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It has nothing to do being social. I go to funerals out of respect and support for the ones that are grieving. I never "enjoy" them, and I can't imagine anyone saying that they do.
The only people I know who enjoy going to wakes are Irish.
Well, I recently went to my IRISH Uncle's funeral.... Initially, I went to support my Dad, because I can't remember much about that side of the family myself. They all lived fairly near each other, but I haven't seen any of them since I was little. Despite the efforts of some to get them together.
But I was glad I went because I met cousins and Uncles who were surprisingly happy to see me. I wasn't treated like a stranger to them, even though I'd felt like one for years.
And it turns out, I even have some family near where I live now.
I also remember my Grandfather's (on the other side) memorial services - one where he lived, one where he was buried (Arlington Nat'l Cem'y). He had been the reason we had family reunions - there haven't been any since he passed. In a way, it was the last reunion he was responsible for.
I don't like going to funerals as I'd much rather everyone lived forever and whilst I consider a funeral a sombre occasion and all about respect, I can say that I have been to many where laughter has been encouraged. I think that is also a fitting way to honour a person's life, if that was their wish.
I have been to heart breaking funerals and some more "joyous" funerals.
In all the funerals I've been to I simply take my cues from those around me and the immediate family, as well as my own personal grief gets taken into consideration depending on the circumstances and my relationship with the person who has died.
I was at a funeral on Monday for a close and very respected family friend and there was much laughing and joy that he had lived such an amazing life, had made such an impact on those around him and was no longer suffering. A life well lived. Certainly it was a very sad occasion at times and there was quiet reflection and sombre ceremony but there was also time to celebrate the wonderful person he was and that included laughter. I think the telling of stories and the sharing of laughter even in times of great sadness is simply a way for people to understand and work through their grief and loss together.
I hope there will be laughter and merriment at my funeral, I'd love for there to be dancing and singing too but I suspect people might not feel like it. I won't be there so it's their decision to make. It's not for me to tell others how to deal with their grief. There will also be CAKE! IMO pretty much every crappy thing in life can be fixed with a good bit of cake! I don't want to be remembered as having a funeral with crap cakes!
Funerals and wakes for me are usually very awkward and I hate that aspect. Mostly because I hardly know anyone there. But I always do my best to pay my respects to the deceased and their family. I don't think I've ever actually been to one of the afterwards get-togethers or whatnot where there was food, other than for my grandmother's funeral when I was really young. :/
Plus, most of the funerals I've been to were long and boring, as well as some of the wakes I've been to.
Location: Democratic Peoples Republic of Redneckistan
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I can't believe someone would go to a funeral as a "social occasion"...Jesus ,you are burying someone who lived ,laughed and loved and who is no more...that's a tragedy,not a party
I will go to a funeral as often as I am able to, but usually it is very close friends or family members. I don't like to think of it as a social event by any means as usually it is such a sad and depressing occasion. If it is family funeral, I think it is good to see distant family members time to time.
One can appreciate and enjoy being able to see family members and others whom one hasn't seen for a long time without "enjoying" the funeral/wake itself. The occasion itself is sad and serious, but the opportunity of a reunion with the living is a welcome one.
I hate them. I only attend immediate family and close friends, that's it. All else get sent a mass card and maybe flowers if they were that likeable. When I die, I want to be cremated and tossed into the ocean.
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