It's not just northerners (Shallotte, Calabash: sales, home, casinos)

[Skipstone]

Mcja, that attitude stinks. Here: have a Mint Julep to help loosen life up a bit.

Brian, hearing you talk it's hard to see you leave.

NYer, I am really glad people like you are here, no matter where you're from. We've lived in so very many places and so when we drive around Raleigh we now see some of the positive influences brought in by transplants. For example, we might not have these wonderful health food stores if others had not moved here.

Regarding "no place like home" - in my case, I grew up outside a big southern city and moved away when I married, never to move back. I missed a lot of things, but adapted to the new. Still, it didn't feel particularly good when I went back to visit one day and found that my entire neighborhood and all the parks I'd spent so much time in as a kid - were concreted over with a sprawling mall and huge parking lot. It was all gone. The trees I'd climbed. The creeks I'd played in. Nothing left but good memories.

But we were enjoying the fresh scenery and the money earned while living elsewhere, so I'd get over it.

Then, within a space of just a few years both my husband and I lost our parents. He lost his and I lost mine. Like boom! They were gone. And those nice vacation visits suddenly didn't seem nearly long enough.

Our kids never saw their grandparents.

People die. Things just hang around collecting dust.

But yeah, our society is built around things nowadays. I got sucked in. And now I'm finally out of that way of thinking.

I don't have family here. They're all gone. But I have the familiarity of certain things no other place in this great country of ours has: mockingbirds singing atop trees, crepe myrtles blooming in mid-summer, four definite seasons with special delights, the seashore I remember as a child, the mountains I climbed in my twenties, but most important of all these things - I came home to people who feel like my relatives in many ways. Some of them may not have lived as many places as I have, but they're very rich in all the things that are important to me. My religious heritage is not in a closet here. It's out in the open. It's really nice telling someone "God bless you" in public without everyone's head turning with a cold stare.

With our society being one big U-Haul trailer constantly moving from place to place, I know that even if I had stayed in the city I grew up in, many of my friends would have moved elsewhere. For one thing, their houses would have probably been paved over. The city would have encroached around me just as it is starting to do here in the Triangle.

And I think that once it gets bad enough I will leave for greener pastures, but the pastures will still be in the same region I grew up in where I feel most comfortable and at home.

Where the way I talk is fine enough. Where the faith I have is widely considered a beautiful thing. I love the South and I always will, in spite of all the many positives I found in other areas. It's just because this is home.

Saying that is not a criticism of any other part of the country. I found many places that came close to here. I found people who I consider real sisters and brothers.

But I have to think that people who come here and look down on the people are only miserable because they need to go back home - where they can feel comfortable again.

Because you can't change the way people are. I've found people in every region of the country feel they're fine "just the way they are."

[NYer]

Skipstone, that was a beautiful post. I guess what I did nto make clear is that in addition to having so many people move out of my town, those moving in, for the most part, had no respect for what was there before. Why would they? They did not know what it had been like. My "way of life" was gone. Here in Nc, at least where I am, the pace & surroundings are more like Long Island used to be.
Long Island is a great place and I will always love it. And I have to admit some of the changes are great. They are just not great for me & my family. For many of those there now, it is a great fit.
I am the sort of transplant who does nto want it to change much here. I have met the kind of transplant who feels exiled from "civilization" here. I have only been here 8 months but I consiously chose to be here, yet I have begun to get defensive when those kinds of people complain to me about what isn't here. Why? Because I am here now, it is my home, and it is an insult, not only to natives but to those who chose to come here for what it is, not what we can make it.
I'm no Luddite, of course this place will grow. I just am in no hurry to see it becoem a pale reflection of NJ...

[Skipstone]

NYer, I think what you just wrote is beautiful.

I really believe that wherever we go in America most people will love us if we love them with kindhearted truthfulness.

And you certainly have that in your heart.

I can easily see how you'd want to be here to have a sense of what once was in the beautiful area you came from. That's why I can no longer live in the city I grew up in even though it's in the South. There isn't much there anymore either. Concrete just doesn't do it for me.

((((((((hugs!)))))))))

