What was the hardest part about relocating? (Stanley, Star: condos, buying a house)

[Miker2069]

Well our story is simply this. Both my wife and I moved to Boston after college to start careers about 15 years ago. I'm from Miami and she's from Washington DC. Boston was great, it was new, it was a high tech center (mid 80s to 2000), and life was good if you were in high-tech, wanted to get a good education at one of the many great schools and/or wanted to be apart of a very old city with a rich history. I LOVED (past tense) Boston. I still like many aspects of Boston. However it was never really the end stop for either of us. Especially my wife, for very specific reasons that I won't go into here, she wanted out. Yeah, I've got my share of gripes, and everyone has a gripe or two about an area they've become acustomed to. I was content on staying until I started to really want a change of environment and head back down south. My wifes been wanting out of New England for years. For me about the last 5 years. Being from Miami one would ask why we didn't go to FL or even DC (I know, it's not considered the "south"). We were actually headed back to Maryland/DC, but we wanted to try somewhere new. My wife's family is from NC (the coastal New Bern area), and has many fond memories spending summers there. So we looked at places in NC, and for a time many people moved to Raleigh from Boston (our friends at least no one was considering Charlotte, only because jobs took them there, or in a few cases a few friends were teaching at the local colleges in the area). I wondered about Charlotte, and to be honest because of the football team . So we put it on the radar. Knowing several people who grew up in Charlotte and now reside in Boston, we stayed with their local family first. We've heard from first hand experience about Charlotte-Meck being one fo the first school systems to integrate and all the challenges that resulted. We know Charlotte isn't the same it was 20,10, 5 years ago. We also experienced a lot of what is absoutely true, people are very friendly, the weather is what we like, and it feels right. The feeling right is very hard to quantify. So for us, it was expanding our horizons, we both didn't want to return to our childhood areas (just yet), not because we don't like them (I love Miami, my folks are there and love the tri-ethnic culture there) it's more that I feel like there's more to see out there. Who knows, after our kids graduate may be we'll move again? May be Washington State, Maybe Austin, or maybe Montego Bay, JA, or right over the border in Mexico (and join the 500K or so americans there ). But I'm not leaving any time soon . I'll ride out the population growth, the traffic, etc. I know change is eniminent and probably will be very rapid, but we are internally very happy and willing to roll with it.

[beachgal47]

A quick note as I'm heading home...

I'm with Cassie - I had 2 medical plans for 30 years - in the last 5 years, I've had 7... don't give up those benefits! Perhaps buy some land for now then you can come down and visit and get to know the area.

Good luck.

[Cassie]

Originally Posted by kellex

Well, we are not moving to to areas that you mentioned, we are moving to Reidsville in Rockingham County. I have been to NC very often (we were married there) and have visited the mountains, the coast, the cities, the foothills, etc. We have decided that whatever time we have in the environment we have chosen is better than time we would spend here.

I wish you well in Reidsville, Kellex, and I'm rootin' for ya, but it appears to me that everyone who is moving to NC thinks that they will be the exception to the rule -- that where they they are moving is different, etc. I fully understand the comfort that it brings people to NEED to believe that. Frankly, I would have argued just as vociferiously as you, had I not lived here ( this time) for almost a year. N.C. has changed. It hit the skids in 2001 with the outsourcing of and loss of textiles and manufacturing industries as well as the tobacco buy-outs. There is precious little being done to attract new companies or jobs to the state and what has been done, in many cases is laughable. Job competition is fierce --throughout the state.

The prices of homes ( new development) in Reidsville-- are simply WAY out of range for the locals. Only those who move there from other states can afford those prices. North Carolina is still economically depressed, and much of NC is turning into retirement areas... yes... the new Florida.. including Reidsville. I live in Rockingham County in an area that is far more poised for growth, much more accessible to amenities, than Reidsville. Rockingham is SEVERELY economically depressed. The answer for that economic depression on the part of the part of the powers that be, is to open a pony place.. errrrr... equestrienne center. I wonder how many groom's jobs will pay miminum wage? As long as you recognize that you may have a short window here ( we do) or you are one heck of an entrepreneur, I think you'll do fine.

You'd already bought and made the decision to close on your house before you asked any questions, so I said nothing to this effect on the other thread but please don't be deluded, like so many others into thinking that N.C. is the new frontier with tons of job opportunities and great benefits just awaitin' ya.

I will address what I think is a misunderstanding or misconception on this one. IMO, there is a great deal of truth to the statement that N.C. *is* the new "Florida."

