NEPAs Own Off-Topic Thread ( family, home, photos) (to live, food)

[Jungle George]

Originally Posted by rockky

JG, You have given me several laughs over the last few days. I can't rep ya, so I'll just have to say, "Thank you!".

This "repping" system sucks!! I try to leave points for good posts & all I see is "ya gotta spread it"!! Well, I'm "spreading it" & it STILL says that!!

I'm glad y'all got some laughs though!! As my brain-dead friends send 'em, I'll post 'em!!

[Jungle George]

1. The roundest knight at king Arthur's round table was Sir
Cumference. He acquired his size from too much pi.

2. I thought I saw an eye doctor on an Alaskan island, but it turned
out to be an optical Aleutian.

3. She was only a whiskey maker, but he loved her still.

4. A rubber band pistol was confiscated from algebra class because it
was a weapon of math disruption.

5. The butcher backed into the meat grinder and got a little behind in
his work.

6. No matter how much you push the envelope, it'll still be
stationery.

7. A dog gave birth to puppies near the road and was cited for
littering.

8. A grenade thrown into a kitchen in France would result in Linoleum
Blownapart.

9. Two silk worms had a race. They ended up in a tie.

10. Time flies like an arrow. Fruit flies like a banana.

11. A hole has been found in the nudist camp wall. The police are
looking into it.

12. Atheism is a non-prophet organization.

13. Two hats were hanging on a hat rack in the hallway. One hat said
to the other, 'You stay here, I'll go on a head.'

14. I wondered why the baseball kept getting bigger. Then it hit me.

15. A sign on the lawn at a drug rehab center said:
'Keep off the Grass.'

16. A small boy swallowed some coins and was taken to a hospital. When
his grandmother telephoned to ask how he was, a nurse said, 'No change
yet.'

17. A chicken crossing the road is poultry in motion.

19. The short fortune-teller who escaped from prison was a small
medium at large.

20. The man who survived mustard gas and pepper spray is now a
seasoned veter an.

21. A backward poet writes inverse.

22. In democracy it's your vote that counts. In feudalism it's your
count that votes.

23. When cannibals ate a missionary, they got a taste of religion.

24. Don't join dangerous cults: Practice safe sects!

[Jungle George]

GEOGRAPHY OF A WOMAN

Between 18 and 22, a woman is like Africa , half
discovered, half wild, fertile and naturally beautiful!

Between 23 and 30, a woman is like Europe , well
developed and open to trade, especially for someone with cash.

Between 31 and 35, a woman is like Spain , very
hot, relaxed and convinced of her own beauty.

Between 36 and 40, a woman is like Greece , gently
aging but still a warm and desirable place to visit.

Between 41 and 50, a woman is like Great Britain ,
with a glorious and all conquering past.

Between 51 and 60, a woman is like Israel , has
been through war and doesn't make the same mistakes twice,
takes care of business.

Between 61 and 70, a woman is like Canada ,
self-preserving, but open to meeting new people.

After 70, she becomes Tibet , wildly beautiful,
with a mysterious past and the wisdom of the ages...only
those with an adventurous spirit and a thirst for spiritual
knowledge visit there.


THE GEOGRAPHY OF A MAN

Between 1 and 80, a man is like Iran ,
Ruled by Nuts!

[I LOVE PA!]

Thought I'd post some pictures of my Christmas Village....
I really fuss to make it look just right...I like the snow to be seamless....

And that is my VERY OWN Clark Griswold...he does the outside...I do the inside! We have always done it REAL big on the outside, but I stink at getting a good picture of it.

And there are my snowballs....they 'play' on the fireplace mantle. My Aunt does beautiful ceramics and made me an assortment of 8.

[rockky]

ILOVEPA....nice pics! How big is your village?

Of course the snow must be seamless!!!!!!!!!!!! My Clark teases me about my artistic perfection all the time. Sometimes I think it's a gender thing. Men just don't see many things......well, some things............OK a couple of things here and there over the course of a year.......BUT it gets worse at Christmas!!!

[Jungle George]

Originally Posted by I LOVE PA!

Thought I'd post some pictures of my Christmas Village....
I really fuss to make it look just right...I like the snow to be seamless....

And that is my VERY OWN Clark Griswold...he does the outside...I do the inside! We have always done it REAL big on the outside, but I stink at getting a good picture of it.