[BrianH1970]

Originally Posted by Skipstone

Mcja, that attitude stinks. Here: have a Mint Julep to help loosen life up a bit.

Brian, hearing you talk it's hard to see you leave.

NYer, I am really glad people like you are here, no matter where you're from. We've lived in so very many places and so when we drive around Raleigh we now see some of the positive influences brought in by transplants. For example, we might not have these wonderful health food stores if others had not moved here.

Regarding "no place like home" - in my case, I grew up outside a big southern city and moved away when I married, never to move back. I missed a lot of things, but adapted to the new. Still, it didn't feel particularly good when I went back to visit one day and found that my entire neighborhood and all the parks I'd spent so much time in as a kid - were concreted over with a sprawling mall and huge parking lot. It was all gone. The trees I'd climbed. The creeks I'd played in. Nothing left but good memories.

But we were enjoying the fresh scenery and the money earned while living elsewhere, so I'd get over it.

Then, within a space of just a few years both my husband and I lost our parents. He lost his and I lost mine. Like boom! They were gone. And those nice vacation visits suddenly didn't seem nearly long enough.

Our kids never saw their grandparents.

People die. Things just hang around collecting dust.

But yeah, our society is built around things nowadays. I got sucked in. And now I'm finally out of that way of thinking.

I don't have family here. They're all gone. But I have the familiarity of certain things no other place in this great country of ours has: mockingbirds singing atop trees, crepe myrtles blooming in mid-summer, four definite seasons with special delights, the seashore I remember as a child, the mountains I climbed in my twenties, but most important of all these things - I came home to people who feel like my relatives in many ways. Some of them may not have lived as many places as I have, but they're very rich in all the things that are important to me. My religious heritage is not in a closet here. It's out in the open. It's really nice telling someone "God bless you" in public without everyone's head turning with a cold stare.

With our society being one big U-Haul trailer constantly moving from place to place, I know that even if I had stayed in the city I grew up in, many of my friends would have moved elsewhere. For one thing, their houses would have probably been paved over. The city would have encroached around me just as it is starting to do here in the Triangle.

And I think that once it gets bad enough I will leave for greener pastures, but the pastures will still be in the same region I grew up in where I feel most comfortable and at home.

Where the way I talk is fine enough. Where the faith I have is widely considered a beautiful thing. I love the South and I always will, in spite of all the many positives I found in other areas. It's just because this is home.

Saying that is not a criticism of any other part of the country. I found many places that came close to here. I found people who I consider real sisters and brothers.

But I have to think that people who come here and look down on the people are only miserable because they need to go back home - where they can feel comfortable again.

Because you can't change the way people are. I've found people in every region of the country feel they're fine "just the way they are."

You've become one of my favorite posters on this forum, a true voice of reason. And you're right...it's truly wonderful to have someone say "God bless you" or even wish you a "merry Christmas" without the stigma of taboo that each seems to have in many other parts of the country.

That post was beautiful.

[Check123]

Things change, sometimes for the better, sometimes for the worst. If you were lucky enough to get in on the ground floor then living in NY isn't a problem. Same holds true in NC, or anyplace else. Get in early, live the good life, watch the late comers get booted by high costs. They'll move with the next wave of transplants, perhaps to Tennessee, and so the ebb and flow will continue.

[just_sayin']

Originally Posted by nyxmike

Actually, I don't think North Carolina will ever reach Florida or NY/NJ home prices. Look at Atlanta and Georgia - Atlanta is just as cheap as anywhere in NC and the same for Georgia. Both have been growing at an amazing rate, very similiar to NC. Florida has the Everglades and the ocean and limited land to build - that is what makes the home prices skyrocket. Same for parts of NY and NJ, which are mostly built out (atleast the parts that are commutable to the city). There is not a lot of room for new construction, etc. Cities in NC are not bounded by anything, and can therefore keep sprawling (which can be a bad thing - traffic and pollution), and that is how they remain cheap.

note....the atlanta metro has room....but it has basically come to a point where you will pay big bucks if you want to be anywhere near the businesses downtown. The central suburbs, and city itself, are getting just as expensive as FL, LI, NJ....its the far-out exurbs (meaning there is more demand for expressways and major commute infrastructure). If you were to superimpose a map of the Atlanta metro area over the triangle, centered around downtown raleigh or rtp....the "affordable places" would be closer to the sprawl almost to Fayettville to the south, the Randolph/Chatham county line to the west, into Virginia to the north, and past Wilson to the east. If it ever gets to that point (which I wouldn't doubt for a minute) Wake County will be just as expensive as all of the areas you guys are fleeing now.

