surprise he's joined the Aryan Nation. Has he talked about his wife and kids, what they are like? Do they sound nice?
It's very hard to be honest but if you still care about this friendship at all you should make the effort to be honest. I thought guys were better at this?
You know, hey I'd love to see you but I don' know your wife, you don't know mine, what if they hate each other, we aren't used to 6 kids, are you going to take them out a lot? I feel bad not giving an unqualified yes right off the bat but I'm trying to be open so lets discuss.....

Do you have a finished basement or separate from living rec room that you can sort of limit the kids to?
Good point. However I feel that some of us were just a bit put off (for her) by the fact that her friend made the request without apologizing for the large size of his family and not acknowledging that having a family of 8 people (twice the size of an average family unit) might be a huge inconvenience for her and her family to deal with. Even if she had a designated guest room, eight people using one or two bathrooms is a heavy traffic situation. Just by asking to sleep on their floor, made the request seem small and trivial like it was no big deal and should be granted. As in who says that they don't have enough floor space for eight people to sleep on! He also didn't say that he'd really appreciate huge favour of using their floor and that in the future, they could visit them in WA and sleep on their floor in return.

And any decent person isn't going to say yes, and then literally let them into their house and lead them to the floor area they all will sleep on. If there is a spared guest room, the adults will get offered a bed. If there isn't a guest room, the adults will get offered the couches to sleep on. And extra pillows, linens and towels will be scrounged up and offered to them. And what about meals? The O.P. won't be able to make a meal for her family without offering some to the visiting family. So ahead of time, extra groceries will have to be bought. So there is no way that asking to sleep on a friend's floor is not going to just that but become some sort of major effort on the part of their hostess and her family.

It's like having the Brady Bunch dropping in...
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