What are the people like in NC? (Charlotte, Durham: transplants, apartment)

[Lizardlips]

busymom;
why, please share. For those of us who are making plans for their move. What let us know your reasons.

[busymomof3]

My intent on sharing my thoughts wouldn't be to offend anyone who does enjoy NC..however, we aren't having a good experience...and I agree with with CG's concerns, because we heard the same concerns of others who had lived here, and we choose to disregard them. However, our experience has proved them to be so true. The way we have been treated here is EXTREMELY different than anyother place we have ever lived. The most disheartening aspect about moving is the way we have been treated. The only positive experience and friends we have made are with those from out of state....Other than that, the public education system is terrible, the private school tuition for our children is more than my mortgage, the humidity is torture, the highways are lined with trash and garbage, healthy living standards are almost obsolete (lots of smoking and not enough exercise options), quality healthcare services are limited (we travel 2 hours to Chapel Hill) and I could go on and on....What I find interesting is a section in the newspaper, specifically guided to newcomers, and it seems that it is always filled with natives defending their home? Many, many have responded that it has taken them years and years to feel like Charlotte is home....why is it so hard to fit in here? I just don't know. If I had to do over again, I wouldn't change a thing..because you will never understand it, until you experience it. I wish you the best of luck!

[fern33]

Busymomof3, I'm sorry to hear your move to NC was so unpleasant.

I may have overlooked it but what city do you live in?

[busymomof3]

the Lake Norman area.....

[Lizardlips]

Well busymom;
Thanks for your input. I just know that when my husband and I have traveled there on numerous occasion to scout out where we want to live, it amazed us how people were so open and nice. I remember one time at a fast food resturant and we were looking at a map to figure how to go from Clayton to Fuquay-Varina, and this guy came over and asked if we needed help, well the next thing we know, about three tables near us, they were all giving us input, and it turned into a nice little chat session.
I just feel bad that you have been treated poorly. I hope that will not be the case with us.

[RaleighRob]

Originally Posted by cgballer

Hi! My wife and I are considering moving to Durham (Duke) or Chapel Hill (UNC) for graduate school. We wanted to get an idea of what the area is like and how the people are. I have some specific questions:

- Some people we know who have lived in NC suggested that it wasn't easy for them getting accepted by the "natives" from NC. To what extent is that correct?

If you're moving to the Durham & Chapel Hill areas, this won't be an issue. Very diverse, lots of people from lots of places. You should fit in fine.

- Some people suggested that people in NC aren't very accepting of different religions & cultures. Is that true? We're catholic and don't go church every Sunday

again, not an issue for Durham/ChapelHill. There's people of every conceivable religion there...and lots with none at all. You'll blend easily in that regard.

- The term that best describes Fort Collins, Colorado (the place where we live now) is "wide streets, narrow minds." What term would describe Durham or Chapel Hill?

Durham's official logo is "City of Medicine", although others have called it "The Birthplace of the New South". It also has the nickname "The Bull City". Chapel Hill is basically something like "Birthplace of the nation's first public university" or something along those lines. College town-ish. Carrboro, a town on the west side of Chapel Hill (they blend so much you can cross the border several times and not know it) has the nickname "Paris of the Piedmont" cuz it's so "artsy". Some locals I know have called it "Mayberry meets Greenwich Village"...lol.

- We are originally from Indiana: Are the people in NC as friendly as they are in Indiana?

Depends on where in the state you are. ChapelHill/Carrboro has a bit of a small town atmosphere with a good deal of friendliness. Durham is pretty friendly too, for a city of its size....there are some very close-knit neighborhoods there where people look out for each other.

- There's a lot of discussion about Duke and the relationship the school has to Durham and it's citizens. To what extent is that problematic?

Well, town/gown relations can always be an issue. UNC has them with Chapel Hill, NCSU has them with Raleigh, and of course Duke will have them with Durham. The difference there is that Duke is a private university, so they're not subject to as much oversight in what they do, where they build, etc. Also the locals in Durham, especially in the older blue-collar areas, tend to feel like Duke, being an "elite" private university, looks down on them and they sometimes take it personally....especially when the rich college boys host wild loud parties in houses in the neighborhood, and the neighbors have to call the police. That kinda thing. You get the idea.
I'll skip the school question due to less knowledge in that area.

- What is the quality of life like? What is the landscape like?

Not sure how to answer that. The economy here is stronger than the national average these days. Lots of well-educated folks, professionals, and decent paying jobs. But strain of growth in some areas is pushing infrastructure to the brink. Luckily, that's less of a problem in Durham/ChapelHill than it is in Raleigh/Cary/Wake County, where the growth is much more rampant. Durham, Chapel Hill, and Carrboro seem to be doing a better job at keeping growth in check.

[Nea1]

Originally Posted by busymomof3

My intent on sharing my thoughts wouldn't be to offend anyone who does enjoy NC..however, we aren't having a good experience...and I agree with with CG's concerns, because we heard the same concerns of others who had lived here, and we choose to disregard them. However, our experience has proved them to be so true. The way we have been treated here is EXTREMELY different than anyother place we have ever lived. The most disheartening aspect about moving is the way we have been treated. The only positive experience and friends we have made are with those from out of state....Other than that, the public education system is terrible, the private school tuition for our children is more than my mortgage, the humidity is torture, the highways are lined with trash and garbage, healthy living standards are almost obsolete (lots of smoking and not enough exercise options), quality healthcare services are limited (we travel 2 hours to Chapel Hill) and I could go on and on....What I find interesting is a section in the newspaper, specifically guided to newcomers, and it seems that it is always filled with natives defending their home? Many, many have responded that it has taken them years and years to feel like Charlotte is home....why is it so hard to fit in here? I just don't know. If I had to do over again, I wouldn't change a thing..because you will never understand it, until you experience it. I wish you the best of luck!

I am so with you, we are from Oregon and moved to NC stayed two years and had the exact experience you did, so glad to be out!!!

[okaydorothy]

Hi there
Anytime we went to NC we found only helpful friendly people. We live in NY now and moved to this developement two years ago. Do you know how many friends my children have ; zero. They are 8 & 6 and are the only children here that go to catholic school, so they dont go on the bus with the public school kids and therefore didnt get to know any of the local kids. I totally wish it was different, but our school district is terrible. My dh and i have no friends in the development ; oh yes, we have had parties where we invited neighbours. Some came, some didnt and those that did come, never invited us to their house. Here on Long Island people tend to stay to themselves ; at least that is our experience and we have given it a long time ; 20 years.

When we move, our kids will go to public school, hopefully I will do some classes and get to know more people.
Sorry it didnt work out in NC,
dorothy

[Nea1]

When we visited we didnt have any issues either, everyone was very nice, but there is a big difference in living and visiting. Good luck in NC

[nightmoves44]

I will surely tell it like it is.Im from southern Ohio,I lived in Nc from 1986 to 2004. I gave it more than a chance,the guy who refered to you as a yankee above is correct,you are a yankee and they hate and resent you for this.The locals despise anyone above the mason dixon line.You will always be reminded you are a yankee..daily.Also NC is a police state,you will find the government there always in every aspect of your life,you will feel the police watching your every move,and being taxed for it.I was excited to move there since my grandparents were born there,but I am still a yankee to them.You will never call this place *home*.,best advice,stay where you are,or pick a different state..I feel sorry for you!..alan