[just_sayin']

Originally Posted by BrianH1970

Affording won't be too, too much of a problem (especially without any kids to worry about). The thing is that for us we came down here with the lure of a bigger, better home, a nicer area, all of the promise of a better life. For the most part it's very much attainable, however we're not happy here. The thing with myself is the you get what you pay for. So yeah...it's expensive living in New Jersey but my family, friends, and the places I love are all up there. To me that's worth it's weight in gold and far more than what North Carolina could ever provide. I'm a very strong believer in family. I'll gladly fork over that cash for a more fulfilling life as opposed to a two floor home with the two car garage. I know that, for me personally, I'll never be truly happy here. Why should I bother staying? It's like having a ticket for an event you really don't want to go to...let someone else who wants to go have the seat.

Brother, I feel the exact same way. It's not that I think NC is a bad place at all. It's a very nice place....i worry for its future as I believe just like you that it will soon be "another NJ". I'm willing to pay the high property taxes in upstate ny to be in an actual community that I am happy in and near family. Its probably even easier for me seeing as housing and everything else except for taxes is actually cheaper in upstate ny than it is even in most of NC...but I think we're on the same boat as you.

[BrianH1970]

Originally Posted by i'minformed

Brother, I feel the exact same way. It's not that I think NC is a bad place at all. It's a very nice place....i worry for its future as I believe just like you that it will soon be "another NJ". I'm willing to pay the high property taxes in upstate ny to be in an actual community that I am happy in and near family. Its probably even easier for me seeing as housing and everything else except for taxes is actually cheaper in upstate ny than it is even in most of NC...but I think we're on the same boat as you.

It's a beautiful place to live, there's no denying that. It just keeps nagging at me: What happens when the state looks to address the issues they're facing today. The lower cost of living cannot remain the same. What worries me also is this: Once taxes and such increase, and they will, how ready will the jobs be as far as paying to meet that rising cost? The wages down here already match the cost of living. Will those same jobs be able to keep up with that cost (better question: will they be willing to)? I'm sure someone's gonna think I'm painting a doomsday scenario. I'm just putting out food for thought is all. It's just the questions for any younger people who are considering moving down here should think about.

North Carolina has become the party where you've invited about 20 people and yet 1,000 show up.

[swacko]

doomsday scenario is not what you are painting it's more like realality. but we cannot forget the USA is open to all from any part in the world and untill we stop all peoples from coming into the great country growth will just keep going and going as the cities fill up and get bigger the desier for the open space for some people will force us to use more and more land like we have been doing for the past 200 plus years. i hope we never close are country to others that would be unfair and i do know we have some problems with it but on a hole it works. the ? is will nc have high taxes ? yes it will just like ny,nj,conn and any place else that has growth, but the growth is not bad its our freedom to be able to do it that we all seem to forget. three cheers for the USA !!!

[njprintman]

I see a lot of comparison to NC becoming another NJ.
I do agree that home prices are booming. LAND especially.
Lots of developments. Lots of Lowes & WalMarts.
Lots of people looking for a cheaper and better life style. ME.
One thing you must take into consideration when speaking of NJ. One very important thing.
NJ. Perfect together.
NJ. The most corrupt state in this country.
That my friends is what NC'ers must guard against. The political corruption if allowed to develop and grow will not only bring NC down but any other state.
With a lot of help and prayer Judy and I will be living in Calabash/Shallotte by this summer. We are 63 so we won't see what will happen to NC in the future. We will; however, make sure we vote and become involved, even in a small way, to make sure that NC does not become a NJ.
Denny
Woodlynne NJ