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I just went back and re-read the OP's question. I really think this thread has gotten off-track. The OP's original question had nothing to do with how to fit in while living in Hickory, nor did she suggest that she was looking for a city where only atheists reside, and where everyone bashes religion all the time. What the OP wanted to know was where she and her family could move that would still be close to her husband's work and that would offer her a community where being involved in organized religion wasn't a necessity to have an active social life. Given those parameters, it seems that the best way to answer the OP's question is to suggest communities that best fit what the OP is looking for.
Hey now, don't you go ruining our judgement-fest!!!
I just went back and re-read the OP's question. I really think this thread has gotten off-track. The OP's original question had nothing to do with how to fit in while living in Hickory, nor did she suggest that she was looking for a city where only atheists reside, and where everyone bashes religion all the time. What the OP wanted to know was where she and her family could move that would still be close to her husband's work and that would offer her a community where being involved in organized religion wasn't a necessity to have an active social life. Given those parameters, it seems that the best way to answer the OP's question is to suggest communities that best fit what the OP is looking for.
The original post was not the only post this lady made. She specifically asked where she would FIT IN - what neighborhoods - IN HICKORY, as I had mentioned her PRICE POINT was way too low to buy in the neighborhoods where I felt she WOULD be more comfortable. I went to a lot of trouble to lay all that out for her - including strategies for getting to know other folks.
But whatever. I am so done with this. I sincerely was offering what help I could to someone who is obviously unhappy about a big move she made.
There was no need whatsoever to jump on my case just b/c you are touchy about anyone who may suggest that a church or temple is a good place to get to know people.
At this point, I don't give a rat's ass where any of you live or how you feel about where you live, for that matter.
NC is no different than any other place, the people in the college towns are open minded and accepting so that's where others of like mind go. NC is changing to a swing state as far as politics go. I know that sounds stupid after that gay marriage ban, but regular Folks had no idea that would pass. Once again the people with a brain, get out voted by those that don't. Common sense does not seem to be a big attribute as of late.
I lived , with my atheist ways, very nicely in north Raleigh for about 7 years and loved it! Now I am in Hilton Head... the weathers nice.
Last edited by LPnerd; 06-15-2012 at 01:42 AM..
Reason: spelling
Here in Charlotte, many of the ladies I see going to church are dressed like straight up prostitutes. They all seem to be looking for a man who "believes in the lord". Whether one believes in God or not, most men can relate to an attractive woman who can afford to place $50 in a collection plate.
I came across this thread while looking for a church to join in Charlotte where there would be lots of social opportunities for a single guy like myself. So where are these wonderful churches filled with eligible single females that you speak of?
I came across this thread while looking for a church to join in Charlotte where there would be lots of social opportunities for a single guy like myself. So where are these wonderful churches filled with eligible single females that you speak of?
Just drive around tomorrow morning in just about any area of town; you'll see them.
I just went back and re-read the OP's question. I really think this thread has gotten off-track. The OP's original question had nothing to do with how to fit in while living in Hickory, nor did she suggest that she was looking for a city where only atheists reside, and where everyone bashes religion all the time. What the OP wanted to know was where she and her family could move that would still be close to her husband's work and that would offer her a community where being involved in organized religion wasn't a necessity to have an active social life. Given those parameters, it seems that the best way to answer the OP's question is to suggest communities that best fit what the OP is looking for.
THANK YOU for writing this! I have been reading through all this with my mouth gaping wide open. I cannot believe the track that this conversation has taken nor can I understand why I am being accused of things that I neither said nor insinuated. I have received more answers to questions I never actually asked, then the ones I did.
I'm really not getting a vibe from the OP that she wants to sit around and scoff at religious folks, nor did I read anywhere that she said she would refuse to associate with people who go to church. What she did say was she didn't want to go to church and she didn't want her kids to go to church which, of course, is her right just as it is the right of other folks to attend the church/synagogue/mosque/pagan temple of their choice. I don't think she has any problem with people going to church. What she has a problem with is finding a way to integrate herself and her kids into her community w/o going to church. And she would like to be in a less conservative area. Maybe the "fairy story" bit was a little heavy handed, but so is telling her to suck it up and go to church.
So 828Mom, if you're still out there. What do you want in a town besides less conservative and less religious-oriented?
I would just like to state that I never ever said I have a problem with anyone who wants to go to church nor did I say I wouldnt associate with anyone who follows religion. I think you are stating that very clearly for me, thank you.
I have been thinking about this question of what I want besides the two things stated above and I sincerely think my answer is pretty simple. All I want is a safe, clean place my kids can grow up in without feeling like social outcasts...and if its not too much to ask I'd like a Trader Joe's and a GAP (neither of which are available in Hickory). I think Charlotte suburbs are going to be the way to go. Thanks for all your help and advice.
I'm not even a liberal and I think some of these comments on this thread are ridiculous.
Folks, telling someone who is NOT a Christian that they should "suck it up and join a church" is the dumbest advice I've heard this week.
Would you tell someone who is not a Scientologist to suck it up and join Scientology? Seriously.
The problem is that there are still a lot of people here in this part of the country who think that the "default" setting for an American ought to be Christian, and not just Christian, but Protestant. Everyone else is supposed to hop on board or shut up. In most of America this sort of thinking went away in around 1928 or so, but sadly it's still alive in some pockets of the country, including right here in North Carolina.
OP, why don't you move to Charlotte? It's a nice enough city, and no one here gives a crap about any of the things you're talking about. I sleep in Sunday mornings and no one seems to care
Literally THE DUMBEST thing anyone has ever suggested to me. EVER.
I didn't see this post or I would not have continued trying to assist you with finding a place to call home.
I don't care at all what you do or do not believe. I explained to you a strategy that would help you get integrated into the community, especially with concern that your children get to know other kids and feel good about being in their new home.
I regret wasting my time. If you respond to everyone with that attitude, no wonder you are not finding friends. Sometimes we do what we need to do b/c it is the best way to reach a goal. But obviously, you are more concerned with being angry that folks don't meet your expectations than considering what strategies you can employ to change your situation.
Feel free to stop wasting time on my post since you have done nothing but offer me unhelpful advice, hijack every conversation and engage in numerous arguments. If you would like to stop contributing to this post at this point, I would have no objections.
Feel free to stop wasting time on my post since you have done nothing but offer me unhelpful advice, hijack every conversation and engage in numerous arguments. If you would like to stop contributing to this post at this point, I would have no objections.
I stopped several days ago. I wish I could magically retrieve the time I wasted trying to help you.
You have taken offense to advice offered in the best of spirit to help you find a spot in or close to Hickory where your commute is reasonable, your children enjoy their school and neighborhood and where you can find friends.
If you have decided on Charlotte, you will find the folks on the Charlotte board very helpful. We have many members who have moved here from LI. Maybe they will have some suggestions you find less offensive than mine.
Good luck.
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