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Put it into terms I can understand? LOL. IF I move to NC, I will be calling it HOME from the day I obtain residency. Sorry if you do not like that, but it is what it is By the time all the northerners are done moving into the major cities, it will feel like home because the locals will be outnumbered anyhow. And my neighbors will have experienced and been through the same exact things as me and were looking for the same things as me. Sounds like home
Wow...I agree, that with THAT kind of attitute you won't find the proper friends, you would like to have, need in life. And, yes, you will set yourself up for constant battles, aggravation and failure.
Wow, again...I wouldn't want to be in your shoes, because if I would look for people like you descriped, I would consider moving to my neighboring states (NJ, NY etc....or just stay right here in PA!!!)
Instead, at this point we are looking into TN.....because maybe I want to "blend" in there instead, and really want to embrace the southern hospitality, which I can assure you, STILL excists, as long as you keep your LOUD MOUTH shut, and don't try to change the world, these people have been living in for so many generations.......
Give them a fair chance, and they will give you one!
If you do just that, I am so sure of the fact, that you will make some really good friends for LIFE, as the southern people are very loyal!
Just do yourself the favor, and don't set yourself up.........
Good luck, and a prayer....you'll need it.....
Just a point to ponder...Would you move to China, supposing you had studied Chinese here and could speak the language, and immediately set about telling the locals there how things were gonna be? How do you think folks there might feel about your insistence of doing things your way or no way at all? Would your aggressive demeanor win you many friends do you think?
I would not move to China to try to change their country. Big difference. This is America and NC is part of America.Did you actually read the long post I wrote, a few posts back I think that explains it to a tee...
[quote=MovingBack2PA;761290]Wow...I agree, that with THAT kind of attitute you won't find the proper friends, you would like to have, need in life. And, yes, you will set yourself up for constant battles, aggravation and failure.
Wow, again...I wouldn't want to be in your shoes, because if I would look for people like you descriped, I would consider moving to my neighboring states (NJ, NY etc....or just stay right here in PA!!!)
Instead, at this point we are looking into TN.....because maybe I want to "blend" in there instead, and really want to embrace the southern hospitality, which I can assure you, STILL excists, as long as you keep your LOUD MOUTH shut, and don't try to change the world, these people have been living in for so many generations.......
Give them a fair chance, and they will give you one!
If you do just that, I am so sure of the fact, that you will make some really good friends for LIFE, as the southern people are very loyal!
Just do yourself the favor, and don't set yourself up.........
Good luck, and a prayer....you'll need it.....
Again go back a few posts and read my long one I wrote earlier. I am a very nice person, but am not going to sit here on these boards and get insulted because I am from the north. So you are saying it is ok to run your mouth about me, but lord for bid me to speak up...sorry dont think so. Let me go ahead and repost it since it got lost amongst the bickering...
I am not trying to take over. But I am also not trying to live my life being an transplant. Telling me I am an transplant is like saying this will never be your home. Could you imagine living you ENTIRE life not having a place to call home? Sorry that is NOT okay in my book. Supposely southerners are church goers. God made this land for everyone, NCians can not put claim to their state and tell the rest of us we will never be able to call it home. Just because of the comments made on this board, I am seriously reconsidering my move to NC. I can not live somewhere where I am not welcomed. About the first time someone calls me a damn yankee, they are going to see what a REAL loud mouth is. No wonder why all the northerners move in and start acting the way they do(well at least according to the southerners). I do not like the things I am reading on this board, so when they move down there, they figure they do not want to act like the people here. Northerners stick up for themselves and are not going to be pushed around, everyone knows that. And once you start to push a northerner around they get loud. Growth is happening and has been happening EVERYWHERE. It is not just North Carolina. On top of that, I see the natives of NC blaming the northerners, what about illegal immigrants? They are living there too, althought they are not paying taxes to use the schools and facilities. They are too overcrowding the schools, roads, etc...but it is all the taxpaying northerners fault.
I understand that NC is upset, do they not think that NJ,CT and now parts of PA has changed because of the influx of NYC people? Do they not think that MD and VA has changed because of the influx of people from DC? Do they not think that FL has changed from the influx of northerners? It is happening EVERYWHERE. Up north used to not be so expensive, but we are getting runned out of our homes! We just can not afford to live here. So we have to where we can. NC is the next place. Every state experiencing growth and change, EVERY state. I was born in NORTHERN NY in a place called Watertown, at least 5 hours from NYC. My town used to be historical and a hot tourist spot. That was until they opened up a military installation. Now it is full of crime, fast food resteraunts, strip malls, the price of houses have went up, BUT no jobs were brought with the growth. I had to leave my hometown when I married, there were no decent jobs to support my husband and I, and eventually a family...there was also no cities close enough to relocate to. So we found ourselves in Charlotte, NC. Did not like it so 11 months later we moved to the Annapolis, MD area. Love it here!!! However, we bought our home 4 years ago and it is a duplex and my property taxes have doubled, my electric bill has tripled, along with the gas prices and the pains of all that. I would not mind all of these changes, however I would like to live in a single family home, which I will never afford because just an average run down home goes for 400K. You can not afford that on a police officers salary.
So here comes the opportunity for us to move to NC. It is a 13K paycut, which means less to retire on, etc. NC may have cheaper property taxes, but it has a great deal of other ones to make up for it, including but not limitted to the yearly tax on vehicles. But we would be able to raise our children in a nice community, in a single family home around what I thought were nice people.
So I hope you understand where I am coming from now. Point being change is happening everywhere, each state, each city they are all going to have their turn. It just happened up north earlier, so no one bothers thinking about that and what they went through.