And there are my snowballs....they 'play' on the fireplace mantle. My Aunt does beautiful ceramics and made me an assortment of 8.

Nice pix ILP!!! SOOOO nice & Xmasy!!! We're REALLY getting excited now!!

[I LOVE PA!]

Originally Posted by rockky

ILOVEPA....nice pics! How big is your village?

Of course the snow must be seamless!!!!!!!!!!!! My Clark teases me about my artistic perfection all the time. Sometimes I think it's a gender thing. Men just don't see many things......well, some things............OK a couple of things here and there over the course of a year.......BUT it gets worse at Christmas!!!

The village is not that big... I stopped adding when I thought it was nice looking but I would love to have more...then it gets to hard to manage though. I do need a Santa though!! I used to love putting it under the tree till we got our dog...
Yes...the snow...I like to use Buffalo snow...I have this tiered wooden thing underneath it all, like a mini stair case. My husband saw it on the side of the road in someones garbage - I think somenoe made it for this exact use! My SIL has 3 banquet tables with a village set up on it...she just cuts that flat snow in strips to cover the wires...the right snow really makes the whole thing.

[Jungle George]

Gennaro's Leather Shoes


Gennaro is in this country for only 6 months. He walks to work 20 blocks every day and passes a shoe store.

Each day he stops and looks in the window to admire the Boccelli leather shoes. He wants those shoes so much...it's all he can think about.

After about 2 months he saves the price of the shoes, $300, and purchases them.

Every Friday night the Italian community holds a dance in the church basement. Gennaro seizes this opportunity to wear his new Boccelli leather shoes for the first time.

He asks Sophia to dance and as they dance he asks her, 'Sophia, do you wear red panties tonight?' Startled, Sophia replies, 'Yes, Gennaro, I do wear red panties tonight, but how do you know?'

Gennaro answers, 'I see the reflection in my new $300 Boccelli leather shoes.
How do you like them?'

Next he asks Rosa to dance, and after a few minutes he asks,' Rosa , do you wear white panties tonight?'

Rosa answers, 'Yes, Gennaro, I do, but how do you know that?'

He replies, 'I see the reflection in my new $300 Boccelli leather shoes. How do you like them?'

Now as the evening is almost over and the last song is being played.

Gennaro asks Carmela to dance. Midway through the dance his face
turns red.

He states, 'Carmela, be stilla my heart, please, please tell me you wear no panties tonight, please, please, tella me this true!'

Carmela smiles coyly and answers, 'Yes Gennaro, I wear no panties tonight.'

Gennaro gasps, 'Thanka God ...

I thought I had a CRACK in my $300 Boccelli leather shoes!'

[Summering]

I love the sleigh wash.....I have never come across that anywhere. Really nice.
My kids did prefer me setting up the Village like that. In tiers going upward. They tell me in the hutch this year is more "decorator" style. When its in the corner set up as a real Village, I think the kids love it more. So..........next year..........back to the scene spread out. The hutch is cute, but ya' just don't get that real Village feeling. Plus I left out so much. The lighted ship for one thing........a larger pond too.

I went to a Christmas Pagent today. It was very nice. I love when the kids are "allowed" to sing Christmas songs. They had all the festive songs and trees, and garland. Hurray!

Last year I went to a Christmas show at one of the Forks, PA schools.........and it was very depressing.
It was the first time I ever went to a Holiday show with no Holiday music.
I sat a bit stunned in the end. I couldn't believe my ears..........." What was that?" I thought.
Also the one in NJ today was almost an hour. The one last year in PA was about 10 min.
Parents are taking a day off of work, grandparents are coming from hours away.........
The shows have to be more then 10 min.
People come to hear the Christmas songs, as they have come to these school shows for decades.
I'm not sure Forks, PA is having a pagent this year. Well, if it can't be cheerful, with delight for the holiday and the season......then they shouldn't. I mean at least Frosty and Jingle Bells.....Geezzzz.
Today I was singing along with a Santa song that I just learned the night before......I really tried not too....... BTW The other little guys ear tubes he got was a breeze.........All is Well, All is Bright!

[Jungle George]

For those who haven't looked outside, there's a "Long Night Moon"...Bill took some shots, but the clouds are scooty-pooping by too fast for a "clear" shot...

The last pix he musta clicked the camera on the neighbor's Xmas lights by mistake as he was moving...scared the heck outta me when it popped up on the screen as I was downloading....