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I have two younger brothers, both boys, and I am a girl. Anyway, my mom's not home a lot as she has to go to work (and I'm old enough to stay home) but how do I get my younger brother (11) to stop being such a prick to my youngest brother and to me?! I ask him to help with the laundry and he freaks out and screams. He's always trying to boss me and my youngest brother around, and he always just stands there criticizing people as he watches TV. He decides what channels we watch and things like that, without even asking. And he's constantly complaining and wallowing in self-pity, going on about how "NOBODY LOVES HIM" and "EVERYONE HATES HIM BECAUSE OF HIS LAST NAME". *
Location: Everybody is going to hurt you, you just gotta find the ones worth suffering for-B Marley
9,516 posts, read 20,004,411 times
Reputation: 9418
Quote:
Originally Posted by YumiTheWriter
I have two younger brothers, both boys, and I am a girl. Anyway, my mom's not home a lot as she has to go to work (and I'm old enough to stay home) but how do I get my younger brother (11) to stop being such a prick to my youngest brother and to me?! I ask him to help with the laundry and he freaks out and screams. He's always trying to boss me and my youngest brother around, and he always just stands there criticizing people as he watches TV. He decides what channels we watch and things like that, without even asking. And he's constantly complaining and wallowing in self-pity, going on about how "NOBODY LOVES HIM" and "EVERYONE HATES HIM BECAUSE OF HIS LAST NAME". *
*Behind that...my mom was abused by his dad.
How unusual. LOL Sorry, just teasing ya. Couldn't resist. To answer your question, all you can do is put a lock on your bedroom door and look forward to the day you get to move. Or, take a deep breath and try to relax while you wait for him to grow up. Good luck.
I have two younger brothers, both boys, and I am a girl. Anyway, my mom's not home a lot as she has to go to work (and I'm old enough to stay home) but how do I get my younger brother (11) to stop being such a prick to my youngest brother and to me?! I ask him to help with the laundry and he freaks out and screams. He's always trying to boss me and my youngest brother around, and he always just stands there criticizing people as he watches TV. He decides what channels we watch and things like that, without even asking. And he's constantly complaining and wallowing in self-pity, going on about how "NOBODY LOVES HIM" and "EVERYONE HATES HIM BECAUSE OF HIS LAST NAME". *
*Behind that...my mom was abused by his dad.
Clearly parental supervision is required in this home. When your mother gets home share your concerns with her. Suggest she set some rules and appoint chores (post them on the fridge) to each of you. You sound very mature but you shouldn't be the responsible party here.
Also suggest a family sit down with your brothers and your mom (at least once a week) to discuss the things that bother you, and him too, 'last name', whatever. But also make it fun, talk about good things, how you did in school, sports, etc...
Remember, you guys are a team, once you and your brothers feel that you all have each others backs he may start feeling a lot better about himself.
Nothing is more infuriating to a brat than remaining calm. They behave the way they do to get attention, so if you ignore his yelling, but engage fully when he talks quietly, he'll learn that his yelling won't get results.
You also need your mom to come in and lay down the law. That is her job as a parent. The chore chart on the fridge is a good idea because she's made it, so she knows whats on it. Of course, this means you and the other brother have to do your chores without complaining as well.
As for the TV, take the amount of time you are home, divide it by three, and start a timer. Each person gets the remote for their portion. If he doesn't like it, he doesn't have to watch. He will probably yell and scream the first few times, but you must remain calm. He will eventually tire of causing problems once he sees that he's not getting his way.
You can't do any of the things I have mentioned in a mean way. If you do it to taunt him, you're just as bad as he is. It won't get fixed overnight, but he will eventually learn that you are serious about the new rules. Of course, your mom has to support you in all of this or it's lost on the brother.
How unusual. LOL Sorry, just teasing ya. Couldn't resist. To answer your question, all you can do is put a lock on your bedroom door and look forward to the day you get to move. Or, take a deep breath and try to relax while you wait for him to grow up. Good luck.
The OP's probably 15ish, and this is the piece of advice you have, O whyte one
My brother and I were enemies until the age of 15 or so. Today we're like blood and vein. It all falls into place with time.
My mother said I pushed a bench on him and it crushed his little finger on his left hand. And he showed it to me 2 days ago and we laughed.
Then I showed him my thigh scar where he shoved a pair of scissors during a chasing fight, and we laughed again.
All this in the household of the stricted Daddy and the most loveable mommy the world had ever seen.
Males can let this sorta kid stuff go when they reach maturity and laugh about it. I grew up with 2 sisters and a brother, females tend to be..... not quite as forgiving. Just my take on the sibling deal.
I have two younger brothers, both boys, and I am a girl. Anyway, my mom's not home a lot as she has to go to work (and I'm old enough to stay home) but how do I get my younger brother (11) to stop being such a prick to my youngest brother and to me?! I ask him to help with the laundry and he freaks out and screams. He's always trying to boss me and my youngest brother around, and he always just stands there criticizing people as he watches TV. He decides what channels we watch and things like that, without even asking. And he's constantly complaining and wallowing in self-pity, going on about how "NOBODY LOVES HIM" and "EVERYONE HATES HIM BECAUSE OF HIS LAST NAME". *
*Behind that...my mom was abused by his dad.
Maybe there is more going on emotionally with him, than meets the eye. What makes me think this, is the fact that you said he cuts himself down, and everyone around him down, even people on TV.
To me, that brings up a red flag! I know that 11 year olds can be annoying and all, but still....maybe you could try talking to your Mom about what he says, and the way he acts, when she is gone to work.
Or, maybe you could try a diffrent approach with him.
As the oldest sibling, you should take charge. It's the natural order of things. Arrange with your mom that you would manage things in the house when she is away from home, from food, to TV watching, to everything.
Is your youngest brother being bullied at school? What makes him act that way?
Show your Mom what you have written - and the replies. You alone can't do anything without her help. The chore list is a great idea - it isn't up to you to get your brother to help with chores - your Mom has to hold him accountable for HIS chores, ones that are specifically for him to do. Without knowing the ages of your younger brothers, it's difficult to give you too specific advice. But you do need to be working as a team - all 4 of you - Mom, you, and brothers.
If your Mom is not able to help you, to discuss it with you, to understand, then I suggest you discuss this issue with a counsellor at school.
Location: Everybody is going to hurt you, you just gotta find the ones worth suffering for-B Marley
9,516 posts, read 20,004,411 times
Reputation: 9418
Quote:
Originally Posted by Antlered Chamataka
The OP's probably 15ish, and this is the piece of advice you have, O whyte one
It was actually tongue-in-cheek. Sorry that went over your antlers.
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What makes me think this, is the fact that you said he cuts himself down, and everyone around him down, even people on TV.
