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Old 03-16-2010, 03:49 PM
Location: Griffin, Georgia
747 posts, read 1,747,437 times
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To those of you who are attatched...do you treasure your friendships with people of the opposite sex who don't interest you romantically? I think platonic friends are a great thing. They can give you support, emotional boost, whatever. I had a platonic friend who I'd know for 18 years that died last October of the swine flu. I still miss him. It is so sad, He was only 32. My fiance before we were real serious went to the funeral with me. I admit I shed a tear as his casket was carried by the pallbearers out of the church. My other friends who live in his apartment complex miss him too. My platonic friend, who will remain nameless, put me on a pedestal. I just hate that he had to die like that. It's ironic, that i met a guy at my support group not too long ago who has the same first name. Think he would be a good platonic friend, but who can replace the one you knew a long time and cared about? This is one reason I think people should cultivate friendships instead of cheating on their SOs. You may have a treasure in someone who is strictly a "buddy" or friend.
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Old 03-16-2010, 04:07 PM
Location: Nashville, Tn
7,916 posts, read 16,394,895 times
Reputation: 5442
Yes, it's important to have friends like that and I'm so sorry to hear about the death of someone you cared about. I think the natural and most fulfilling thing is to have alot of friends who are both male and female and someone who you love romantically. I think it would be awful not to have the support of friends who are there for you and supportive but it's not necessarily a romantic interest.
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Old 03-17-2010, 06:42 AM
4,379 posts, read 4,272,111 times
Reputation: 1612
Why not? All friendships should be treasured.
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Old 03-17-2010, 07:00 AM
Location: The Jar
20,071 posts, read 13,744,602 times
Reputation: 36712
It's very hard for a male to just be in a platonic friendship with an attractive female without wanting to hump her.

Heck, most males would hump an unattractive female if she gave him the green light.

If you find that kind of friendship, where nothing is desired in the sexual area, then you have found a rare gem indeed!
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Old 03-17-2010, 08:01 AM
Location: Hawaii
2,058 posts, read 2,805,404 times
Reputation: 1572
So sorry about your friend.

I know I've said this before on here but it is soo much easier for me to make friends and make stronger friendships with guys. My best friend is a guy and his girlfriend is just ok. I have really tried to think about why this is and I can't come up with anything. I just seem to automatically think guys are deeper and more interesting. I know that's not really true but I subconciously think it when I meet new people.
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Old 03-17-2010, 08:08 AM
Location: In the real world!
2,178 posts, read 8,219,530 times
Reputation: 2772
I have had many male friends that were friends only. I tried dating several of them but that just didn't feel right to me and I couldn't get past the "he is just a friend" thing to get romantic with them.
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Old 03-17-2010, 12:03 PM
2,179 posts, read 2,811,905 times
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Sorry about your friend...

I just think the only way for heterosexuals to have a platonic friendship with someone of the opposite sex is if neither is attracted to the other. If one isn't and the other one is it will get in the way. If both are, well then, you are in for a good ride...
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Old 03-17-2010, 12:09 PM
Location: Miami/ Washington DC
4,835 posts, read 9,771,429 times
Reputation: 2493
In high school i did not have many friends that were girls. I regret it too. But in college things changed, the dorm room next to me was four girls and I became friends with all of them Two of them are some of my best friends in school. I could never imagine being with them sexually and having friends that are girls really helps. Its nice to get a girls opinion on things.
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Old 03-17-2010, 01:45 PM
Location: Springfield MO
438 posts, read 1,162,530 times
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Having been married for 25 years, - divorced, and dating, and then with a SO, - in my life, I can say that throughout my life since the age of 15 I have many "platonic" friends.
Friends that are real, unconditional, and absolutely cherished for life as nothing more than that. They have always been there, many have married, had children, divorced and had children again, moved to different continents, Married, or remained single after their first marriage failed/ended in them being a widow etc.
Some have succumbed to awful terminal illnesses and I have been there for them and flown to their homes to accompany them/their families in times of distress.
They have been there since before my married life, during my married life, and following my married life. They are present in my current relationship with my SO and still a very significant part of everything I have respected in a friend, and given back to them.
There has never been a "hump syndrome" of any kind with them and I often joke with them about this when they are feeling melancholy that they lost their chance in my younger days...and continue to respect them as friends.....I have and they have never looked at out friendship that way.
None of them were ever FWB's, (I had those elsewhere in my single times) and no undercurrents of "wanting that much more" than being the friends that we are.
Both my ex wife and current SO have had to accept my friends as part of the bargain. That is the deal. MY SO has an excellent relationship with the majority of them.
My SO also has male friendships from prior to us getting together and I have no objection to them at all. Some have become firm friends as well.
I am Godparent to five of their children. What could be better?
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Old 12-08-2010, 10:19 AM
12,422 posts, read 14,547,993 times
Reputation: 14112
I have many platonic friends, I cherish them all..they are someone who I can talk to, and their opinions can mean a lot..
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