***After I wrote this post I was commented by petluver telling me you will never be able to call this home and blah blah blah. Was there a need for that? I DON"T THINK SO!!!!
I would not move to China to try to change their country. Big difference. This is America and NC is part of America.Did you actually read the long post I wrote, a few posts back I think that explains it to a tee...
Anytime someone starts a sentence, "I am not trying to do such-and-such, BUT... They really are trying to just justify what it is they want to do, even if only subconsciously.
You say you understand NC is upset, but in fact you give no inkling that you understand the problem AT ALL.
Anytime someone starts a sentence, "I am not trying to do such-and-such, BUT... They really are trying to just justify what it is they want to do, even if only subconsciously.
You say you understand NC is upset, but in fact you give no inkling that you understand the problem AT ALL.
Most people do not understand how different the south is from the rest of the country. At least not until they live there a while. In my view, it takes more than a year or two to really get a sense of the culture. If you can agree with them that the North is inferior to the South, you will do fine. I have friends who grew up near where I did in Michigan, and who absolutely love NC. However, if anyone says anything negative about the North or Yankees, he chimes right in with them. While my family was from NC originally, I grew up in Detroit. After years down South (17 to be exact), I finally came to the conclusion that it just wasn't the place for me.
Bigger houses and lower taxes is not everything. People should understand that, or they will be miserable and make everyone around them miserable too.
Anytime someone starts a sentence, "I am not trying to do such-and-such, BUT... They really are trying to just justify what it is they want to do, even if only subconsciously.
You say you understand NC is upset, but in fact you give no inkling that you understand the problem AT ALL.
Okay, so for whoever gave me negative rep for this please show yourself and explain WHY this is off topic?? Sounds to me like you just don't agree with me, and we all know that is not cause for giving negative rep.
THIS POST IS VERY ON TOPIC. I am trying to help NJRover see the bigger picture about why some people in NC may be less welcoming than he thinks they should be.
Hats off to BrianH1970 who "gets it" and has respect for the situation.
He said, "Me personally, when I move back to New Jersey I wouldn't want to have a huge southern influx going up there. That's not a knock on the south or the people, that's just the culture I'd prefer to live in. Down here it's being taken away rapidly. So imagine living here your whole life, have your entire culture quickly being ripped away from you and you're helpless to stop it. This isn't happening to a single town but to an entire state and affecting nearly every aspect of life from open spaces to cost of living. I know if it happened to me I'd be pretty damn resentful."
No one is saying you can't move here NJRover, we are simply asking for you to try to walk a mile in our shoes and show some respect for what we are going thru. Join with us to appreciate all the wonderful things about living in NC, instead of telling us we should just be grateful for all the newcomers and commerce they bring. That's the kind of attitude that won't win you any friends.
Most people do not understand how different the south is from the rest of the country. At least not until they live there a while. In my view, it takes more than a year or two to really get a sense of the culture. If you can agree with them that the North is inferior to the South, you will do fine. I have friends who grew up near where I did in Michigan, and who absolutely love NC. However, if anyone says anything negative about the North or Yankees, he chimes right in with them. While my family was from NC originally, I grew up in Detroit. After years down South (17 to be exact), I finally came to the conclusion that it just wasn't the place for me.
Bigger houses and lower taxes is not everything. People should understand that, or they will be miserable and make everyone around them miserable too.
You are right - living in the south is not for everyone. Just like living in LA or NY would not be for me for sure. But it is important to remember, whereever you live, show some respect for the people and culture that have existed there long before you showed up. That's what I would do if I moved to China, or NY
what happens if you just plain don't want to go to church??? I am a believer, but have grown to dislike organized religion...is NC part of the 'bible belt'???
From my experience in North Davidson county (outside of Greensboro and Winston Salem) folks are very concerned if you don't attend the proper church and will assume you have some type of satanic bent if you don't feel comfortable in their church.
I grew up in a small Baptist church and came to enjoy the "annonymity" of a mid to large size church after being the only volunteer for so many years. None of the churches in my area were large enough to provide that level of insulation from being Mr. Do-it-all so I kept looking. My daughter caught the brunt of it at school when the other kids decided she was not saved and proceeded to launch an all out assault on her to join their churches. She could not have a moment in school without someone trying to convince her that their church could make all the difference in her life. They would not accept that our family was considering other churches and felt that it was just an excuse we were using because of our failings as good christians and there had to be a lack of faith issue that kept us out of their specific church.
Outside of that problem, we had no problems in the community and made quite a few friends even among those that felt we were poor sinners and needed to be saved in spite of ourselves.
You are right - living in the south is not for everyone. Just like living in LA or NY would not be for me for sure. But it is important to remember, whereever you live, show some respect for the people and culture that have existed there long before you showed up. That's what I would do if I moved to China, or NY
I was a pastor when I lived in NC so I had to show respect for the culture as part of the job description. The problem I had was the people who wouldn't let me forget that I wasn't one of them. Because I chose not to say Ya'll because I didn't think it was a good habit, since I spoke in other parts of the country...that kind of thing. So while I showed respect for the culture - though I didn't adopt all of its distinctions - there were some who wouldn't let me forget that I a Yankee. I got weary of it and finally left.
So I agree that at times outsiders are asking for it by their attitude, but not all the time.
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By the time all the northerners are done moving into the major cities, it will feel like home because the locals will be outnumbered anyhow. And my neighbors will have experienced and been through the same exact things as me and were looking for the same things as me. Sounds like home