Best wishes,

Cassie

[Chris M]

For me, in addition to missing my favorite restaurants, old job, and coworkers, the most difficult part is leaving my friends behind. I really didn't have to much luck meeting new friends as of yet. I even tried the personals but to no avail. It's great to have a big house, but it is lonely.

[Eddy G]

Originally Posted by beachgal47

A quick note as I'm heading home...

Perhaps buy some land for now then you can come down and visit and get to know the area.

Good luck.

Thats and excellent idea. We may look in to that.

Thanks

[Debdoyle]

Hi
I am from Ma and i have been reading your forum which i find very interesting. I live in Natick MA and I really love it here the only thing is the houses are smaller if you cna't afford a bigger one and there are not alot of neighbour hoods like the beautiful Sub divisions that are advised.. We went to Austin TX last year as we had this notion in our head that we would love it there. it was missing something and yes it was the green leaves the grass and the lushisness in MA. I am from Ireland orginally and i like my 4 seasons..
Does NC get that are is it humid all the time (more thatn the 4 months ln Ma)
I do think what Cassie is saying is so correct. you have alot of great points and i am sure you know as you are living there. My heart is in Ireland but my love and my own family r hear in MA.. so we willl go and check it out and see if it is like everyone says .. as they say you don't know tell you get there.. and that was the case with me when we went to TX on a limb.. beautiful houses subdivisions pools put ther was something missing.. so maybe what you have is alot better than what you think you want... take care and Cassie keep educating us on NC...

[pgray007]

Eddy,

I would suggest looking at your life holistically, and seeing what bugs you. If its your job, perhaps changing jobs while staying in MA is just the ticket. Perhaps even starting your own company. I'll go against the grain and not put too much weight in benes and pensions. I worked for a Fortune 500 company, with long time employees, "family" atmosphere and annual picnics, the whole 9 yards, a couple of years ago. I had a gut feeling that something was "funny" there, and decided to leave (I am younger so had less to lose, but gave up around $20K/year in "free" money through bonuses and pension-type plans). Two months later they cancelled the project and put people out on the street that had been there for decades. I'll never forget one man telling me "I have not written a resume in 26 years, I'm not even sure where to start." Many of these people were "clocking the hours" until retirement, and when the rug was pulled their whole life was turned upside down as they had never even entertained the thought that it could happen to them.

Don't kill yourself for some promises that can easily be revoked, unilatterally renegotiated or recinded (see Enron, UAW, Airline Industry, etc.)

Finally, I would not worry about which areas will be hot, cold or indifferent in 6 months/5years/15years. People have been migrating for millions of years and there are far worse things that could happen than having a super wal mart show up down the street (just ask all the tribesmen in Africa who retured to what is now South Africa after a long-running migration to find a bunch of white Dutch settlers, who told them about a little thing they were cooking up called Apartheid). Go to an area with your eyes wide open as to pros and cons, and if it moves you, do it. If you are happy with your life and the area changes you can either deal with it or move somewhere else. Just make sure the rest of your mental/spiritual/whatever house is in order since you'll probably feel just as crappy doing something you hate 40 hours/week with no mortgage as you would with a $1500 one.

[stmaarten]

Finally a voice of reason! Well stated, pgray007!

[OverTheHill]

If you are interested in moving to NC, be aware that there are 4 areas that are very different. I break it down to:

1) East
2) West
3) Central
4) Big cities

The great 'Yankee Invasion' that started in the late 60's and continues to this day has radically changed the large cities where there are jobs. Probably, the Raleigh, Durham, Chapel Hill area now has more invaders than natives. I was part of that invasion and lived there for 18 years.

If you move to an area that was not invaded, you need to understand that you will always be a Yankee. This is not as bad as it sounds but you will be treated differently.

The Central area culture is the most homogenized. The Western area culture is very different than the East. I will not repeat the stereotypes here, just ask some natives from the East and West. Another nice thing about the Central area is that you are about the same distance from the ocean and the mountains.

Bottom Line:

I would recommend a place where the Yankees have invaded. But I recommend that you not spend all your time with them. Get to know the natives. They may make fun of how you talk but you can return the favor.

One more very important thing. If you don't know anything about basketball, you had better start learning before you move to NC.

[Eddy G]

Originally Posted by OverTheHill

If you are interested in moving to NC, be aware


One more very important thing. If you don't know anything about basketball, you had better start learning before you move to NC.

OK, up front. I hate basketball. It's the 1 majore sport I never played, watched or cared for. While I'm at it I'm not a NASCAR fan either.

The only Yankee's I know of are in NY and I'm no fan of their's coming from Boston so I could never be called a Yankee ;}

I know I'll miss hockey. There is some in NC but not nearly what we have here. We're also big football and baseball fans